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Anonymous
11/12/21 at 1:18AM UTC

My work hours are 8am – 4pm.

We are fortunate enough to have great bosses who look after us and pay well, and we are never required to do over time.   My two bosses come into the office at different hours every day, depending on client meetings and other circumstances. Their starting times can range anywhere from 9:30am to 3:30pm.   My bosses have this habit of calling me into their offices anywhere from 3:30pm onwards to discuss work or documents. Now I don’t usually mind this, however I’m currently pregnant so the afternoon slump is real! Because of this I tend to tackle my large projects in the morning when I’m feeling fresh and save my less important tasks for after lunch.   Every day when I leave at my scheduled time of 4:00pm, I am literally walking out with my handbag, lunch bag, keys in my hand and my bosses either want to have a 15-minute conversation with me, or ask me work related questions.   Yesterday my boss came in at 3:30pm so half an hour before I was due to finish. It was just after 4:00pm when I was leaving and I said goodbye to him as I walked past his office. He called me back and decided to ask me work related questions. He does stuff like this regularly; he will also often say ‘that project you’re working on for Mr & Mrs Jones I’ve looked into it and etc…’   This really irritates me because it happens so often. I’m here for the preceding 8 hours and he wants to stop me from leaving at my scheduled finish time to have a conversation about work? Why could he not do that an hour earlier? If it is so important, send me an email or phone me and I can look into it.   By 4:00pm every day my computer is switched off and I’m mentally signed out for the day.   I’ve noticed when the other girls leave, they just say ‘’goodbye’ and walk past his office without making eye contact and giving him a chance to ask them anything. In their defense though, they have children and will be late for school pick up if they stay back beyond their scheduled finish times.   Any advice on how to handle this?

