Anyone else feel this way?
I am staring turning 50 in the face and sometimes feel like I have not made it far enough. Especially when I start to think about past colleagues who are not only younger and started their "real jobs" after I did. I have recently reconnected with a similar aged colleague and he commented that he is surprised that I am not in a management role. While I appreciated his vote of confidence, it really did hit home.
It certainly hasn't been due to lack of trying. At a previous employer (tech company that even in 2022 is very much a boys club), I had 6 managers in my 8 year tenure. To me, this never allowed me to build a relationship with any manager to gain an advocate for career advancement, including continuing education; not even internally within the organization.
I work hard to protect my good reputation and am proud that people always ask to work with me, and fortunately this has continued to where I am today. Being matched to that mentor/advocate who truly want to "lift" me up though - I am still looking.
Lisa James
20
05/29/22 at 9:05PM UTC
I know how you feel. Because of my years of institutional knowledge, experience, and ability to quickly adapt, my assistance was requested by other departments that needed help, but could not hire anyone due to COVID. I felt proud that people had that much faith in me and I was happy to help, but now I feel kind of used up and tossed to the side. I guess good guys do finish last.
Shauna Rumbaugh
133
07/10/22 at 1:51AM UTC
This is exactly how I’ve been feeling lately. The reward for hard work and competence is just more work.
Anonymous
04/21/22 at 8:26PM UTC
I turned 50 this year and it has hit HARD. I feel you. This is not the life I saw for myself. It is great - I have a wonderful home, a loving husband, an amazing daughter...but things did not go as planned.
I try to forgive myself for not being where I expected and just keep trying to be the best that I can be now. But it's challenging and you are definitely not alone. I wish you the best. xoxo
Randi LevinLegacy catalyst, decision diva & pivot partner
258
04/17/22 at 6:30PM UTC
Sounds like a good time for you to redefine success. That is your starting point.
Anonymous
04/16/22 at 2:40AM UTC
Also don't forget that the average age of success is much older than most people think, 45 and beyond. The young genius doesn't exist, its an anomaly. Most famous people we know of didn't achieve career advancement until well past 40. And also at this age we are bad ass. Smart, wise, strategic.
ReachingGoals
1.9k
04/15/22 at 9:35PM UTC
Congratulations on turning 50! It is actually an awesome age, there is something freeing about it. Enjoy
Erin Pett
232
04/15/22 at 6:22PM UTC
A - You have to learn to advocate for yourself, even good managers don't necessarily push you forward without you reminding them to.
B - Don't compare your journey to anyone else's. Great workers don't necessarily make great managers, and vice versa. Personally, I never wanted the politics or the pressure that comes from the exec levels.
C - Be careful that you're employer isn't holding you back because you are TOO good of an employee and it would be expensive to back fill you into that role.
Amy Edmonds
2.17k
04/15/22 at 4:55PM UTC
Just because sexism & ageism are illegal doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
And then we are in a bind - if we file a complaint, we risk retaliation. Retaliation is also illegal, but if a company or supervisor doesn't care about one law, why would they care about others?
The "corporate ladder" is an upside-down funnel, and it's not always necessary to "advance" to a job in management from a job in a technical area. Management is a completely different job, requiring different skills and a different personality type. Is it really a job that you want to do?
If you just like doing what you do, perhaps doing some volunteer work will set you up with a portfolio for launching a consulting career.
Dr. Trelaunda Beckett-Jones Transformational Leader, Wife, Mom of Multiples
126
04/15/22 at 3:57PM UTC
Many people have written similar comments to what I would say to you. So, let me just encourage you. YOU are at the right space, at the right time. Everyone, especially women, have their own journeys. From my own experience and the research I conducted on women in leadership, your feelings, experience and journey is quite common in “the life of womanhood” . Many women have sacrificed their time and put their goals and dreams on hold to raise children, be caregivers, etc. It’s never too late to go out there and obtain what you want. You will be rewarded for every sacrifice you have made regarding your life’s journey. Ignore the naysayers and keep pushing forward. Your FGB Family will always be here to encourage you, inspire you, motivate you and push you to your greatness! YOU got this! Remember, YOU are at the right space at the right time! Onward & upward!
Desiree JohnsonAgile Business Systems Analyst in Louisville
36
04/15/22 at 12:52PM UTC
People have their own journeys in the workforce. I chose not to go into management until my children were in high school. I wanted to be able to be a more hands on mom. Now I'm facing 45 and and hoping to become a manager at some point before 50. Don't judge your journey with others. Every path is different.
