Feedback | Fairygodboss

Mystery Woman

Tell us more for better jobs, advice
and connections

Don’t miss out on new opportunities.

Update your profile

YOUR TOPICS

Your feed isn’t personalized yet. Follow topics like career advice, lifestyle or health.

YOUR GROUPS

Discover and join groups with like-minded women who share your interests, profession, and lifestyle.

COMPANIES YOU FOLLOW

Get alerted when there are new employee reviews.

YOUR JOB ALERTS

Get notified when new jobs are posted.

Your post is published!

Anonymous

11/17/20 at 1:56AM UTC

Career

Feedback

What is the most useful feedback (either positive or negative) that has helped you progress in your career?

24 Comments

Carolyn A

222

11/17/20 at 2:23AM UTC

Many things 1) To seek to understand your manager - to get to know their preferred working style, what they want from you so you work in synergy. 2) be a part of the solution not the problem 3) to have a neutral facial expression at meetings. A mgr once told me years ago I "rolled my eyes" when people said stupid things...I was mortified..though very grateful to be told (we had an excellent working relationship). 4) be flexible to work with different types of people and ask questions to understand what they do. A better understanding makes things go smoother. 5) I'm not a ruthless political brown-noser. I won't throw anyone under the bus and won't be that person who ruins a colleague's experience. I was told to do this and refused.

User edited comment on 11/17/20 at 2:31AM UTC

Anonymous

11/17/20 at 3:40AM UTC

Years ago in an early stage of leadership, I was called a "bitch in sheep's clothing" as a way to describe my overuse of patience which would then cause me to get agitated when I would be taken advantage of. Over the years I have never forgotten it, and use it as my compass still - to set and reset boundaries using much more candor up front. Fair and consistent always wins from the beginning, rather than trying too hard to undo something I created myself by not setting them in the first place.

D Serke

11/17/20 at 4AM UTC

Don't respond to an email right away in anger. Type it, then let it sit overnight. Most times you'll be glad you gave yourself time to cool off and can proceed with a more thoughtful response. Also, if it's important, face to face (or video call) is the best way to tackle an issue with a coworker.

Anonymous

11/17/20 at 9:11PM UTC

One I learned late(r) in my career that I wished I’d channeled sooner was “ignore the noise.” That is, not to ignore feedback, but to be able to distinguish between helpful feedback v. hurtful. And — then to calm the inner critic / not let the feedback hold you back. I think this gets even more important the further in your career, where feedback tends to be more on leadership styles, communication and less technical and therefore feels more personal.

Celeste Baranski

11/17/20 at 9:50PM UTC

I got three pieces of advice that helped me as I moved up in management (from an engineer to VP of engineering): - Stop micromanaging and learn to delegate. Being a detail oriented engineer, this was hard for me, but it was essential for me to let go of the details and trust the people working for me to take care of them. - Hire people that are better than you. This is a cliche, but I have found it to be a very important piece of advice when building a strong, successful team. I think most people have a slight inclination to be jealous of really smart, accomplished people (I know I do!) but I always tried to ignore this and hire people I thought could eventually outshine me, especially in areas that weren't my strengths. - As you move up in management, realize the power of your words and be thoughtful in what you say, even in casual settings with work colleagues. A couple of times I made what I thought was a funny, sarcastic comment and it really came back and bit me. Always think before you talk (or write an email, or a text).

Alyssa Kleinman

11/17/20 at 10:12PM UTC

One of the best pieces of advice I have been given is to actively seek and be open to feedback. Understanding how you are performing and how you are being perceived help form the foundation for how you can grow throughout your career.

Talya

Generalist, but in a good way

11/17/20 at 10:17PM UTC

Here are a few: - Managing up is as important as managing down - The salary will follow the title, which will follow your R&R. If you want to do something or see yourself in a new role, make it happen and the rest will follow - This is especially true for cross functional management, but not only: people do what’s easy for them. If you need them to do something else you have to make it crystal clear and don’t leave any room for interpretation.

Krista Coutts

289

Marketing Professional, Cross-Functional Leader

11/17/20 at 10:23PM UTC

Be true to your values!

Monique Aduddell

249

11/17/20 at 10:34PM UTC

These observations are a tribute to my former dean - for whom it was an absolute joy to work. This person's management style was laissez faire and once you proved yourself the sky was the limit. 1. Pick your battles. 2. If you mess up, inform your manager immediately and come to the meeting with a solution. 3. Do not ever put your manager in a position of being blindsided by their peers based on a significant error you've made that everyone knows about but your manager. And for good measure, don't ever divulge something that you wish to remain a secret.

Anonymous

11/18/20 at 12:20AM UTC

A really great piece of feedback I got early in my career was to set goals and advocate for myself to show others my value.

Rebecca Vorwerk Larson

Called to communicate.

11/18/20 at 4:10AM UTC

After college I went on an interview for a technical writing position. Half-way through the interview, the person interviewing me stopped and said, "I'm ending this interview." Of course I was shocked and asked him why? He said, "clearly you do not want to be a technical writer. I'm not going to waste your time or mine continuing an interview with someone who is not passionate about this job." He wasn't angry or curt. He said those words kindly. But they still stung. I was mortified. I left the interview embarrassed and confused. However, I look back on that moment now and see how that man did me a huge favor. He saw something in me that I didn't see clearly yet in myself, and he kept me from taking a job that would've been a bad fit for me. The experience was jarring, but it forced me to go back and reevaluate what I really did want out of a job and instilled a new determination in me to find the right job for me, not just the first thing I could possibly squeeze my skills into. Several months later, I was offered an amazing job at a publishing house where I stayed for 13 wonderful years. So I guess the advice was, make sure you are actually doing work that you're passionate about and that is a good fit for you. Just because you can do a job doesn't mean you should. And realize sometimes a rejection is the best thing that could ever happen to you.

