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Triggered at Work - Found out Some Information
I have recently acquired a new position and while I'm happy to be back doing things related to my degree, I also am encountering multiple issues with my new work place.
For one, there is a LOT of mismanagement and miscommunication. I was told about a new project today and that *someone else* wanted to set up a meeting with me. This person did not call me, text me, or email me to let me know they wanted a meeting. I found out from a colleague.
2. I found out some unfavorable things about the CEO. I found out that he regularly yells at and threatens to fight employees. The company is manual labor and I understand that while I am female I won't experience the brunt of the anger, but I still do not think this is acceptable. I understand this is a man's business, but this honeslty scares the crap out of me. I know at some point I will do something wrong and I will get yelled at, but I fear that every day is my last day.
I keep getting told by my colleagues to "Not make the CEO mad". And "just wait until you see the CEO mad." "Don't put your feet up on the chair because if the CEO sees that, he'll get mad and fire you." I feel like I'm working in a dictatorship and I'm constantly on edge that I'm going to miss something and end up getting fired as a result. It's a small company so no one really has the guts to stand up to him and tell him that his behavior isn't okay. I've seen emails between him and the previous marketing coordinator and it was one of the most scathing things I've ever read in my life.
I have PTSD and the CEO reminds me of my father. It doesn't help that all of these rumors are reminding me of him and leaves me triggered.
I have a lot of jumps in my resume from last year because I was underpaid and dealt with really toxic bosses that borderline abused me so I had no choice but to seek other employment. I have no idea how to proceed.
My current strategy is to just do my job and make sure I work there 6-12 months before looking for another job.
I want to stay at least 6 months but I am thinking that I might have to leave before then. Any advice on what to do?
Lisa Leslie Hefter
Banking professional
226
01/14/20 at 2:42PM UTC
I would role play ahead of time how you would/will react if you experience the CEOs anger. If you can’t see yourself saying anything constructive in that moment, silence is sometimes the best approach. You can also talk to co-workers to see if your CEO responds better to one type of response, I feel like planning ahead can help you when the stressor occurs. I would also try to build a friendly relationship with the CEO, if possible. Don’t avoid the CEO, because often familiarity helps with domineering bosses.
Deauna GibbsComms pro to UI/UX
26
01/14/20 at 1:36PM UTC
I'm sorry you're feeling like this in your work environment and hope you have resources to get help to deal with it while you finalize an exit strategy.
Are there any reputable placement agencies where you live? I found at least three of my previous positions using an agency for temp-hire work when I was between jobs. It could be a faster process than applying for positions through job sites and networking if you are worried every day is your last.
LEANNE TOBIASInvestment real estate/sustainability
4.05k
01/08/20 at 2:08AM UTC
I hope that you are getting treatment for your PTSD. A therapeutic setting is the best place to discuss the triggering that you are experiencing.
It’s excellent and insightful that you can make the connection between your family history and the behavior of the CEO, provided that you refrain from unhealthy engagement.
I would suggest that you strive to distance yourself from the dysfunction in your workplace by remembering that you are there to do a job, that this workplace is not your family of origin and that the CEO is not your father.
Your best defense is to maintain a professional distance from your colleagues and to avoid getting sucked into any workplace drama. Focus on doing your job well, not on correcting the errors of colleagues or discussing the behavior of the CEO.
If you wish to move on in a year’s time, start looking for a new position around month 6. For the moment, concentrate on building your professional skills.
Anonymous
01/08/20 at 2:53AM UTC
I'm trying hard to remember that, but also at the same time, it's a little hard to focus when everyone talks about him all the time.
We typically don't chat very often. Usually we only meet up once or twice a month. I have a direct manager that I report to so I don't need to see the CEO as much. As the only marketing person, I feel like there's a lot of pressure on me to be informed on what's going on in the company so I am informed of everything that's happening.
I keep having to remind myself that this job is a stepping stone and not my career. I need to do a good job here in order to make sure it doesn't count against me.
But I also don't want to put myself in a position where I'd be losing my mind because my anxiety is through the roof because the CEO is yelling at me constantly.
I'm going to therapy and have an appointment next week actually. I'm going to bring this up with my therapist and see what she says I should do.
Marcia Santelli Jones
13
01/08/20 at 3:12AM UTC
I'm finding much success with just 10 mins. of yoga 2x per day. Another new habit of mine is using various frequency sounds, which has been backed by science to positively impact our stress while we sleep. I found several on Utube under manifesting peace sound videos. Those are the words I place in search bar. I feel
amazing after just one week of incorporating my two new tasks to my daily routine.
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