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Reducing Your Visibility At Work
“When Michelle stays quiet in meetings it’s not because she’s shy or lacks confidence. Instead, she knowingly subdues what she considers her natural tendency to vocalize her thoughts for the sake of professional advancement. As a result, she reduces her visibility to avoid being perceived as bitchy.”
Michelle and so many women share this commonality. Can you relate?!
Confident Career WomanHelping women make PowHer Moves in their career
2.46k
07/22/19 at 9:21PM UTC
I love your awareness Maggie!!❤️❤️
Maggie BBusiness and Data Analysis Consultant
983
07/17/19 at 4:24PM UTC
I'd rather be perceived as "bitchy" than passive. "Bitchy" is a shitty non-professional word. If you take it and put the right spin on it for your profession, it becomes "ASSERTIVE" which is definitely a positive for anyone else. I've also been told I'm "intimidating" which I think was actually code for "bitchy" as well but the heck with that. I get things done.
Confident Career WomanHelping women make PowHer Moves in their career
2.46k
07/17/19 at 8:44PM UTC
Biased labels inspire me to ask questions and challenge mindsets Maggie. When someone says “You’re intimidating”, I’d respond with “Tell me more.” The research as well as my observations conclude men receive favorable feedback for the same behavior women are penalized for.
Maggie BBusiness and Data Analysis Consultant
983
07/18/19 at 3:43PM UTC
Exactly. I always ask what they mean. In the right role, I love saying "let's unpack that" to my coworkers and figuring out the root of what's going on. In the right role, it shakes out that I'm doing everything right and coming up against sexist perceptions that can be ignored. In the wrong role, I'm discriminated against, and my time there is short. I'm okay with both of these things.
Carrie TopolskiEmpowering women and beyond!
2.34k
07/08/19 at 5:54PM UTC
I agree with LadyPele. Sometimes people don't think of the same thoughts or ideas as you and sometimes people do but are afraid to speak up.
Lady PeleRetired Project Manager
3.96k
07/08/19 at 3:04PM UTC
I agree with Isaviel. I don’t make an effort to speak up at every meeting (unless, of course, I called it). Sometimes, it depends on the meeting. Is it being held as a working session? To pass information along? As a status update?
Phrasing is extremely important. Rather than saying “That won’t work, X will occur”, I would say “how will we handle it if X occurs?” Or when someone offers an idea that only partially addresses a problem, I might say “I agree with Joan/John. We could also do X if Y occurs.”
Confident Career WomanHelping women make PowHer Moves in their career
2.46k
07/08/19 at 6:32PM UTC
Phrasing and positioning is critical LadyPele! Not only do we need the wisdom to know when as well as how to respond, we must respond and not react.
Carrie TopolskiEmpowering women and beyond!
2.34k
07/08/19 at 12:46PM UTC
There of course is always a time to speak up and not to speak up. However, if I didn't speak up then I would not be a part of the Women's Network Hub that I help lead today.
I think it's important to give your feedback and get noticed. If you don't then you're just allowing the same things to continue the way they always have been. Speaking up can help alter the same old same old and give new life and advancement for yourself and others.
Speaking up does not mean you're a bitch. It could come off that way but you have to think about how you're going to speak up. Don't speak up if you're just going to complain about something. Speak up if you are going to complain but have a suggested resolution.
Confident Career WomanHelping women make PowHer Moves in their career
2.46k
07/08/19 at 6:30PM UTC
Bring solutions not problems is something I lived by when I was in leadership Isaviel. Great points and I appreciate you chiming in!
Anonymous
07/07/19 at 5:32PM UTC
This is interesting I’ve done this so many times (sitting in the back watching) not really present. Why? sometimes we feel our feed back won’t matter. Secondly, yes I’ve been on both sides not saying anything staying at a company for 4 years keeping quite and then on the other side as to recently speaking up more about the elephant in the room and been fired the same day lmao! I believe some companies want to have these meeting but never address the elephant in the room and they rather it that way. If you can’t address something or speak up I’ve learned that’s not the job you want to give your all too ❤️
Confident Career WomanHelping women make PowHer Moves in their career
2.46k
07/07/19 at 7:12PM UTC
Great points Dorii! It’s wise to pick your battles, however silence can backfire when it comes to career advancement just as speaking up can. We as women have to move with strategy and less emotion. The move could be to use our voice, the move could be to remain silent as we observe the best approach prior to taking action or the move could mean exercising the option to work for a different employer.
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