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Anonymous
06/27/19 at 9:09PM UTC
in
Money

Has anyone ever volunteered their salary information to you? How do you deal?

On occasion, when I've asked someone what they do for a living or a job description, I've been met with numbers--even details about their expected bonuses and raises. I'm always stunned and unsure how to respond. I have no desire to share my paycheck with the world, unless asked to do so for a reason. Am I just too uptight or is offering money info before a job title a usual response?

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Ruzana Glaeser
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950
Co-founder of brightmeetsbrave.com
07/05/19 at 4:23PM UTC
I think sharing what you make (in ranges, not precise numbers) is a good practice, but ONLY when asked and in certain settings (probably not at a social BBQ gathering). If somebody is trying to figure out if they are being paid fairly, why not help them out and say that for somebody in my position an expected salary range should be between $x-$x with a potential bonus between y%-y% But if somebody volunteers info about their salary range without being prompted, I normally just smile and say 'Good for you!' or 'Nice!' and switch it towards questions of "Do you enjoy what you do?" I also think job titles are irrelevant, it's all in roles and responsibilities, you can be a VP of something and have no direct reports or any real authority. Or you can be a supervisor with responsibilities of managing a decent size P&L and have 30 indirect reports.
Kimberly Mohr
star-svg
392
06/28/19 at 10:09PM UTC
I like Alison’s response. Mine is similar. I would interrupt at the first sign of numbers being shared and say “Oh I mean your responsibilities and duties - I don’t care to hear the gritty details. If they continue, do not volunteer your salary information - - simply say “Good for you”. Then change the subject. What you earn is nobody’s business. People often share to get you to reciprocate.
Alison
star-svg
684
Dismantling the patriarchy - one bro at a time
06/28/19 at 12:36AM UTC
It really depends with how that person grew up socializing and talking about money and also what they do for a living, and if their profession or social circle is one that discusses money very openly. It also depends on the dynamic; this person may be trying to impress you or connect with you and thinks that money is the way to do that, or they just may be an open book where when you ask a question, you get all of the answers. I recently asked someone at a BBQ if she was enjoying the afternoon and she gave me a long story about everything wrong happening in her life, so you just never know. I think ultimately you don't have to share any information you don't feel comfortable sharing. You can respond with something generic, like, "That's great" or "It sounds like this has been a good career move for you" or "That sounds like a lucrative project for you" and just leave it at that, and if you want to, excuse yourself from the conversation.

You're invited.

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