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Competing with the boss for job specific tasks
I work for a small business and was hired to support several facets of business operations, with my specific background in contract management and accounting. I was hired by the CEO to work for the CFO, who I later found out was disappointed that I was hired. He had been hoping to take over the contract management aspect of the business when the CEO retired, and made it very clear from the outset that he didn't appreciate my knowledge, and insinuated that I shouldn't have been hired at all. I've since proven myself as an asset to the company, but my direct supervisor still acts as though I'm his secretary or assistant. I've gone to the new CEO for help and although he has listened and been supportive verbally, the situation remains stagnant. With today's job climate (due to COVID), it would be tough to find another job with such a wide range of interesting and challenging tasks. I find it difficult to work with this person, even though I have to do so daily. Does anyone have any suggestions regarding how to get along with him but WITHOUT giving in to him? The only way I've found to get along is to give in, let him get what he wants, or to apologize for my knowledge. I refuse to do any of that anymore, but I need an alternate plan.
Michelle Cranston
Marketing Analytics
63
07/24/20 at 6:52AM UTC
Hi, I don't think you should be forced out of a job and a company you love. I don't know the specifics of what you have already tried. I don't know this man either, but he is a man/human and the end of the day. To survive you need to build a relationship with this person beyond the job specifics - I find football/cricket/sport helps a lot! My director will always defend my colleague because she likes her and they are similar. It might just take the tension off, if he starts to realise you as more than just your bank of knowledge because you ARE MORE than that. I always look for the gaps as well, you know the job you know what to do, so why wait to have tasks delegated to you, you are not his asssitant. Project plans are good with responsibilities assigned upfront. It will catch him out one day and he will be thankful (secretly) you were there, if you are not already friends on some level. Good luck.
Jackie GhedineCoach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
5.81k
07/22/20 at 12:34PM UTC
No matter what you do, Anonymous, his insecurities are going to beat you up at every turn. The only thing he could have hoped for is your failure so he could regain control of those responsibilities. Well, you proved him wrong over and over and over again. He isn't going to change, now what? You can bite your lip or you can just be you and stop apologizing for being good at your job and instead highlight what you've done and send reports at the end of the week to both CEO and CFO.
The only solution is for the CEO to put his money where is mouth is and change the reporting structure. Let the CFO keep his title and responsibilities but allowing you to report to the CEO.
If you're looking to leave, waiting until COVID is over may not be necessary. There are so many opportunities, especially with organizations realizing that WFH is an option, it opens up the applicant pool (and your pool as well). Just start investigating what's out there, that act alone can alleviate the stress of thinking, "I'm stuck until."
Good luck and keep being the shining star you are!
Anonymous
07/23/20 at 12:20PM UTC
Thank you Jackie. It's as if you're inside my head, thinking the exact same way I'm thinking. I just vowed to myself earlier this week that I won't apologize anymore!! People can change, but only if they want to, and the CFO clearly doesn't want to. He's extremely insecure, and his passive agressive and manipulative behavior comes from that fact. I'll polish my resume and start putting it out there. It makes me sad, because I love the work I do, and the majority of the people I work with, but this situation is making me miserable. Thanks so much for the validation!
Maggie BBusiness and Data Analysis Consultant
983
07/21/20 at 6:37PM UTC
This sounds like a toxic situation. I'd recommend keeping your resume updated and be open to going elsewhere if the opportunity presents itself - this CFO isn't going to give you the chance to grow, especially if the CEO isn't backing you up across the org.
Anonymous
07/21/20 at 8:29PM UTC (Edited)
Thanks Maggie. I agree. The CEO tries very hard to be my "cheerleader", but won't step in and assist in getting this straightened out. It's disheartening at the very least.
Kathleen BeemanEmpowering people-centric leadership.
182
07/21/20 at 4:15PM UTC
This is a hard situation since I'm assuming he is higher in the organization than you with the CFO title? Maybe it would take a very open conversation about your role and what you would like for it to be. Make it less about him and how he treats you but instead focus on the work that you would love to be doing to drive the business forward. You could also approach it as a "we" rather than an "I" conversation about things that you think you together can accomplish. That way it becomes a team view rather than you trying to take something that he loves. You could also be very clear on lines of responsibility when new tasks or projects come around. Being vocal about your understanding of the roles and expectations can help. When I've had similar situations I try to take cues from them about the way that person talks to others. Are they task focused, action focused, conversational. They have a sweet spot for communicating and getting into their inner world and you sort of have to find that and get in there...at least until you can find a way out! My old boss was very direct, she only wanted to talk about the action and deliverables and only valued when people could deliver something quick and quietly. It was very different from my style so I adjusted and it did end up working well for me.
Anonymous
07/21/20 at 4:59PM UTC
Hi Kathleen - thank you for your input. We've had many discussions about this over the last two or three years, and each time he admits that he's embarrassed that I have more knowledge than he does in one specific area, but refuses to let that go. I have adjusted, and adjusted some more, and adjusted again. I think I'm done adjusting to his whims and self-indulgence. I'm done being talked down to in meetings, and I'm done with his mansplaining - mansplaining my job to me incorrectly, I might add. He does enjoy saying "we" in front of others, and then assigning the menial tasks to me in private. I guess I've answered my own question. Just bite my lip and bow to his will until COVID is in the past, and put him in my past as well.
User deleted comment on 07/21/20 at 4:52PM UTC
DeniseContracts & Accounting Manager
348
07/21/20 at 8:24PM UTC
Oh I absolutely document our conversations these days, via email.
Kathleen BeemanEmpowering people-centric leadership.
182
07/21/20 at 4:56PM UTC
Yes! I always document the understanding and have it in a record - usually an email. That way you can use it and pull it up later if there is ever a disagreement.
Anonymous
07/21/20 at 3:15PM UTC
I have a similar situation and I find I just walk on eggshells all the time which is not helpful to you. I let the offending party take the lead whenever possible, I just tell myself it's less for me if this other person does it even if it's part of my normal role.
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