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Leading Women

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Group Post

Anonymous
06/15/20 at 3:02PM UTC
in
Leading Women

I'm Struggling with Giving Someone Feedback

We send out a bi-weekly communication from one of the groups that I chair at my work. This group supports almost 300 women at my site. We have several sub-committees, including one for communications and community engagement.. The Co-Chair for this role, does not commit much time into it (actually there are two, and the second is on a leave of absence) I logged in this morning to a produced newsletter that had not been approved by myself or my other co-chair of the network, with two items that had been copied and pasted, the alignment was completely off, there were words way to the left, and then words way to the right.. It was just completely off... There was no acknowledgement to the network.. No "The group would to share these with you because..." , and there were no other resources or job aids, or articles to help our women at our site, just these two links with pictures.. I feel like she produced this in haste. That she was in rush to do it, just one more thing to check off her list. I also feel like this has been a reoccurring issue over and over again. When I addressed it with her before, she said the last co-chair would not allow her to put her personality into the newsletter, that she wasn't allowed.. I told her that I want her to do that! That's how we encourage people to read, by building a relationship via the writing... But now I feel like this was an excuse. I don't believe she is carrying her weight, and I feel like she is doing this with any passion or care of it's impact... On top of that, the items she posted were sensitive in nature and we are required to seek HR approval. She did not.. I feel like I'm just talking to a wall when I give her the feedback. So is my Co-Chair, who I have had give her the feedback as well, because we are in agreement. (I thought maybe if she heard from someone other than me, she would listen) Next steps is to remove her from the position, which I do not want to do, but at the same time, this can't be acceptable work, that she has been given feedback on multiple times and she isn't learning from or even trying to. These positions are for networking purposes. They help to network you and get your name out there. At this point it feels like she is doing this to put it on her resume. I know that we are home for a pandemic and that people are going to make mistakes.. But where do I draw the line? Others have also reached out and given me feedback directly on the newsletter, and there for a while, she wasn't even producing one at all, I had to step in and do it because I had asked her multiple times, and had no response. Then she got upset in a meeting and I think that was because she didn't want anyone to know that she wasn't carrying her weight I'm just at my wits end and unsure what to do. I don't want to be the mean person who removes her, because no one ever has done this, but it is an option. (and yes, I have gotten a second person for her while the other is out on leave too!! But she is not utilizing her either) At the same time, I don't want to send the message that the lack of effort is acceptable. If you don't have the time to do something like this, SAY THAT. Which I have asked her multiple times how she is doing there, and how I can support her best, and she always says she is fine. I don't know though. I'm struggling with how to handle.... Advice?

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ExecCareer
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Executive Coach | Women's Leadership
06/18/20 at 3:15PM UTC
So sorry to hear how frustrating this is for you. Based on your description, it sounds like the newsletter is not a good fit for her. Does she have other strengths that she's passionate about using? Have you seen her do well in other areas? Instead of removing her entirely, maybe you could say something like: "I know the newsletter has been challenging for you. We could really use some more help over here, which I think would be a great fit for you. Would you be open to transitioning to this new role? " This allows you to solve the immediate problem with the newsletter while still enabling her to contribute. The other thing to consider is that, while it may make sense to remove her, that can leave a bad taste in other people's mouths who aren't as close to the situation, particularly if she talks to others about it. Shifting her to a more appropriate role for her skills/time commitment can also avoid inadvertent negative PR for the group.
Laney Balis
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347
REALTOR® @ Align Right Realty Riverview
06/15/20 at 8:22PM UTC
I read your post a couple of time to make sure I understood the situation as you have explained it. It appears that you've had several conversations with the co-chair about the bulletin, her lack of passion, and time commitment to creating the bulletin properly. I would suggest one last very open, honest conversation about her commitment, desire to be a co-chair and the responsibilities involved. Depending upon how you feel after that conversation you may need to take the next step and have her removed. In any other business I believe that would have happened already. While it is a difficult decision/step it seems to be a necessary one to make sure your committee/group is accomplishing what it has set out to do - support those 300 women seeking help or advice. Good luck.
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Leading Women is designed to provide women professionals with opportunities to explore questions/challenges around career and leadership development topics, such as building your confidence, expanding your visibility and developing your influence. It's a warm and safe place to connect with, support and learn from other women. This group is an extension of the Leading Women discussion group -- a virtual discussion group that meets via Zoom on the 1st and 3rd Thursday of ...Read more

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