When you disapprove of a loved one's actions, how do you show it without coming across as judge-y or unsupportive?

Question

Imagine your partner, sibling, best friend, or someone else close to you getting involved in something you think unwise, unsafe, or just not a good idea. How do you get through to them without coming across like a parent? Alternatively, how do you know you should bring something up as opposed to letting it fly?

Trinity · Answer

I would hear them out and try to show them you're coming from a place of love and understanding. Once that foundation has been set, they might be more likely to hear what you're saying and take it to heart. At the same time, part of our relationship with loved ones is continuing to love and support them as they work through making bad decisions and learning from them. If you feel like the conversation will be too difficult, remember back to a time when you made a decision you regret -- how could a family member or friend have supported you best? How can that translate to now?

Anonymous · Answer

This is really hard. I had a partner who started eating super unhealthily and became what seemed to me, addicted to video games. I tried all the nice, soft ways to bring it up but in the end he took it as nagging and shut down. It's super hard to have these conversations. Approach with love and understanding but also realize many times people KNOW they're doing something not great, and you pointing it out just pokes into an insecurity.

When you disapprove of a loved one's actions, how do you show it without coming across as judge-y or unsupportive?

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