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Anonymous
11/22/21 at 9:52AM UTC
I had a manager who come stop by during the last 30min and ask questions for status updates or debrief of what happened that day. I told my boss I use the last 30minutes of my work day to wind down, put files, folders etc back to where they belong if I got it from a file cabinet or tidy up my desk. I also told her that since the last 30 minutes I usually wind down, any info or topics she discussed with me, I might forget since my mindset is preparing to leave and to have the conversation the next day. My boss stopped asking me questions during the last 30min and left me alone.
Carolyn Fields
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421
Instructional Designer and Author
11/17/21 at 7:47PM UTC
I had the same problem in reverse. I was the supervisor and got into work around 6 AM. This was so that I could get a jump on my work while it was quiet. Most of my direct reports started at 8 or 9 AM. At 3 PM, I was ready to go. Several days a week, one or more of my direct reports picked 3 PM to begin a conversation or ask a question. My solution was to say, "walk with me," as I continued toward my car. I would continue to walk and talk, loading my car and getting ready to leave. Usually, the other person lost interest in the topic once we hit the parking lot. If not, I just said, "I really need to leave. Let's take this up again tomorrow." I don't know if that would work with your boss, but it's worth a try. Also, is there another exit (even if it's farther away) that does not pass his office? Might be worth a try.
Anonymous
11/16/21 at 7:12PM UTC
Different angle here. Keep in mind once your kids are in school you are going to need alot of flexibility, so if you give them time now, they will remember it later. Document your days you stay late to use as time bargaining.
Anonymous
11/17/21 at 7:07PM UTC
Not necessarily, this does not always happen like this. Once they see you will work and work, they will continue without remembering your value.
Anonymous
11/21/21 at 11:55PM UTC
True, true! I know this scenario firsthand from years of dealing with supervisors who have selective memory.
Anonymous
11/16/21 at 12:53PM UTC
You can go in at like 3:40 (give him a few minutes to get settled) and say “I have to leave right at 4pm so I wanted to see if there was anything you needed to discuss before I leave”. If he says yes then discuss things and, after, ask him if he’d like you to set up a meeting everyday at 340 to go over things. If he says no to your initial question or to setting up daily meetings, then just sneak out at 4pm like everyone does lol. You’ve done your due diligence so it’s on him if he doesn’t have his sh*t together before 4pm. But I agree with everyone that you should stop saying bye when you leave.
BrandieFarmer
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13
prospective law student
11/16/21 at 5:03PM UTC
This is an extremely good suggestion-Beat him to it. Maybe he will bagger on later after a few about how she could be using that time for work. In which she can say what she'd notice and really express the sentiments behind her reasoning; as a strategy to tackle the issue that's bothering her, Afterall she states that she is pregnant and I can or any reasonable human can reason with her situation. By then she is depleted and in need of self-care is a perfect excuse or reason. Or it is a dilemma solved.
Aramis Salazar Gaudet
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18
11/16/21 at 3:14AM UTC
This used to happen to me all the time at a previous job. The answer is simple. Stop saying bye. I stopped and I would also go out of the office a different way. It may be rude but it’s also rude to make you stand there with all your belongings waiting to leave while they want to talk about work after you’re already clocked out. Or if you don’t want to just leave, set your things down and tell them you need to clock back in if they want you to talk about work and see how that flies.
Anonymous
12/09/21 at 8:11PM UTC
Yes, don't say bye, don't hover with your belongings. Worse, don't go into his office and start taking off your coat, putting down your bag, etc. In my case, my manager was an empty nester and complained that she couldn't get any work done during regular hours because of all the email she had to answer. She would be out of her office at meetings but also had a habit of prolonging the meetings with gossip and irrelevant topics. If a meeting was held at the end of the day, most people would scramble out the door with their stuff in minutes. But my cubicle was just outside her office, so she would come to visit and catch up, but mostly to socialize. I would stupidly give her my full attention and then have to stay a bit to catch up on the work I was hoping to complete before that day. Then I'd stay a little bit more, because my next train wasn't for another half hour etc. I put up with years of this and one day last year they laid me off unceremoniously... and she got promoted to Director!
surfnwrite
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404
11/16/21 at 2:48AM UTC
Also, why do you need to say goodbye? That's an invitation to be spoken to. Why not just walk past and be on your way? That's what you'd do if the door were closed, so pretend the door is closed. I've worked in many offices were people's door is near the main door and it is not expected nor recommended to say "Goodbye" every day on the way out. In a large office that would also be distracting.
JobSeeker60
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587
11/15/21 at 11:42PM UTC
If you're pregnant, I would leave it be. Soon enough, you'll have the same "excuse" the other mothers have and can beg out of late meetings by saying you've got to get the baby from the daycare/sitter/etc. by a certain time. It might be a disorganized boss or it might be a power play, but sometimes (especially when you know it's temporary), it's best to pick your battles. However, if you're really struggling right now and can't wait, why not take the bull by the horns and give them a call around 3 p.m. and say, "I just wanted to check in with you about..." or something to that effect. That might stem the last-minute meetings if you've gotten them up-to-speed on what you're working on.
Jaime
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11/15/21 at 11:19PM UTC
My instinct tells me to do as your teammates do and just shout "bye" as you're rushing by. If that doesn't help, I'd tell him that while you're happy to talk about anything he needs, you do have a hard out at the end of your shift but would be happy to set up a time earlier in the day to chat. Like others have said, don't give a reason actual excuse because that can easily be turned around on you.
Tara Lerman
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15
11/15/21 at 8:07PM UTC
Hi there! Not sure what your title is but coming from someone who is an Executive Assistant to Partners & an Office Manager, I get this all the time!!! However, there are a couple things to take into consideration 1st. Anywhere in your job spec did it state something like 8am-4pm with after hours as needed or expected? 2nd, are you salary or hourly? When you're salary, it's a bit different...no one i know that is on salary really goes exactly by the minute, to the clock. When its hourly/set wage then yes, I get that. I wouldn't be too aggressive with your approach esp if this a place you want to be at long term or a place you want to advance in position at bc you never want to look like a clock-watcher, but when you're pregnant, they need to respect you have your limits to your day. And I agree with everyone else here about suggesting a time to go over things. They may be hesitant to commit to a time bc they come in late, but tell them you can do it late afternoon at 3:45pm. But at least that 15 minutes is not an extra 15 but rather your last 15. And I also agree with just slipping out the door quietly. Why even risk it if you know their habits? Just go! And when they come looking for you, they'll start to be like ohh damn, look at that, its already past 4...Basically EVERYONE is gone that I need or want to speak with. MAYBE, just MAYBE I should start getting my ass in here before 330pm or else i shouldn't even come in at all....Because its pointless!
[email protected]
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952
11/16/21 at 8:22PM UTC
Because i have placed many high level Executive Assistants, I agree that most understand that it is not an 8-5 job and for many at that high level 24/7 keeping an eye on that email and phone. The hourlys are a different story. Most want to adhere to their hours. Hopefully they arrive on time and want to leave on time. I say just say goodbye with purse on shoulder and walk by but problem is now the pattern has been established so she will have to address it.
Danielle
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11/15/21 at 4:46PM UTC
In your defense, you are off the clock just like they are! Respect is 100% universal. Just as you stated, he could call, email, or get with you prior to your end time. It's disrespectful to "insist," and he is insisting, that you stay after normal work hours. My fear is that he will continue to overstep the boundaries after you have the baby and you will feel even more singled out and annoyed. Have a conversation with your boss as soon as possible. Explain that you are happy to discuss your projects or answer any questions he may have but by day's end, you are mentally fatigued. It's important to you to be attuned and mentally focused on your conversation as not to miss important facts and suggestions. He should be compassionate and care enough to make sure you are mentally and physically in the best space. Work/Life balance is critical as is respect! I will keep you and your boss in my prayers. Please keep us posted. Best!

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