Frustrated, Abused and Uncertain
I’ve been at my current job for 8+ years and am one of the top 5 sales reps. I generally like what I do, I’m very good at my job and my customers love me. My problem is with my boss. He’s what I would call “explosive”. He manages me, and everyone else, by fear and intimidation and often screams and yells during discussions. I asked to meet with him recently because there has been a severe shift in the attitudes of the customer service team, and these (negative/unhelpful) attitudes are affecting his customers. During our meeting, I started to show him a file I created that included 20+ emails from several different customers, and as I was explaining the context of each situation, he started screaming and yelling at me and said “the people in the office think you are “privileged”, “condescending” and think you have an attitude of “entitlement.” But he did not provide any context around these statements or provide any voicemails I had left, emails I had sent, etc. And no one at the office has ever approached me or asked to speak to me about my behaviour towards them. Personally I think that’s what he feels about me, not them. He went on to say, “there are things that you are good at, but there are lots of things that you’re absolutely terrible at,” but he did not explain what those terrible things were. He then said “I’ve always tried to help you” (which he did as he gave me a lot of accounts and helped me with my personal financial investments), “ but you don’t want to listen to what I’m telling you”. From my standpoint, I don’t see how helping me with accounts and investments gives him the right to scream and yell. I see these actions as verbal abuse and assault. I’m a top producer and deserve to be treated with respect and appreciation. This was also not the first time he exploded on me. There have been several other incidents, one of which he told me to go look for another job after I proved to him another rep got paid for my sale and lied about it. Screaming, yelling, and manipulating are his management styles. Ive now reached my abuse limit and feel my only choice is to look for another job, or hope I get a package. I’d like to be able to talk it out with him, but highly doubt he’ll be receptive to any input I have. What are your thoughts? What do you suggest?
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Need some answers
I don't know what I am doing in my life right now. I have never been confused.
Let's start with my professional life. I have wanted to quit for so long, but there has been no job offer. Struggling every day.
Personally, I am in a relationship and we wanted to get married, but the guy's parents are not ready because I am 2 years older and different caste. They are just like I am not matching their criteria. Now, he is ready to leave his parents and marry me, but how do I convince my father to get us married? He is a heart patient, and I can never leave my family. My parents have done a lot for me, and I can't go against them. I can be a rebel and not marry anyone, but is it sensible to ask your father to get you married to the guy whose parents are not ready to even meet me?
So tired of everything now.
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