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Anonymous
06/25/20 at 2:02AM UTC
in
Career

I Am Quitting My Job Without A New One!

Hi Ladies! It's been a while since I've been on this forum. I have been in, what I and many of my peers who understand my employment position feel is, an emotionally abusive relationship with my boss. I work under a VP for a community bank. I am held to an extremely high standard and have produced quality work under mounds of pressure from working so closely with executives. I was excited about my position when I got it because I had worked so hard to go from part time teller to an analyst for a member of upper management. I increased my salary over 30% in the span of 5 years. I should be screaming from the mountaintops that I am making ~$60k a year with just an associate's degree (still pursuing bachelor's). My job pays for my tuition, I have healthcare and a 401k. I am very privileged to be in my position especially with COVID-19, however, I also worked extremely hard to get here and feel in my heart that I need to leave. I could go on and on with examples but my boss has no consideration for anyone but herself. I am basically running my entire department with no oversight from her because she doesn't even know what I do and is never there when I need her mentorship. I CONSTANTLY have to show her the same basic functions of the computer, like looking up an extension or saving a file (!!!!). I feel like staying in this situation is going to stunt my growth. I am almost 30 and desperately want to learn/keep up with the times in my job - but I can not do that here because we flat out do not have the technology or training resources. I could teach myself, and I do, but if I can't use these tools at work then I am wasting my time. I have been looking on and off for 2 years and have had no luck getting a new job. Since COVID, plus the current climate of the world right now regarding the injustices Black Americans are still facing, I feel so insignificant doing the work that I do. I am not helping anyone and that is where my heart is. I need to be doing something I am passionate about. The company culture is very conservative, so I have to listen to covertly racist comments between my bosses and I am just at a place where I feel like I can no longer contribute to the success of people who display the moral compass they have. I have been talking to my therapist about quitting without another job and the more I consider it the more free I feel. I never wanted to leave without having a new one but I am at a breaking point of burnout, mentally exhausted and at a place where the fear of the unknown sounds less scary and stressful than my current position. I have some funds in my 401k I could dip into as a last resort, am receiving a federal student loan of ~$13k and currently have $0 in student loan debt, so my tuition is taken care of, and I have paid off all my credit cards in preparation of my departure. I am registered to walk dogs under the Wag service (basically uber for dogs) and have done some bartending on the side for over 7 years, so I figured if I needed to walk some dogs or pickup a few extra shifts after COVID has calmed down, I am ready and willing. I want to have more time to finish college. I am only taking 2 classes at a time because working full time and going to school is hard. I have a 4.0 and want to keep it that way! My plan is to quit my job, take as many classes a semester that I can, and pursue a career in my current major, Graphic Design. I would love to have the freedom to work as a creator for a corporation or even freelance work and possibly continue my education in law school after I receive my bachelor's. I have never experienced feeling like I was "called for" for a profession until I explored becoming a lawyer. My childhood friend who currently works as a lawyer for the DA gave me the push when she noticed my advocacy for BLM and suggested I would make a great lawyer. It's not what I was originally going for but I have never felt so compelled to go down that path, and education is how I will get there. Sorry I kind of strayed - but I need to finish school so I can pursue my real dreams. The existential dread of my current situation is depressing me to the core and I am at the point of burnout where I just do not care. I have been dealing with "burnout" for over 2 years and I have broken. I'm having my "leaving town with $5 to my name and am gonna make it big" moment and what I'm saying is, for anyone out there feeling the same, HAVE YOURS TOO! (but in a well organized way) Never in my WILDEST dreams did I think I would quit my job without another one lined up, but after discussing my terrible experiences at work for months with my therapist and finally proposing the idea of quitting without a job, she made me realize that I am fortunate enough to organize a plan to where I can