User edited comment on 11/18/20 at 4:11AM UTC

Susie Kendis

Helping leaders out-perform against their goals

11/18/20 at 5:09AM UTC

-take things off your boss’ plate so that they appreciate you and you get to learn a more senior job -identify the “center of power” within an organization and get as close to it as you can by working with those decision makers or helping with special projects -help others to earn favors in return -be clear on asks vs directives -lead with empathy

Catie Gibbons

Admission Professional in Baltimore

11/18/20 at 2:17PM UTC

1. Never agree to the first offer of money when talking about a new job. Don't sell yourself short. Think on it. 2. Learn how to manage up.

Avery Lucas

Social and Digital Marketing at David Yurman

11/18/20 at 4:28PM UTC

Managing up is just as important as managing yourself or direct reports.

Janet Granger

Consultant/Author/Speaker

11/18/20 at 8:56PM UTC

Positive advice: very early on in my career, my boss told me to be sure to "duplicate" myself - and to not be fearful of teaching others what I do. That's the only way to "move up," he said. And he was right - once I because "indispensable" I went nowhere. Negative: another boss told me that I sometimes got a "tone" to my voice that wasn't good - other people resented it. I wasn't even aware of it so it was a great (but painful) piece of advice. It was hard to learn that it's not necessarily what you say - it's how you say it. Or, in the words of Maya Angelou, "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

stephanie brown

Strategic Kaizen Leader

11/18/20 at 10:45PM UTC

Ask for what you want!

Shanita Taylor

195

Author, Leadership Certified & Medical Ins. Tech

11/19/20 at 12:26AM UTC

Something as simple as come to work on time.

K Clare Johnson

I tell the story of your company

11/19/20 at 4:54PM UTC

I was once told that I came from a "place of no." I did some thinking about it, and while having a critical eye is important (It can help find errors before they happen, or curtail projects that simply aren't feasible), I did start saying "Why not?" to myself when presented with a project or idea. It's made me more flexible in terms of types of work I take on, and given me more confidence that I can learn to do new things that seem impossible to achieve at first glance.

Kristina Cabezas

PM Mom Looking to Make an Impact

11/19/20 at 6PM UTC

I don't know what your specific profession is, but I think these two sentiments should apply regardless: 1) Don't be too hard on yourself. Nobody knows everything. Nobody knows what they don't know. Everybody makes mistakes, and everybody needs help at multiple times throughout their careers. It's tough as a woman since we are often stigmatized for needing help or showing insecurity, but recognizing when you need support and owning your mistakes makes you a stronger asset for any organization. 2) Always remember that companies are made up of people and exist to serve people in some way shape or form whether that's to provide a product/service, create utility, support day-to-day living, whatever. People who have their own personalities, agendas, goals, responses and perspectives. Go about your job with a human-centered focus and that will enable you to get the best out of your subordinates and serve your clients and customers well. Hope that helps! Good luck.

User edited comment on 11/19/20 at 6:02PM UTC

Anonymous

11/21/20 at 3:16PM UTC

I had two great leaders that basically gave the same best advice. Not to overthink what others are thinking, believe in yourself, because you are in this position because you got yourself there. Had to hear it twice for it to sink in! Best career advice I received!

Anne Matsushita

11/22/20 at 5:14PM UTC

Good question! 1) Figure out what you can live with. If someone does a presentation using black font but you prefer blue, is this worth making a big deal over? If you're good with the content, let it go. If you feel strongly about it though, speak up. You have to pick your battles - everything isn't worth your time and energy. 2) Not everything needs to be perfect. Sometimes "good enough" is enough to keep things moving, and can be updated later if needed.

Kyra Bergman

11/24/20 at 2:55AM UTC

A supervisor once told me that I was “all business” and I needed to focus on building personal relationships with co-workers. That advice turned out to be very valuable when I was up for a promotion on another team and needed to build trust and relationships very quickly to prove I could lead. We may get so focused on the job that we forget the people around us. Take the time to ask about a co-worker’s spouse or kids. Attend a happy hour with your team (either in person or virtually). It can change how they see you and open doors you didn’t realize were closed.

Nicole Ferry

Partner in a NY brand and digital firm

11/24/20 at 2:22PM UTC

A client I worked with had a saying -- "Feedback is a blessing." I find myself using that phrase all the time with my clients, prospects and colleagues. There is no way to improve without thoughtful feedback, but it is much easier for people not to give it. So you have to ask. If you find that you get platitudes or vague input in return, think of more specific questions to ask, and try to ask them when they are relevant and top-of-mind. E.g., after a presentation, ask your manager or peer one thing you could have done differently. One of my colleagues asks for "sandwich" feedback since she knows she can feel devastated if feedback is too negative -- one thing during a certain scenario she did well, one thing she can improve upon, and another thing she did well. You will find that once you ask, and you are open to the feedback, people will be more likely to feel comfortable giving it. It truly is a blessing -- understanding your strengths and growth areas is the fastest path for improving yourself and your career.

Sandra

11/24/20 at 5:51PM UTC

The most recent and best advice was to KEEP LEARNING and growing through webinars, books, articles, newsletters, etc. Keeping your mid agile with learning new things will help grow your knowledge base. It will also help keep the industry you are in or looking to enter stay fresh and relevant.