Ladies, I need career advice please.
I’ve been at my current role/company as Engineering Manager for 6 months (have been in engineering for 15+ years and EM for the last 3-4). Love the company values and the product, but I don’t like the culture within the engineering organization (about 400 people).
The culture here put all the emphasis on hard skills and does not care about people skills. When you join, you are expected to “prove yourself” technically before your team or peers respect you. They don’t care that in order to get hired you already passed a brutal selection process with multiple technical screens, so if you made it, you’re good.
This is a huge company, in rapid growth, amazing benefits and good pay. But, I’m having a really hard time fitting in and thriving here. I don’t feel the need to prove myself to anyone, but the pressure is there. My boss expects me to engage in passionate technical debates and refute complex architectural designs all while I have a disengaged, passive aggressive team that only cares about producing code and sees everything else as a waste of time.
Recently, a startup approached me with a job opportunity. Although I wasn’t looking, I agreed to interview and now I have an offer on the table.
Part of me feels like a failure for considering leaving a job after only 6 months and without having “earned” the respect from my team or peers.
The new company sounds exciting, it’s smaller with less politics, but of course it is a risk, grass is not always greener in the other side.
I’m confused and frustrated and would love to hear any thoughts or similar experiences you may have had.
You're not a failure - the culture in that place sounds horrific. Screw it, if the culture isn't going to change then you will be "proving" yourself for years with no let up, sounds like torture to me.
Grass might not be greener, but will it be less green?
Repeating this but you are not a failure!! I would make sure you've really investigated the startup's culture before you make the jump because you're right, the grass isn't always greener. But if you're sure it's what you want and will be a better fit then go for it - don't let the thought of "failure" keep you at a job you don't enjoy.
You are definitely NOT a failure. Sometimes the job isn't the right fit for any number of reasons.
Is there another way you can try to engage your team? If you've already tried everything and nothing's happening, it may be time to move on.