The 5 Tests Your Date Should Pass Before You Invite Them on Another One, According to Experts

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Heather Taylor11
Characters, (pop) culture, and coffee.
April 16, 2024 at 8:14PM UTC
When we look back at our worst first dates, the not-so-scientific reason why there wasn’t a second date is that someone was not the best version of themselves. Your date could have been totally drunk or maybe they literally stunk, failing two of the six tests that relationship experts advise your date passes the first time you meet them. 
Which tests should everyone pass on a first date to make it worth a second? From drinking to dealing with the check, these tests will help you figure out if it’s worth it to see them again. 

1. The alcohol test

Meeting up with your date over happy hour? While many people opt for a glass of liquid courage on a first date to help take the edge off, drinking excessively probably presents a less than flattering version of your date. 

2. The hygiene test

Smelly breath on the first date gets a polite handshake at best at the end of the night. If it seems like it has been days, plural, since your date last showered or did any laundry, it's probably not a great idea to see them again. 

3. The “all about me” test

Talking about yourself on a date is fine. However, talking about yourself exclusively without attempting to learn more about the other person is definitely a dealbreaker.
“If the entire date is a running monologue on the date’s life without a single question about you, it’s a sign that they’ll be less likely to want to know more or care about what’s going on with you,” says Kayla Lords, sex-pert at Jack and Jill Adult. Lords also advises being on alert for dates that constantly interrupt you. This is an act they should make an effort to stop on their own, even if they did ask an interesting question. 
“If you’re unable to get in a word, they’re likely to do it every time you speak.”

4. The ex test

The ex files may be brought up as soon as the first date, especially if you’re looking to get into a serious relationship quickly. Mary J. Gibson, relationship expert at DatingXP, says to watch what your date says about their past relationships. Do they badmouth their ex or look like they’re on the verge of tears? According to Gibson, this might mean your date still harbors residual feelings and may not be ready for something serious with you.
Breakup and dating coach Cherlyn Chong agrees that a date that is visibly bitter when discussing their ex isn’t ready for a relationship. It’s highly likely that due to unresolved past baggage you would be treated just like their exes, too. 
“An ideal date is someone who has grown from their negative experiences, not become a victim,” Chong says.

5. The little annoyances test

Pay attention to how your date behaves around wait staff if there’s a mistake with their dinner order, or if how they react to a concert not starting on time. Lords says that how your date handles minor annoyances provides you with better insight into their personality. If your date blows up or gets disproportionately angry, that’s a dealbreaker. Check please. 

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