Our business relies on satisfying our clients. But lately I feel it has been taken too far with regards to how I am being treated.
I am on a team with one other person - a man (this is important as I will detail later). The director of IT is in charge of this client.
We have a particularly aggressive and combative contact with this client. He has been rude in all the meetings. In one meeting in particular, though, he made it clear that he preferred to speak to my co-worker instead of me. My coworker and I met with the director and my co-worker (not me) even brought up that this client didn't like working with women and would not listen to me even though my co-worker and I were saying the same things.
I was asked by the director to speak to the client only through my male co-worker. I know the director was thinking of keeping the client and not putting me in the firing line. He wasn't meaning to be sexist but boy was he!
It doesn't end there. The client has been scheduling meetings with only my male co-worker. I asked to be included in the meetings and my director asked me if I wanted to be there "just so [I] could feel included." Then he asked me to "think strategically." I was beyond angry.
I'm tired of making excuses for my director's bad choice of words. Whether he means well or not he isn't backing me up. And my co-worker is a people pleaser and won't ask the client to include be because he doesn't want to upset him.
I went to HR and told them all this and they said that I might want to start having "outside conversations." Edit: To be clear - she was asking me to find another job.
I feel rejected. I was a great employee and tried to do what they asked but I don't think I am off base here. If the director wants to be in his position he needs to be more aware of marginalized communities and not treat us like second-class citizens. Am I thinking about this in the wrong way?
Browse recent posts
Changing careers is really hard the older you get.
I work for the federal government and lately I have had a strong desire to change my job series. But I am at a level in the GS series, where it is difficult to switch, and I cannot afford to take a pay cut to learn a new role. If I don't make a change in the next 3 to five years, I may as well just retire in place. Networking is even harder when you move up the ladder in the GS series, everyone is on guard. I have been thinking of taking a lateral position at a different agency so that maybe I can meet a new group of people. As I write this, a lateral move sounds like a great idea. Just wondering if someone else has experienced this funk and how they got out of it. Thanks in advance for sharing.
0 Likes • 0 Comments
Networking is hard and overrated
So many talk about networking as this silver bullet that if you do it, you are going to find this wonderful hidden job. Well, I found out that this is really not the case. When you are looking for a job, you really should be doing everything- network, but also look for job postings, utilize recruiters as well. When you really need that job, people you know don't immediately rush to help you unless you are very lucky and they know of a position that fits your skills perfectly. At least this was my experience so far, I really did not find a good job networking.
3 Likes • 4 Comments
Hi, so a year ago my role was restructured out of the executive team and I took another lower role in the organization.
I could of taken redundancy but I stayed. A year on I am so bored, the work is not challenging and I am missing so much working at an exec level. I do ask myself if it is ego but I don't think it is, I love being stretched and love learning and making a difference. My motivation has left me and I have made the decision to emigrate next April. I need to stay for the money till them but I want my mojo back for work. I am not the type of person that can clip the ticket. It is affecting my health as well.
0 Likes • 1 Comment
I’m not sure I’m going to make it
I started a position at a state government agency in February. I honestly knew when I took it that it was a mistake, but I was living on savings and needed to stop the bleeding. At the end of March, a colleague brought up a federal grant that she wanted me to apply for. She is at another agency and she and I are supposed to be working on a program together but she has done next to nothing, other than come up with ideas for me to implement.
I went to my manager immediately and put the grant on her radar. She initially said no, because the program I inherited already has a fiscal year aggressive timeline. She told me to email the Director about it and I did.
The Director gets sick a lot. I didn’t get a response and sent a follow up email a week later when she was back in office. Neither one of them made a definite decision at the time. They wanted to wait until another discussion among other people at the agency took place.
Finally, after I asked for a decision, my manager told me to schedule a go/no go meeting with the director who finally decided that she wanted ‘us’ (really me) to write it. By this time a month of time had been lost.
Mind you, I don’t have grant writing experience. I was only here 2.5 months before this was put on me. I haven’t been afforded grant writing training, and this wasn’t mentioned in the job description or interview. After them wasting away the month, I’ve had to make up the time working nights and weekends. I got partnered with a person on our team who flat out said he didn’t want to do it. He feels there is another person on the team that this grant should’ve gone to.
The reason I took a government job is because my mental health is poor. On paper, I’m overqualified. I’ve been in therapy and getting help for months and I thought that I could handle a 9-5 and focus on my health. Unfortunately exact opposite is happening and my mental and physical health are getting worse. To top it off, I’ve had to put my program on hold for a grant that has nothing to do with it. My manager is trying to force this grant to tie into my program but it just doesn’t. And I’m done working late nights and weekends on this. I worked Memorial Day and she acts like it’s no big deal. Worked until 3am last night and emailed her and our admin so that someone else is aware of the after hours I’m putting in and not getting compensation for.
I’m trying to give myself three months of job searching but I’m hanging on a thread.
I want to quit everyday. I went to see the ADA coordinator today and asked her about the procedure for reasonable accommodation because I need an additional telework day. She seemed visibly uncomfortable. It also happens that she was the one who reached out to me about this job. We’re meeting tomorrow and I don’t plan on telling her all the details, but I’m really unhappy here. I’m just trying to use my frustration as fuel to really look for a job that’s a good fit.
I’d like to ask you all what you would do in this position? The job market is volatile and it’s stressful going through this process yet again.
Thanks for reading this.
0 Likes • 2 Comments
Hello everyone, just want to say I appreciate this platform and all stories I hear that make me feel not alone in all the scary, beautiful, frustrating and fulfilling parts of work.
I do have a question though about job offers. Whats the longest you have had to wait to hear back from a job offer? I am currently in a 2 month stand still with two companies and they from time to time keep calling to ask follow up questions. I just don't understand why. I just want to know if its a lost cause or have people finally got offered jobs they've waited months for. Thank yall!
0 Likes • 6 Comments
I was reading a job description in an email and this was part of the job description:
Job Title: Enterprise Architect
Looking only 10 - 15 years client is not accepting 20+ years of experience candidates
* Minimum of 10+ years of professional technology/ w. concentration in data
* Superior knowledge with the ability to manage and coordinate enterprise information use, corporate data access design, metadata management and distributed/replicated data approach to ensure consistency, timeliness, data lineage, data quality, and availability of master data throughout the enterprise
* Ability to define Data Strategy, Data Governance process; Prior experience in defining Data Strategy is a plus
* Hands-on experience with one or more business intelligence tools or comparable programming and data experience is a plus
"Client is not accepting 20+ years of experience candidates" - Is this considered Age Discrimination?
Share your insight
Join an authentic community that helps women support each other at work. Share your professional experience or ask for advice — you can even post anonymously.