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Anonymous

05/18/20 at 9:59PM UTC

Lifestyle & Relationships

Giving up on social distancing?

For some reason, it feels like so many people I know broke their quarantine this weekend. Has anyone else experienced this? I've seen so many posts of people meeting up with their friends and family. Some are changing their quarantine locations and moving in with others. Even if it's technically safe, it doesn't feel like something to brag about! I feel infuriated that I've kept a very strict quarantine while others are out and about. Even if they're safe, some people don't have the privilege to move to another location. How should I curb my anger? Am I overreacting?

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Flour

264

I worked it out

05/20/20 at 10:56PM UTC

GOODness no, you are not overreacting. Many of us following guidelines are getting very frustrated at those who are not. I am a chef for our homeless community, how I handle it is by doing what we are told to do, cleaning, distance, mask, and making it normal for their cook to be looking like this, and respecting the law. Respect is what it boils down to for me. I respectfully let my coworkers vent these same triggers on me, I understand and we just encourage each other in that we are doing the right thing. Those without masks who try to get closer as I walk backward away, they do not respect me, my ability to live, I can do nothing about it. I can only protect others from me and tell mask-wearers how much I love the design of their mask. I spend 3 days in town, in public, 8am1pm, mask on, glove on, Tuesday I make groceries for home and work, work, go home. On days off, I am home taking advantage of not putting things off, and I text people once very couple weeks (my group of friends and co-workers, we don't change so we do not keep in touch but every 3-4 weeks. My best friend lives in another state, I text her a sunset picture every night since the end of march, and have to support her going back to work as a nanny for a compromised person, who, she herself and her daughter are compromised as well- but she has two kiddos to feed and school alone, so I understand she is frustrated too, but just does the best she can. (((hugs))) You will get through this and you will respect yourself for what you did to keep people alive. Thank you for your service to this crazy situation we all find ourselves working around right now.

Anonymous

05/28/20 at 1:14AM UTC

Thank you so so much for sharing this perspective!! What you're doing is so important.

Heather Denniston

333

05/20/20 at 3:27AM UTC

I know that can be very hard. The only thing we can come back to is what we have influence over. How you carry out recommendations, how you and your family respond and how you self-care through the stressful and difficult time. Big breathe. Everyone is going to do this much differently from each other and I think the re-entry is going to be the most polarizing of everything that is happened so far. Sending you love.

Anonymous

05/20/20 at 8:36PM UTC

Thank you, Heather. This is so sweet and I really appreciate it.

Krista Coutts

336

Marketing Professional, Cross-Functional Leader

05/19/20 at 6:51PM UTC

Nope, you're not overreacting...BUT, at some point we all need some interaction. As someone who lives alone with my dog, I miss interaction with my family and friends so much! BUT...taking the necessary precautions to stay safe. My advice...stay away from the folks who are breaking protocol and make sure to take care of YOU!

Anonymous

05/20/20 at 8:36PM UTC

Thank you, Bella! You've inspired me to do a little self care :)

Jackie Ghedine

5.77k

Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans

05/19/20 at 10:28AM UTC

I'm in New York and my family and our closest friends have been extremely strict during quarantine. We haven't socialized at all, we walk or bike as a family and stay far away from others. We feel it is our responsibility to be respectful to those on the front lines, giving their lives so we can have ours. While we don't agree with the decisions others are making, it's their choice as adults. We have no control over those choices. The reason why we feel even more angered is because Fairness is one of the core modalities that create our fight or flight to go off and it is being triggered at every turn. The only thing we can control is how we respond to their actions (or don't respond). Try to find a way to release the anger and annoyance and keep in mind why YOU decided to stay put and do what's right.

Anonymous

05/20/20 at 8:35PM UTC

Thank you, Jackie! It's hard to not focus on others, but you're right. We can only control ourselves and our reactions!

Clydene H

217

Passionately helping customers & succeed.

05/19/20 at 3:20AM UTC

I understand where you are coming from. We’ve been pretty strict here as well. However, there comes a point where responsible, in-person meetings are necessary to the overall well-being of individuals. This is more true for some than others. The key is to do it as safely as possible by practicing good hygiene, wearing masks, keeping your distance, small group size, etc. The risk of being cooped up for some is depression, suicide, physical harm to yourself or someone else or by someone else. We recently allowed our daughter to visit her best friend with the caveat that they stay outside, wear masks, and keep at least six feet apart. She came home a new person who was more able to cope with online schooling, canceled prom, delayed graduation, the potential to miss out on her senior dance recital, and applying for the honors program and the dance program at her college for next year. Given our family history of depression and anxiety, this was a necessary risk metered with appropriate caution. We’re all wearing different shoes as we trudge through this mess and hopefully everyone is doing his or her best. Stay safe!

Anonymous

05/20/20 at 8:35PM UTC (Edited)

Thank you for this perspective! Social interaction is definitely vital to our wellbeing and mental health, and I hope everyone can do so safely.

LEANNE TOBIAS

4.09k

Investment real estate/sustainability

05/19/20 at 2:30AM UTC

On those who are moving in with others: that is their choice and privilege. Don’t begrudge them. On those who are socializing on warm days: yes, they are potentially endangering others and that is harmful and selfish. That said, the danger can be mitigated considerably if: -Everyone is wearing a mask. -The meeting is outdoors. -Physical distancing (6+ feet) is maintained. Hong Kong has had an extremely low CoViD-19 death rate, although the island is densely populated and heavily dependent on public transportation. That is because virtually everyone is masked in public. On keeping yourself balanced during quarantine: -Stay in touch with friends and family on social media. -Wear a mask and go outside for exercise on sunny days. Keep 6+ feet from people outside your immediate household. -From the Yale Happiness Course on coping with CoViD-19: Have compassion for yourself and others. Lower your expectations of others. Have as much fun as possible while quarantining.