Tough day - when to apologize for not being the best mom?

Question

I had one of those days where I snapped at my kids, had very little patience and just generally was not the best mom. I felt like apologizing to them but then thought it might make things worse because they may be too young to understand. When do you think children are old enough to understand that sometimes the way that their parents behave has nothing to do with them and everything to do with what else is going on (e.g. stressful day at work, argument with husband, etc etc)?

Rose Holland · Answer

Children are never too young to learn it is OK to make mistakes and that you need to apologize when you do.

Mary Ann Ganit · Answer

Hi Momof4, i also experienced that especially when I'm working before, I'm so tired and I got easily angry with them. If you think their wrong make them realize their wrong and then give them sometime to make them realize it and then afterwards if you think your attitude towards them is wrong you have to talk to them and tell them sorry if you had acted wrongly and explain to them that you love them. We love our children and we want the best of them but we are not perfect so don't bit yourself on that. Give time to your kids, play with them.  God bless you and your family!

SophieG · Answer

Apologise. You set a wonderful dynamic of acknowledging fault, apologising, seeking forgiveness. They are never too young, and they are surprisingly good at learning even quite complex emotional elements at a young age

Melissa Nicholson · Answer

I took a parenting course called Empathy Parenting and learned that no matter the age toddler to teen, how we react is everything and nearly all our reactions have more to do with our mental state than their melt down. But it's hard! I always own up, apologize, and make sure they know I love them.

Gillianne Hetrick · Answer

I agree with all the advice, apologize.  Explain that mom can have a hard day.  Explain that it is not the child's job to take the burden of mom's bad day, and that it's not their job to fix it.

It's okay for everyone to be human, it's not okay to pretend you are not.  Your children will be better friends, better co-workers, better people for you being real with them and explaining with love how everyone has a breaking point and it isn't the last straw that caused the snap but all the ones piled on before.

My daughter and I discuss emotions every time she has a tough day and when I have tough days.  We also discuss the emotions on awesome days :)

Tough day - when to apologize for not being the best mom?

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