be financially secure for at least 6 months to a year without working at all, and have backup plans to generate extra cash if needed. I don't have a date for when I intend to leave, but decided to take the steps to be ready to give notice at any moment and just continue to work ands save money until the time comes where I literally break down. If you're feeling like you can't do this anymore, line up your options. Pay off your debt so you have a clean slate and less bills. Decide what's not important (i.e. cancelling cable), have a backup plan for extra cash (uber bike/car deliveries, freelance work, etc.), evaluate your non-liquid savings and determine the penalties/fees for early withdrawals as an emergency plan. Discuss your plan with your roommate(s) or significant other and have a clear agreement and mutual understanding between anyone who may be impacted by your financial status and ensure you are protecting yourself as well as others. I am lucky to have a supportive boyfriend who I currently make more money than, but can count on to cover some of my share of bills for a while. I have committed to always having funds to pay rent (my half of rent is $9,300/yr and I can tap into funds totaling ~$20k). I was never privileged enough to have my parents regularly fund my education or housing, but talk to family about your situation. Can they loan you a month or two of rent if needed? Can they drop off some food to cut down on costs? Rely on your support system - it's OK to ask for help as long as you are doing the right things to help yourself and are clear and communicating consistently. I am restricting my spending habits, I have ensured I have everything I need at the moment and do not have major expenses, and have never felt so sure about a decision in my life. One thing I will note is that I am lucky to be in NYC and do not need to/care to drive, so if you have a car I would make extra plans regarding how you can fund the maintenance that a car requires. If you're like me and are *over* the end of your rope, putting these plans in place now will save you for the next time you feel like just walking out of the door but can't because of financial obligations. Having the plan in place also means tying any loose ends at work that you are responsible for, because while you may be miserable, you should NEVER burn a bridge and always give appropriate notice (in my beliefs anyway). If I was about to be homeless, I would call up my current employer and try to get a retail banking job back, and I wouldn't have that option if I up and left in smoke. However, one thing is for sure: I cannot wait for the day when I give my two weeks. And when asked where I found a job, I can't wait for the look on their face when I reveal that I haven't found a new job - I have found myself.

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Veena Joji
star-svg
36
Senior HR professional
07/01/20 at 5:13AM UTC
Living in a toxic environment is not good for your mental well being and if even the thought of leaving is making you feel lighter, then you already know that's the best decision. I myself did it but let me tell you quitting without a job is not for the fainthearted! - You will need to be well prepared and organized about your plans as finding an alternate job might not be easy in today's time. So, once you move out, make sure you invest in healing and educating yourself for the next best opportunity. Take care and all the best!
Anonymous
06/30/20 at 8:03PM UTC
You certainly have a much better plan than I had when I quit my job without another one in line. Congratulations! Good luck on your new journey!
Kathleen O
star-svg
120
Registered Financial Adviser for women.
06/26/20 at 12:57PM UTC
Good luck to you! Please keep in touch with updates. I would love to hear how things are working for you when you depart on your new adventure.
Anonymous
06/26/20 at 12:57AM UTC
You have persuaded me! You have planned meticulously for leaving your current job and this is a good time to be in school. Here is to your success! Congratulations! One suggestion: if law school is your ultimate dream, consider taking some courses that would relate to that interest, if you are able.
Anonymous
06/27/20 at 3:51AM UTC (Edited)
thank you! best of luck with your journey! and great recommendation about law related classes, was totally in my plan and i've got some american law and philosophy classes under my belt (philosophy will help with reasoning).
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 2:57PM UTC (Edited)
Just a tidbit for any naysayers: I am not asking if it's a good idea. I am not asking for approval. I know my worth, I know where my head is, I know how to take care of myself and I know my heart. I am not looking for permission, I am trying to inspire others who think they should settle and remain in a dead end position to make room for the change they are craving.
