I’ve negotiated several times and it still feels scary and like I don’t know what I’m doing! On average, they usually come up by about $5,000. In some cases I have negotiated for non-salary things that will get me closer to my salary needs, such as an employee review with a salary reevaluation within six months of hire. The review option worked well because it gave me a chance to demonstrate my value first hand and prove to them that I was worth more (and I did end up getting a raise after that six-month evaluation). I usually just try to be honest and genuine in trying to meet a mutually agreeable goal. I know my number before they ever make an offer. Once they contact me with their first offer, if it’s acceptable I don’t need to negotiate. Negotiation is only when it truly won’t meet the amount I need to support my family. If the offer is not enough, I start by letting them know I’m grateful for the offer and I’m excited about the position, I just need to think about it. I don’t negotiate right away when emotions are high. I spend the night to think and discuss. I may revisit my budget to see if there’s any way it can work. I might do a pros and cons list to see if other non-financial benefits make this salary worth it. When I talk to them again, I reiterate that I’m interested in the position, and then I tell them what I need. If I need them to come up a bit, I tell them I need the salary closer to xyz number. If I need them to match my previous salary, I tell them that. They might ask a few questions trying to find out if there is anything else that will make me not want a higher salary, but I have already considered those things usually because I took a night to evaluate. I just tell them genuinely that in order to meet my financial obligations I just really need the salary to (one of the two above). I try not to say it like “I need you to” necessarily, so it isn’t a me vs. them. They’ll usually then need some time to see what they can do. Then I just wait!