moving in with a partner too quickly

Question

a good friend of mine just started dating someone and is planning to move in with him next month (they've been seeing each other for a bit less than two months). I don't think this is a great idea, but is it my place to say something? I can't decide.

Courtney Klein · Answer

You can say something, but do it compassionately. When you speak to her, let her know that you feel it's a poor decision and you feel that it may end poorly. Frame everything based on your feelings and not her decision. Make it clear that you are expressing your concerns for her and don't make it about her actions. Use 'I' statements rather than 'you' statements. And be prepared for her to be upset. Ultimately, the decision to address it with her is up to you, but understand that her decision to do so (and to be hurt if you don't support her) is also fair. Try to remind her that you'll still support her and be her friend, but that you don't want to see her get hurt.

Katie Malone · Answer

I moved in with my husband (bf at the time) after 6 months of long distance dating. I moved to an entirely new city & State & 11 years later we are married with two kids. So it can work. 
Unless you see red flags in her boyfriend, I would recommend staying quiet & letting her make the decision. 
But I do agree with C.Kein... if you say anything frame it compassionately.

Anonymous · Answer

Anytime is too soon.

Anonymous · Answer

So I think this depends on a few things like how old they are... If they're 18 and jumping into something... that's probably a red flag.

Although, I moved in with my boyfriend after 6 months and we decided to live with each other after 3 months. That probably sounds crazy and not something I'd necessarily think that I'd ever do but I think sometimes when you know you know.

moving in with a partner too quickly

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