Tracee Ellis Ross Nails Why Women Should Embrace Their Fury — Not Stifle It
Tracee Ellis Ross — star of ABC's "Black-ish," daughter of Diana, and absolute feminist icon — gave a recent TED Talk outlining how women should embrace the fury they feel, rather than attempt to suppress it.
Ross began her talk by telling the story of an actress friend. Ross' friend was filling out forms at a post office when a man, who apparently did not like where she was standing, very literally picked her up and moved her out of his way.
Her friend described a "fury" that rose up in her after the experience — a fury she could not explain.
"There's a culture of men helping themselves to women," Ross said. "And in this case, in a seemingly innocuous way, where a woman's body is like a saltshaker: 'Get out of the way so I can get to the fries.'"
Ross compared her friend's incident to the serious issue of sexual harassment and assault that's led to the much-needed MeToo and Time's Up movements.
"We try to make sense of nonsense, and we swallow the furious feelings," she said. We try to put them into some hidden place in our minds, but they don't go away. That fury sits deep inside as we practice our smiles ... because apparently, women aren't supposed to get angry.
"We try to put them into some hidden place in our minds, but they don't go away. That fury sits deep inside as we practice our smiles ... because apparently, women aren't supposed to get angry."
Ross went on to elaborate on the "fury" she believes many women are experiencing inside.
"That fury that my friend felt holds centuries of never being able to directly address or express our indignation, our frustration, and our rage," she said. When someone thinks they can help themselves to our bodies, it not only ignites the current fury, but it lights up the past. What seems like a benign moment at the post office is actually an anger grenade. Well, kaboom!
"When someone thinks they can help themselves to our bodies, it not only ignites the current fury, but it lights up the past. What seems like a benign moment at the post office is actually an anger grenade. Well, kaboom!"
Ross ended by calling on all men to hold themselves accountable, to be self-reflective, compassionate, and open.
"May you ask how you can support a woman and be of service to change. And may you get help if you need it," she said.
She then addressed the women, imploring them to acknowledge the fury they feel.
"Give it language. Share it in safe places of identification and in safe ways," she said. "Your fury is not something to be afraid of. It holds lifetimes of wisdom. Let it breathe and listen."
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