THE BIG DECISION

Question

Okay ladies, so I am 17 years of age and I really want to be able to move out of my parents home as soon as i'm 18.  I have asked my friends and family on advice or how I could possibly start preparing now. The majority of feedback has been 'it's not as easy as you think, don't do it.' But I am not asking for their opinions, I am simply asking for advice. Ladies please help me out! I simply do not know where to start. I do plan on going to college, and I do plan on maintaining up to 2 jobs at least. I just really need advice, I have no idea where to start. I really want to begin working towards this goal of mines now. I do not turn 18 until next March. Help?!

TNBrown · Answer

Hi-This is a big first step and I commend you for wanting to embark on it. I understand your frustration with some of the advice from you friends and family. They mean well, though it may not be encouraging. Are you currently working? Do you have money saved? Have you started looking for apartments? Do you want to live alone or with a roommate or two? I would suggest maybe renting a room somewhere until you start college. This way you won't be locked into a year's least if you're going to be starting college soon. Many apartment complexes will offer short term leases, but they're more expensive and those costs can add up fast. Also, if you don't have a lot of credit or credit established, you may have to put down more than 3 mos. rent as a security deposit and you may need a co-signer/guarantor. That's something to consider. Also try to find a place where utilities are included with the rent and aren't an additional cost. That'll cut costs, but sometimes apartment complexes regulate utilities if they cover the cost which means water temp and pressure may be slightly off or you may not be able to heat or cool your apartment to the desired temp. you want. Ask them if they regulate the utilities if they're going  to cover any of them.  But that's not to say that this isn't doable, because it is. I admire your ambition. Working 2 jobs will be helpful, but could quickly burn you out. I would suggest that maybe you work a full-time job at one place and then the 2nd job be only part-time and something that isn't too stressful. Do you have an idea on how much money you'd like to spend on rent? Rent will be your largest bill and will probably be half of your monthly income. There's no sense in moving out if you can't enjoy the freedom of being on your own and the 2 jobs leave you exhausted and burned out before you even get started as an adult.  Maybe look for a 2nd job as a receptionist, leasing consultant at an apartment complex (which could get you a discount on your rent), office cleaner, hotel events/conference specialist...something that pays well and is practical, but not overly stressful. I would also suggest you write up a budget for yourself for things like utilities, rent, renter's insurance, groceries, entertainment-cable, internet, etc., and miscellaneous items. Calculate these things monthly and then look at overall cost for the year. I'd then call those places to get an idea of the monthly cost, any set up fees, taxes, promos and specials they're running ,etc. You want to cover every base and take advantage of discounts while also making sure that you can really afford it or do without somethings like cable. This is definitely doable, but really think it through and make sure you ask questions and cover all of your bases. It's never dumb to ask questions even if you feel like the question is silly or small...it's better to know up front then to assume and find out something different later. Best of luck!

Balanced357247 · Answer

I moved out before I turned 18, actually.   Providentially, I became acquainted with a girl who said she and her roommates were looking for a 5th roommate.  Eyes closed, I just leapt.  The tiny apartment was in a good neighborhood where I felt safe getting in and out of my car.  I was one of three girls cramped into one bedroom, but they gave me a small slice of closet space and a dresser.  The rent & utility bills were split 5 ways, the only way I could have afforded 'being on my own.'  The advice you got is spot on.  It wasn't easy - - - dogging volatile personalities, unfairly splitting payment for things like cable TV (that I didn't use or want), mysterious people eating my food from the fridge & pantry, random strange men sleeping on the couch, people going through my things and stealing my stuff/money.   I learned a ton of life skills.  Learned when/how to keep my big mouth shut.  Knowing a particular living situation is temporary would help  me to cope.  But I stuck it out because it was moving me toward a new direction.

Anonymous · Answer

Invest in great roommates! Being able to split living expenses with 1 or more roommates will help you cut costs and is a great way to save on things like groceries and internet services that can get pretty pricey for just 1 person. You should also make sure you're saving as much as possible right now so that you have a safety net when you're on your own. Good luck!

Lady Pele · Answer

There is some good advice above.

My primary advice is to create a realistic budget.  There are plenty of free tools on-line to help with that.  How much are you willing to sacrifice to live independently?  Will you walk, bike or take a bus versus owning a car?  Are you willing to give up internet and cable TV?  Are you willing to shop at thrift stores and buy generic brands at the grocery store?  Do you have health insurance in case of accident, illness or to help pay for prescriptions?

Check out these sites for additional help:

https://www.getbellhops.com/blog/move-out-parents-house/

https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/moving-out-of-home-tips-for-young-people

https://static1.squarespace.com/static/55592d95e4b02d567e73e236/t/555f5e39e4b08ef1ebb8d5d5/1432313401323/Moving-Out-A-Complete-Guide-and-Checklist.pdf

Crystal Rhineberger · Answer

Also define why to yourself (not other people) as to why you are striking out!
Its a great choice, now do you have a support system or are you in a sense pioneering?
Hows your image workwise? Are you clean cut or more bohemian artsy tattoo type?
Neither is bad but do prepare for some oddball judgements for both types!
Im a very conservative artist but I’m still queen of the weird for example because I’m different.
Is your crowd you run w out on their own or about to be?
If yes you and your crowd will bond 
If no you may lose a friend or two until they grow up.
I have several friends we have split and met back up later on w newly opened eyes
How is your savings account? Are you prepared for the metaphorical rainy day!
And above all never underestimate thrift stores and slowly building your household needs!

Amy Wasserman · Answer

If you're planning to work multiple jobs while in school, I would recommend attending part-time. Taking on more than 2 classes plus jobs at the same time is likely to burn you out. You'll be better off getting strong grades early on, and giving yourself time to figure out what subjects you really want to study. You may want to consider taking core classes at a community college where they will cost less, and then transferring to a 4-year college after a couple of years.

Be very thoughtful about how much student debt you might incur, and ask for assistance with setting up your finances from someone you trust (including this group.)

If you don't have one, get a credit card to begin establishing a credit profile. Use it once or twice a month for small purchases, and pay off the balance in full every month, so you can start building a strong credit score.

There are some great online financial tools you can use to establish a budget, and track your expenses. I like Mint.com. Lots of people like YNAB (You Need a Budget).

I agree with the above commenters regarding living with roommates. This can drastically cut your expenses when you're first out on your own. It is a good idea to meet with potential roommates, and discussing living styles before agreeing to anything. Make sure everyone is on the lease, and is responsible for their portion of the rent/utilities/etc.

Joining FGB is a great step in the right direction. I also recommend joining the Ladies Get Paid Slack to begin networking. Look for your local city channel within the group to connect with other women who may be able to give you advice, and assist you in your journey.

If you are currently working, start saving as much as you can now. The bigger your nest egg, the easier the transition will be.

The simple fact that you are reaching out for advice now means you are on the right track. Trust yourself, continue to be thoughtful, and you'll do great! Best of luck!

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