This is embarrassing, but...

Question

I need some support. I've been consulting since I graduated in May and I've been on a lot of remote projects. Traveling 4-5 days a week basically means I haven't had any time to make friends in my 'home base' town (thats way far away from the cities most of my friends are living in) or really even explore my hometown, and I spend my weekends really lonely and holed up at home. I love what I do and I love my company and the cool opportunities I have, but I have no idea how to make my home feel like home when I'm not living there. Do any consultants or former consultants have advice or just some encouragement?

Anonymous · Answer

I can totally relate! I had a similar issue when I was traveling for work a ton a few years ago and living in a new city.  The only way I really made friends was an introduction from a friend who had another friend who moved to the same city, and that sprang into a larger group of friends (who understood when I had to cancel last minute for travel plans!). Using the network you currently have can go a long way in meeting new people, even if they don't live in the same city.

Lady Pele · Answer

One of my mantras is that you can find anything on Google (or the search engine of your choice).

Search for 'Making friends in a new city' and you'll find dozens of suggestions.  My best advice is to look for interest groups, whether it's exercising, cooking, gardening, faith-based, or whatever piques your interest.   It can be hard to put yourself out there, but the rewards are worth it.

Focused326093 · Answer

I don’t know what happened to my previous post... grr.

Ok. So hosting a “soup Sunday” is a great way to meet people in a more connected way.

Making the invitation casual allows the freedom and flexibility for people to invite others. You make soup ( super inexpensive) and other people bring potluck.

Smaller towns and communities will understand this kind of introduction.

Pretty soon, the doors will be open to anyone, and people will feel free to come.

I know people who have been doing this once a month for over 20 years.

Anonymous · Answer

Ahh, I’ve been here. While it’s exhausting, planning time to meet/network with mutual friends is the way to get you out of that lonely feeling.

Jason · Answer

I’m a consultant who works at home and communicates virtually with clients. You might want to see if you can transition to this set up (use Zoom and Skype to communicate face to face). Its also cheaper and saves on time if you don’t have to travel as much and you can put down some roots. However, the best option is to get the most out of the people you work and consult with. Turn profession into personal and talk to them about their personal lives, see if they have time to grab a coffee or show you around town to the best bars, shops, and local spots. Your clients are people too! And they like being treated as such!

IntentionGirl205468 · Answer

You may consider joining a meetup group of your interest in order to develop some consistency of friendships even if you don't make it to each meetup.

Anonymous · Answer

Have you tried keeping your friends close in a virtual way? Or flying into cities to be with friends when you're traveling? I know that might be the last thing you want to do under the circumstances but it may help you feel less lonely.

This is embarrassing, but...

You're invited.

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