My husband's daughter keeps hitting him up for money...

Question

to pay her rent, to pay for food, to pay for car repairs. She and her husband (a real loser) both work minimum wage jobs and they have a young child. But this is a repeat pattern and I am concerned if he keeps giving in, she will NEVER take care of herself. Am I crazy?

Tamara R. · Answer

Wow! It sounds like no one here has had to deal with the difficult family dynamics and financial implications of a blended family. My husband would do anything for his daughter and 1 year that caused US to take on debt. Not only did I put my foot down, but I held resentment toward her for awhile, which was probably not ideal. I suggest you think about how you want to approach it and discuss it when you are calm. What are your joint financial responsibilities and goals? What are you jeopardizing - needed repairs to a house or car, dream vacation, retirement plans, etc.? Is he enabling them to be irresponsible or are they doing their best and still struggling? Do they need help with budgeting? There are no easy answers and I wish you luck in finding a solution that everyone can feel good about.

Anonymous · Answer

Let him give her the money. It's his money, not yours, and his daugher, not yours.

Anonymous · Answer

WOW, it sounds like you are heartless to me. If your husband can help his hard working daughter and husband support their child then he should! If you had a child of your own, maybe you would know what that feels like!

Tamara R. · Answer

Need to add - conflict over how much support to give an adult child is not limited to blended families. I know parents who have faced similar issues and were not in agreement.

Anonymous · Answer

What makes you think they're not? What do you do for a living?

Any couple that is working a minimum wage job to support their family is working hard.

My husband's daughter keeps hitting him up for money...

You're invited.

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