I live in the US and am pregnant with my second.

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Anonymous

02/20/21 at 1:40PM UTC

I live in the US and am pregnant with my second.

I am planning on telling my boss next week (20 weeks into preg). He was my boss when I told him about first pregnancy two years ago. He says I’m his first direct report that he’s gone through this process with. Any tips on how to best do this?

7 Comments

Taylor Adams

T & D Manager, EQ Fanatic and Wellness Advocate

02/20/21 at 2:13PM UTC

Congratulations on your pregnancy! Do you work for a company that offers FMLA to their employees? Usually dependent on size (50 or more employees). If yes, your HR personnel should be able to manage your news. If not, I’d sit down with your boss and let him know you have exciting news. You mentioned he was your boss previously, was the conversation received negatively last time? I hope not. In my opinion, pregnancy conversations should be normal and received well, but I realize that’s not always the case. If you’ve been through this process before at the same company, the good thing is that they’ve done it before so they should be able to do it again!

Dawn S. Cross

826

Goals should scare a little & excite a lot

02/20/21 at 2:53PM UTC

Congratulations! Assuming all is going smoothly, make a plan before talking to your boss. Lay out how long you will be out, what will need to be done, suggestions on people who will be able to step in temporarily and how you will train them. Make sure to know your rights (tuck them in your pocket for later reference if needed). Set a meeting with your manager and once done be professional and follow up with an email documenting what you talked about. Since you are his first direct report, I’m sure he will appreciate the thoughtfulness that has gone into this to make sure your position is covered while you are out. Congrats again!

Anonymous

02/20/21 at 2:53PM UTC

Yes- it’s a large publicly traded company and im lucky to have good fmla benefits. I won’t comment on first conversation... overall it was ok....

User edited comment on 02/20/21 at 2:54PM UTC

Anonymous

02/20/21 at 7:27PM UTC

Congratulations! Since you work for a large company, maybe reach out through HR or the leadership development teams and see what information and training is offered to supervisors about how to handle FMLA conversations. If you know what training and language was offered to your supervisor, it may help you frame your own conversation style. When you do have the conversation remember- you do not have to assume an apologetic tone over this! Having a child is wonderful, and you are legally protected and empowered to have them, regardless of whatever opinions your boss has about the workplace. Lead with a tone of excitement and opportunity, and don't let anyone make you feel like you've done something wrong.

DeborahORell

101

We're a women’s rights in the workplace law firm

02/24/21 at 1:29PM UTC

Congratulations. Set the intention at the beginning that all is well. You are excited to be having a baby and that you love your job. As the saying goes hope for the best. Your personal energy can make a difference in how you come across. Professionally, even when you work for the most family friendly employer, protect yourself. Anytime after the first trimester is recommended. Assure your boss you love your job and give a timetable to show you've thought about this. Then send a follow up email. You want to document when you notified your employer of your pregnancy. If things were to go south, proof of this notification could be important. Wishing you all the best.

Anonymous

02/24/21 at 1:34PM UTC

Thank you so much. I’m still a bit scarred from some things that were said the first time around- I’m sure not intentionally- but hoping things go well this time.

Anonymous

02/28/21 at 6:42PM UTC

Update: it went well. Smoothly. I prepared a little flow for my notification and it helped a lot. Kept it to the facts (I’d like to share some personal news, I’m pregnant due mid xx...” let him respond... then said I’m very excited about my new role and want to make sure I give ample prep time to ensure a smooth mat leave transition. Next week we are discussing dates of leave, but he seemed genuinely happy and supportive.