Should You Mention Being a Parent in a Job Interview? What to Consider

Wondering whether you should mention being a parent in a job interview? It’s a common—and tricky—question.

Parental status discrimination is illegal. Period. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) makes it clear that discriminating based on gender—which includes pregnancy, childbirth, and related conditions—is against the law. That includes bias against mothers. 

Still, reality doesn’t always align with the law. For many candidates, especially mothers, this becomes a calculated decision.

Parental status discrimination is real—even if no one talks about it

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: A 2022 study proves bias against moms in the hiring process is silent. It’s subtle. It’s coded. 

You won’t hear a hiring manager say, “We didn’t choose her because she has kids.” But that unspoken calculation? The one where they assume you’ll be less available, less flexible, or more expensive because of childcare needs? That’s what we’re up against. This is what’s known as parental status discrimination, and for mothers, it tends to hit harder.

Read this next: The 25 Red Flag Interview Questions You Should Never Answer

Why do interviewers ask about family background?

There’s a long-standing (and outdated) idea that moms are less committed to their careers, more likely to miss work, and more “distracted” than their non-parenting peers. 

Sharon DeLay, a senior certified HR professional and owner of HR consulting firm GO-HR, explains some of the thinking that may be happening behind the scenes: “For smaller companies, where there are few employees and no backups for an employee who is out, that can be  scary.” 

It’s often less about someone being a mother and more “about ‘Who is going to get the work done while you’re out?’” DeLay says.

Of course, the irony here is clear—working moms often demonstrate exceptional efficiency, adaptability, and drive, balancing both their professional and personal responsibilities with impressive skill.

So… should you mention being a parent in an interview?

You don’t need to—and you probably shouldn’t. “Answer only the questions you are asked and focus on your skills and experience,” DeLay says.

This doesn’t mean you’re hiding anything. It just means you’re choosing to focus on what matters: your qualifications, your experience, and the value you bring to the role. 

What to do if the interviewer asks if you have kids?

Questions like “Are you married?” or “Do you have (or plan to have) kids?” are not appropriate in an interview. If you’re asked these directly, you have every right to sidestep the question or redirect the conversation back to your qualifications.

Here are a few ways to respond with grace and confidence:

“Do you have kids?”

I like to keep interviews focused on my experience and how I can help your team reach its goals.

“Do you need flexible hours for your family?”

I’m confident I can meet the expectations of this role and am happy to discuss scheduling if needed later in the process.

“Tell me about your family.”

I’m happy to share more about my background professionally. I’ve worked in… 

Be aware: Interview questions about family might be disguised

Even if the interviewer doesn’t explicitly ask “Do you have kids?” (and they shouldn’t), there are still ways the topic might sneak into the conversation:

• Small talk: You’re asked what you like to do in your free time, and you instinctively say, “I love spending time with my kids”

• Benefits chat: The recruiter mentions the company offers childcare support or flexible schedules for parents who need it and waits for your reaction

• “Tell me about yourself:” You want to paint a fuller picture and casually mention your kids while talking about what drives you

There’s nothing wrong with being proud of your family. But this is a professional setting—and unless your parenting experience directly relates to the role (for example, if you’re applying for a position in child development or education), it’s best to steer the conversation back to your strengths, goals, and what you can contribute.

Your identity as a mom doesn’t affect your ability to lead a project, write clean code, close a sale, or run a team—and it certainly doesn’t belong in the “tell me about yourself” part of the interview. That question is not an open invitation to list your personal life. It’s your moment to highlight your professional story. Keep the spotlight there.

Read this next: Conversational Interview: What to Do When It Feels More Like a Friendly Chat

But can you mention family in an interview, if you want to?

Of course, some moms do choose to bring it up—especially if being a parent is core to their identity or they’re proud of navigating work-life balance. That’s valid. But it’s important to approach it thoughtfully.

You can absolutely mention your family if you feel safe and confident doing so. The key is to share it in a way that supports your professional narrative—not distracts from it.  “Sell your ability relating back to the job,” DeLay says. 

Ask yourself: Is there a professional version of this answer? Instead of saying something like, “I spend weekends with my kids,” try reframing it to highlight your personal skills. For example: “I love recharging on the weekends—usually with a mix of outdoor time and catching up on reading.”

This way, you're sharing a bit of your personal life, but still focusing on how it shapes your professional qualities.

If you’re a parent, you’re also likely to have skills that benefit your professional life. You can mention these in a way that reflects positively on your qualifications. For instance: “As a parent, I’ve learned to manage multiple priorities, stay flexible, and problem-solve in real time—all of which show up in how I lead projects at work.” 

See? You’re still the main character here—not your kids.

“I landed the job! Now, do I have to tell my employer I have children?”

Congratulations on the new job! Your family information remains personal information, and it’s entirely up to you if or when to share it. Of course, once you're in the company, that conversation is usually more open. You may need to share it if due to benefits, especially health care.

That being said, can we give you one last piece of advice? Still keep details to yourself, like your desire to expand your family, or if you need to take personal days off because of your children. Your employer doesn't need to know that much.

At the end of the day…

Being a mom is one of your many strengths, but that doesn’t mean it has to be part of your job interview script. Focus on your skills. Highlight your impact. And protect your peace by steering clear of biased traps, however well-meaning they might seem.

You don’t owe anyone your family story. What you do owe yourself is the chance to be evaluated for the incredible professional you are.