Ghosting?

Question

I'm new the the term 'ghosting' and I am wondering - is it possible for employees to be 'ghosted'?  Our male supervisor rarely if ever talks to two of our female staff - he talks to the men plenty, but rarely even says boo to the two females out of 60 males.  Thoughts from you - ghosting?  What can we do to improve this atmosphere - we truly have no idea why he is choosing not to talk to the female staff.  Is it sexism, is it 'normal' and I shouldn't be worried, is it 'ghosting' - truly no idea why.   We e-mail him (due to schedule he works) for a project we want to meet and discuss and get handled and he always replies - I will talk to you on my next shift.  Okay - great.  The next shift comes, nothing, the next shift comes, nothing, the next shift comes and we ask verbally when we can meet - 'this afternoon' and this afternoon never happens.  Is that 'normal' in today's work environment?  Seems to be it is creating an unfavorable work situation.  I spoke to another male supervisor about the concern and he clearly said to me 'you are just setting the bar too high' 'you shouldn't expect so much'.  Wow - is that the work world we are getting to?  Just searching for positive things I/we can do to improve this very uncomfortable situation with this supervisor.  Being ignored on a daily basis and given no direction is draining.

Aspasia Kalapothakos · Answer

Ghosting in the Recruiting world has become more and more prevalent.  It typically means a candidate accepted an offer, and then didn't show up on day one.  The issue that you seem to be facing is more of a culture or comfort issue with your leader.  I think step one would be to directly confront the issue if you feel comfortable doing so, and if not then bring it up to HR to help step in and support.  Sad that we face these issues, but they are real.

Rose Holland · Answer

Have you approached him? He may not be aware that he is doing so. Be direct.

Erika Parker Price · Answer

Ghosting is more along the lines of disappearing entirely from someone's life, which isn't possible if you're still seeing each other day in and day out. This sounds more like ignoring or avoiding. I have two thoughts... 1) 60 people is a lot for one person to supervise. Do others (specifically men) feel that way as well? 2) I do know that many males are scared and intimidated in this new #metoo era and feel they no longer no how to act appropriately around women. This sounds like an excellent time to ask HR to step in - to provide guidance and to better the overall work environment. But, in answer to one of your questions. Is this normal? I don't think so. It's definitely not helpful or productive.

Anonymous · Answer

I wouldn't consider it ghosting but it's definitely not normal or a good leadership tactic. Try setting up meetings on his calendar to review the project instead of emails. If he doesn't respond, declines, accepts and then no-shows or cancels last minute, sounds like it's time to talk to his boss or HR. Especially if it's a routine issue and preventing you from getting your work done.

Ghosting?

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