Letting 1 Perceived Failure Determine Your Destiny
I went through a professional suicide a little over a year ago. I had accepted a position out of state, 6 figures, but more importantly I had a passion to do it so I was emotionally already invested in it. Within 3 months, I knew it was a horrible mistake and my manager felt so as well. It was a mutual decision to leave the company but it tanked my confidence and I was left emotionally shattered about my career. Talk about a nose dive - then the worst happened and COVID came and further cemented my own feeling of inadequacy. I couldn't find a job anywhere. For the first time in my career - NOBODY WANTED ME. Fast forward 1 year. I now have a job that I really enjoy however it has taken months to move past the negative and overwhelming fear of failure. So I became someone so focused on pleasing and making everything right that I lost myself, again undermining my confidence and worst of all, I became someone I'm not. I looked at my resume and said to myself "where are you? your resume is impressive, but you're a disaster" ( quote from my husband - said with love)
I wish I could say it was a light bulb moment, it wasn't. It was, and still is, a gradual and determined process to not let others determine my success, and for me to take it one day at a time. With that 1 position, in an otherwise stellar career path, it took a long time to see it for what it was, a reality check. Life is hard, a job is hard but don't make one the overarching guideline for you life - work is work - leave it there. It's taken a really really long time to gain that one shred of confidence to move toward the person I was and to also become an improved version of myself related to my job and including my life!
Don't let 1 "failure" become so overwhelming and all consuming both emotionally and psychologically, that you become paralyzed in your growth (personal and professional). I am still "recovering" from that position and definitely have my bad days but they are becoming less frequent than before and I'm gaining more confidence each day.
When a reporter asked, "How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?" Edison replied, "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps." "Great success is built on failure, frustration, even catastrophy."
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