“If you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will.” -Greg Mckeown
5. Don’t share secrets that aren’t yours to tell.
When I was in college, my two friends (I’ll call them Tim and Erica) abruptly broke up. It was awkward and involved a lot of hurt feelings. A few months later, I was told Tim had started dating someone new. Apparently, he didn’t want people to know about it, and it was kind of a secret. Sure, whatever. So I kept my mouth shut about it.
For the next few weeks, I’d be around Erica and her friends, and they’d sometimes talk about the ex-boyfriend, wondering if he was dating anyone new. I didn’t say anything. I didn’t lie — I just didn’t comment. It wasn’t my secret to tell.
One night, a bunch of us friends were hanging out. Tim arrived, and revealed to us that he was dating someone new, which was quite a shock for many of Erica’s friends.
“I didn’t tell anyone,” Tim said. “Although, I think Anthony was one person who found out.” I confirmed that yes, I had known.
“What!” my girlfriend said in shock. (She was Erica’s best friend.) “You knew? And you didn’t say anything??”
I had never really been that close to Tim, but from then on, we developed a sort of unspoken trust — he knew I was someone that didn’t tell his secret, even though I could’ve.
A few months later, there was another instance where someone had been gossiping, and people were wondering who was spreading rumors.
“I know it’s not Anthony,” Tim spoke up in my defense. “He knows how to keep a secret.”
Most people can’t wait to gain some temporary attention by spreading juicy information, but it always comes with a cost — people don’t respect a gossip.
Don’t tell secrets that aren’t yours.
— Anthony Moore
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This article first appeared on Medium. It later appeared on Ladders.
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