Do you dread going to work each day because your boss makes your life miserable? You’re not alone. According to the “State of the Global Workplace: 2023 Report” done by Gallup, 44% of employees worldwide say they experience a lot of stress and managers play a major role in it.
Working for a toxic boss can, in fact, be extremely stressful and has been proven to lead to many types of health problems. Besides the personal effects, it can also affect your career, as you may start to engage and dedicate yourself less.
However, there's a way out. The first step to getting out of a toxic environment is having awareness of what’s really happening around you at work. Once you’ve identified the signs, you can take action to avoid, stop or let someone know about the behavior, and start thriving in your career once more. With that in mind, here's 21 warning signs of a toxic boss.
A toxic boss' traits and behavior can vary according to the environment they're in and the motives behind their actions. Some are harmful on purpose, while others aren't very aware of the things they say or do. Either way, toxic bosses usually engage in one or more of these behaviors:
They think they have all the answers and refuse to hear other opinions. They promote people who validate their right and demote people who challenge them. For example, you might spend time doing research to support a presentation to a client, only for them to ignore it and decide to go with an approach that is purely based on their opinion.
This is discouraging because it’s usually not based on performance. Their favorite has clear advantages such as access to resources or benefits that are not made available to others. A toxic boss that plays favorites can also undermine your work to make their golden employee look better.
If by chance you have the opportunity to work on an important project and get good results, they will present the findings and take responsibility for the work. Sometimes, you aren’t even allowed in the room.
They spend a lot of time managing up and sucking up, but they have no time or interest in mentoring you. Conversations about your future or development are seldom had. This is one of the most common signs of toxic bosses who don't want to see their employees grow professionally.
You’ll rarely get recognition for your work or helpful advice on how to improve, much less exposure to other parts of the company when you're doing a great job. They may only come to you with feedback when you make a mistake.
They aren’t interested in hearing other people’s opinions and will deliberately shut you down if you speak up. They may also block you from joining cross-functional meetings or from sharing your opinion in public forums.
Disparaging comments and body language such as eye rolls when you speak can be devastating. They may also demonstrate subtle (or not so subtle) gender bias. Things toxic bosses say can include inappropriate jokes about gender, your personal life, or appearance.
They pit one team member against another to create unhealthy competition and to destroy feelings of camaraderie. For example, they purposely withhold information from you so you can make a mistake and look bad in front of your colleagues.
Other common toxic boss traits are engaging in gossip and spreading rumors about their employees. Gossip can be very damaging to the health of a work environment, as people start to see their colleagues in a bad light. Be aware if they’re sharing gossip about others, they are most likely spreading rumors about you too.
It’s demoralizing and humiliating to have your boss say something demeaning about you in front of your colleagues or direct reports. For example, instead of giving you feedback for something that you did wrong privately, a toxic boss will do it in front of others.
They assign you a project but then remain constantly involved in every step. They don’t allow you to think on your own or take any action independently.
This is the opposite of micromanaging. They don’t have a clue what you’re working on or the effort involved from you or your team. Because of this, they aren't of any help when you need support in a project or task.
They never take responsibility for their failures and are quick to assign the blame to others. They are willing to throw others under the bus or double down on why they're right instead of fixing their mistakes.
This is truly sadistic behavior, but toxic bosses will use any means to have control over others. They may know things about your personal life that they use against you with grating comments or mean forms of manipulation.
They aren’t guided by any one set of principles except their own self-interest. They break the rules for their own personal gain and do not follow general cultural principles that are instilled by your work culture.
Your boss may make you feel like you're crazy—like you are misremembering details about what they said or what you accomplished in order to maintain control over you. This process is called gaslighting, and it's a sure sign that your work situation is toxic. It can have a negative impact on your mental and emotional health.
Your boss may make you feel like your abilities aren't up to snuff or that your accomplishments aren't important or weren't the result of your actions. This is a way to keep you feeling low and to maintain control over your self-esteem.
If your boss is always texting you on your day off or asking you to work overtime, they're displaying a toxic disregard for your existence as a human being. Especially if working during time off isn't a mainstay of your workplace culture.
If your boss is always cracking a joke, even in a “nice” way, they're not being respectful of you in a professional way. If their comments make you feel bad about yourself, it's fair to say the situation is toxic.
If your boss is friendly one minute and throwing a temper tantrum the next, their emotional immaturity may be creating a toxic work environment. Healthy leaders are stable and professional when interacting with their employees.
If your boss is always making you or your team feel fearful about your place in the company or your ability to meet goals, they may be using fear as a toxic means of control. Healthy leaders use positivity and common goals as a means of motivation—not fear.
As you can see from this list, working with a toxic boss that has some or all of these traits is damaging to your physical and emotional health. It’s also devastating to the overall business and your career.
One incompetent or narcissistic bad apple can take down a business if allowed to persist. Did you recognize your boss' behavior in the signs we described? If so, then the next step is learning how to handle it.
Here are some tips on how to deal with toxic boss:
If your boss is that toxic, chances are you're not the only one who feels this way. Find allies or make friends with people who share the same experience. You can support each other and serve as witnesses in situations where, for example, your boss may try to gaslight or spread rumors about you.
You're the best judge of how to do this and whether you should at all. Your boss may not even be aware of their behavior, so it's possible that discussing how it's affecting you and your work privately may make them reassess it.
If your boss is harassing you or doing anything else illegal or against the company code of conduct, this may be your first step. But it doesn't need to reach that level for you to go to HR with your issue. If your boss is generally behaving inappropriately, the company should know.
If you've tried the previous steps and there's no hope of your boss improving, then it may be time to resign. You should, of course, weigh the pros and cons to determine if this is the right step for you. Sometimes, enough is enough.