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Admitting the truth to oneself
I started my first job on 29 August 1979; I still remember my employee number. I worked a number of jobs in freight yards (I worked for a railroad), and kept getting bumped because of low seniority to the point where I had to work 11 PM -7 AM with Tuesdays and Wednesdays as days off. In 1982, I was trained as a programmer, learning COBOL, CICS, TSO and other IBM mainframe technologies. In subsequent years, I worked for six other companies as a programmer, database administrator (IMS/DL1), Unix Systems Administrator (HP-UX, Solaris, Silicon Graphics IRIX, AIX, NCR Unix, etc) and database administrator (Oracle, HP-UX/AIX/Solaris; even installed Oracle on a VAX running VMS (and I didn't know VMS, but I figured it out))
I was informed 14 May 2020 that my group was being outsourced and my position eliminated, that 1 July 2020 would be my final day at work. I completed upgrading seven Oracle 12.1.0.2.0 databases to 19.3, conducted Knowledge Transfer sessions with the outsourcer DBA's, went through the rollercoaster of anger, fear, anxiety, feeling lost, etc)
I've been submitting resumes, I've even had a few interviews - and the truth is: I DO NOT WANT TO DO DBA WORK ANY LONGER. As a 1958 Baby ;-), I'd hoped to make it to 2025 (age 66 and 10 months to collect full Social Security; fortunately, I've been blessed to put quite a bit away in a 401k, I was given an Executive Variable Deferred Plan with a distribution to be given upon 'separation from the company'; I've paid off all debts, and I pay the credit cards off each month. Three CFP's have told me I have sufficient funds to retire, and I'm planning to relocate from very expensive Southern California to Utah, which has an overall lower cost of living - I've been there seven times, including twice in the winter, and I have a great friend who lives there who relocated from Southern California five years earlier who is helping me.
I was offered placement counseling as part of my separation (I was also blessed to be given a year's severance pay, along with 165 hours of vacation pay, so that has given me options) - I attended the seminars, had my resume re-written, and just felt angry, frustrated and trapped with the entire process. It was on a call with a placement counselor that I just let it out: I don't want to work as a DBA any longer. I worked a lot of 60-90 hour weeks, nights, weekends, holidays; I loved my projects, I loved doing Oracle on Unix (NOT Windows ;-)); I'd even done a bit of MySQL and started learning a bit of Postgres. I knew enough SQL Server to get out of a wet paper bag - I just didn't want to do that kind of work any longer, and a great weight lifted off of me when I finally said it out loud.
I am continuing to submit applications, as I am getting unemployment compensation, and who knows, something may pique my interest again. I'm also taking community college courses in Criminal Justice, and I love them; I mentored three women as part of two prison ministries at the California Institution for Women (CIW), Corona - I would really like to get into helping women coming out of prison become contributing members of society - two of the three women I mentored have Ph.D's - one just published her first book on Muted Group Theory (her Ph.D is in Intercultural Missions) and the other is working (with the full agreement of the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation (CDCR) on a Boeing/JPL/NASA project (she has a Ph.D in aeronautical engineering - CDCR figured it would be better than having her work in a factory ;-))
It's important to admit the truth to oneself.
Your story is wonderful and I feel the same. Congratulations on continuing to reinvent yourself and growing.
You have an amazing journey and I love that you are finding a second career in criminal justice.