Unprofessional and borderline abusive manager (actually asking for my sister)
February 7,2019 at 3:06PM UTC
So, here's the deal - my little sister recently graduated college and has dreams of working in HR. Her current position is offering her a step in that direction and, overall, it seems like she enjoys the work. However, yesterday she asked me how often I have to be "rude" at work, and specifically said "not stern and not setting boundaries, but straight up rude." Naturally, I asked for her to explain further, and the long and short of it is that her manager is just an awful person and my sister's boyfriend as well as some of her friends are saying she's "too soft," and that's why her manager is being so mean.
Now, when I saw "awful," I mean that this woman called another one of her employees a "pu**y a** b***h" when he disagreed with her. The other day when my sister came back in from moving her car, her manager whispered to some other employees "shh, she's back," the clear implication being that they were talking about her. In adequate horror, I still advised my sister to continue to be herself - she's a sweet girl who does a very good job of professionally defending herself and setting up reasonable boundaries. She can say "no," and can also take criticism very well. I pointed out that when she interviews for new jobs (as she's already started looking) they may call this place for reference, and she doesn't want to be known as "that" girl.
I also recommended that she go to her boss' supervisor or HR. But here's the kicker: Her boss IS HR, and her supervisor is the president of the company. Understandably, my sister is nervous to go to the president and when HR is being like that, where else do you go? The company is too small to have some kind of hotline, so she has very limited options.
My question is this, FGBers - does anyone else have this kind of experience and/or what options does my sister have? I've never experienced something this wildly inappropriate, and I've suffered my share of nonsense. I'd like to give her more options to consider, but have no idea what else to recommend. Any ideas from the community?
TL;DR - my sister's boss is unprofessional, awful, and nearly abusive and my sister doesn't know what to do. Said boss is HR, so sister has limited options. Any ideas?
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