User deleted comment on 06/25/20 at 2:13PM UTC
User deleted comment on 06/25/20 at 2:11PM UTC
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 1:28PM UTC
I will be the lone dissenter, it sounds like the move of an immature and spoiled child. Leave your job, empty your savings and live off student loans? In this economy? Please do not complain when you can't pay your bills 5 years from now because you got a fancy degree with loans and are working in a job that doesn't pay the bills. Check out the ROI on a law degree these days. Sorry if this sounds old school, but you have NO IDEA how lucky you are to work for an employer who pays for all those benefits. If you were my daughter and told me this was your plan I would let you know that I won't rescue you when your homeless or your credit score is in the trash and you want to buy a home. You are almost THIRTY! Be a grown up, no one loves their job, we have jobs to pay for our houses and our vacations. Oh the big people are mean, that's life it doesn't matter your race or your gender, your job is to help the VP, that is what your are paid handsomely for! Your boss isn't there to be your cheerleader, they are there to make money fo the bank, your job is to do whatever they ask, that's life. Honestly, this post is exactly what us older people expect from the younger generation and makes us shake our heads. Sorry if this sounds harsh, we are just sick of hearing complaints you can't afford your loans or to buy a house when you want to leave a well paying job just because the boss isn't a mentor or a friend.
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 2:35PM UTC (Edited)
Wow you have no idea about my current situation. I am in an emotionally abusive relationship at work. Did you miss the part where I said I have backup plans to generate cash? Also I'm sick of teaching an older generation that makes 6 figures how to turn on a computer when they turn around and preach that you have to adapt to the times in the same breath. Sorry you never took risks in your life, Karen. How did that work out? Plenty of people love what they do and I refuse to settle. Life is way more than paying bills and vacations. I will not be jobless for 5 years. I am not impulsively quitting I am putting a plan in place and what I do with my hard earned savings is none of your business. No one is spoiled or entitled. I have worked very hard and came from a place where everything I earned came from myself and NO ONE has bailed me out. I will not be asking my mom to bail me out so your "if you were my daughter" is null and void. Also way to hide behind the anonymous feature. I'm hiding so I protect my identity at my job while expressing my feelings. You're hiding for other reasons. Have a great life! You must also have missed the part where I stated I have no student debt and am almost done with my bachelors. I will find a job doing what I love and I cannot do that in a place where I am mentally. Sorry you never had that faith in yourself but I wish you the best.
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 3:10PM UTC
You specifically said you have a $13K student loan, Do make sure you check the clawback clause in your employers handbook, they may take back the money they have paid for your degree. You can call me names all you want, those of us who are older and more experienced in life know a thing or two and can offer you advice, but I can tell you don't want to hear it, you know everything! PS - life lesson for your career, make all of your social media posts anonymous, bosses look at all of this stuff regardless of who you are how justified you feel as an SJW. I don't have a social media account that is actually linked to my name or title other than LinkedIn and I only post career related articles there.
User deleted comment on 06/25/20 at 3:27PM UTC
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 3:25PM UTC
yeah - a $13k student loan i haven't received yet but will use it for my upcoming education. I did not call you names but you did call me immature and childish. And don't worry - I have checked and they are not entitled to take my money back. I am so sorry you settled for a job that just pays the bills but I have more plans in mind for myself. Just because you are older does not mean you are smarter. Stop weaponizing your age.
User deleted comment on 06/25/20 at 5:07AM UTC
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 5:24AM UTC (Edited)
I 100% agree! I even discussed going back to work part-time so I can still focus on school. I am open to options and the type that can really adapt to the situation. Excellent point about feeling out the culture! Another risk I am cautious of is finding another opportunity just to be stuck in a similar situation.
Debbie Mason
star-svg
74
Passionate in design, communication & connection
06/25/20 at 2:23AM UTC (Edited)
Oh my gosh, you are my spelling out my shero dreams right now! I cannot WAIT to walk out of my current job. It's been draining my soul for a year and a half now. I've suffered under 3 horrible managers, although looking back, the first one (who hired me) was the better one, on a personal level. I'm nearly done with my Bachelor's. Like you, I worked while I accomplished it. I need to keep saving and cutting my spending so I can make a leap and find something new.
Anonymous
06/25/20 at 2:31AM UTC (Edited)
I know the feeling of horrible managers! I wrote this blog post because I am such a hard worker that the thought of quitting my job without another offer lined up that had a better culture, better pay or benefits than what I have now never even crossed my mind as possible. But the more I thought about it, it was like an awakening. Things have a way of falling into place and we all have our gut feeling of when the time is right for us to take a risk. I wish you all the best on your journey!

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