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Diary of a Burnout Survivor
Who here's survived burnout? What was your path out? And how did you know when you'd turned the corner?
I have survived burn-out by ultimately finding a new job. I had an honest conversation with my boss where I explained to him that the amount of work in my department (of 2 people!) was not sustainable long-term. He asked me how I was getting everything done and I told him - 12 hour+ days, weekends, evening, etc. He flat out told me that he didn't think I was really putting in those hours and that he didn't believe the work being done really took that long. It must have been because I didn't really understand what I was doing. I have 12+ years in my field and he has zero years in my field. I realized at that moment that no amount of work was going to make me be valued at that compay.
Since then, I've found another job, started meditating and seeing a psychiatrist who has prescribed supplements for me (like B12). I feel much better and know that I am valued, both professionally and personally.
If it feels wrong for you, it IS wrong for you. And no one can validate that for you but YOU. I just wish I had listened to myself sooner.
I'm a three-time survivor of creative burnout as a graphic designer in corporate America. My path out and my method of breaking such a bad practice was to step away from design for a year to recalibrate my sense of creativity, give myself the space, time and healing to create on my terms. After 13 years of being a creative professional (11 as a graphic designer), I was tired of always feeling like my creativity was being pigeonholed by bad managers who envy a creative's capacity for creative ingenuity yet treat us like corporate vassals rather than equitable partners in the craft of business.
In my last permanent role, I was being groomed for a more senior role but I felt like my boss and manager were setting me up to fail because they had high expectations for me to be more confident yet they gave me no opportunity to learn and grow into my confidence on my terms, but theirs alone. I felt like the way they played favorites and social politics created a toxic environment that further diminished my experience there and convinced me that they weren't building me up to be the best designer I could be, but using me for what they could get at the expense of me.
We creatives breath life into corporate disciplines that REQUIRE our skills in order to conduct business reputably and succeed according to the best practices of sound business sense. Yet my profession continues to be under-valued and oppressed by non-creatives who cannot do what I do yet profit from my blood, sweat and tears all the same. While design wasn't my first choice in profession, I've done it the longest and that fact keeps me in the field but this break from design was exactly what I needed in order to learn how to better myself in all areas. The time was well-spent working on my confidence, self care, and mental/emotional health, so that when I do return back to a creative (or creative-adjacent) field of my choosing, I'm much more resilient and better prepared to weather any challenges that the workplace puts in my path. WIthout this necessary break, I honestly think I'd be repeating the same unhealthy mindset of working my ass off and getting NO respect and little recompense in return for the sacrifice of my time, wellbeing and energy.
There is a quote by Maya Angelou that I live by: "Do your best until you know better and when you know better, do better." I was a teacher for five years. I made it my business to be the very best that I could. I learned all I could and reached out to mentors, colleagues, and supervisors. After a while I realized I knew and deserved better. So I resigned. Take care of yourself. Sleep in when you can, watch your favorite shows, read books on self-care, meditate, eat your favorite foods, blare Lady Gaga while on the elliptical. You'll be back to your old self in no time!
I advocated for myself with HR and my higher ups to get out of a project team where one of my managers was a poor listener, condescending, and was essentially setting me up for failure. I had worked on a project with him for 2.5 years and we were close to the end, maybe another 3-6 months left. But I was hating life and I was so burnt out. I was questioning all the decisions I made and had no confidence in myself or my work.
2 weeks ago I was transferred to a new team and I am not looking back! This new team is completely different and normal, and it has allowed me to see how I was just "grinning and bearing it" at my last project. I didn't even realize how much it was affecting me.
How to tell when I turned the corner... Hmmmmm. I read somewhere someone describing burn out and the stress leading up to is as such:
All the stuff leading up to the burn out is like getting to the edge of a cliff. you can go up to the edge and stress and life can make you feel like you are hanging over it, but you can step away or pull yourself back up fairly easily from this place.
But when we suffer from burn out, its like we have fallen off the edge and hit all the rocks on the way down. Not only are we hurting and tired, but we are now at the bottom and have to pull ourselves back up the entire cliff!
It's going to take time and giving yourself a lot of patience and love to get back up the cliff. I have been burnt out for about 6-8 months and really have stared to just now feel like I am 70-80% back to my old self. I'm sure it will take me another 3-6 months before I am even close to 100%.
I left my assistant director position at a large corporate child care center and went to the employee child care center of the local school district as a preschool teacher. Best move ever! My heart is in the classroom and being a manager wasn't fulfilling me.
Preach it sisters! I am working for a heavily male environment and struggle to get an equal pay. I’m working full time and getting my bachelor degree. Sometimes I feel like my candle is burning at both ends, but I also am blessed beyond belief for the few women that are in my company rooting me on and cheering for me. I keep thinking one day I’ll be done and be serene. I say this to myself every morning. Thank you for letting me in your group!!
I’m a teacher, again. The first time I burnt out in the Education field I got out by having a baby. This was not planned and I had already raised my older kids. Still it was a happy surprise, I wasn’t teaching, I got into shape, enjoyed raising my little one as a stay at home mom. I was healthy and that’s how I knew I had turned the corner. However, I earned another degree in education since then and felt I had to put it to good use. Unfortunately I’m starting to feel the burnout again and I’m looking to get into a new field altogether.
I have survived burnout. My path out was reflection, contemplation, self-healing, self-learning, yoga, stress reduction and stress management - by upping my organizational, prioritization and planning skills and applying them diligently and repeatedly to my personal life and circumstances. The last question is interesting and quite honestly I don't know, I eliminated tracking and measuring, I don't care and perhaps my learning and tip is don't measure and track everything - it adds to burnout and unnecessary work. Didn't know there were two nn's in unnecessary :-)
So that's how I know I've turned the corner - I'm genuinely genuine, I'm myself.
I found another role within my same company...or I should say it found me. I was fortunate that someone reached out to me in regards to another opportunity. I still felt the burnout until about 5 months into the new role, but it's much much better now.
User deleted comment on 01/26/20 at 1:17PM UTC