Hi FGB community!
I'm writing an article exploring what lessons women can take from 2020 and how they will use them in 2021, I'd love your help!
What is one lesson you've learned this last year and how will you use it to make for a better 2021?
If I use your comment, your name will appear in the article (or you can choose to remain anonymous!)
I'll start - one lesson I learned in 2020 is my optimism is greater than any life event going on around me. I will use this information to set better boundaries around negative people and energy sappers in 2021.
Thank you in advance! Can't wait to hear your answers!
6
55 Comments
55 Comments
Amy and Nancy Harrington
275
Women Support Women
11/06/20 at 8:01PM UTC
That human beings are adaptive and resilient. No matter what obstacles get thrown in our way, we can persist. And it's been a reminder that life is precious.
3
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 8:51PM UTC
I love this! Thank you
1
Reply
Eve Koopmann Odar
81
Thoughtful people leader, mom and wife
11/06/20 at 8:10PM UTC
To always look for the positive, I have seen my family more, cooked more, exercised more - the odd gift of having to slow down allowed me to actually think about where I spend my time vs where I want to spend my time and make the changes to do the later! That is a fun project - good luck.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 8:53PM UTC
Thank you, Eve. I am a natural extrovert so this time has also taught me to slow down and enjoy the people in front of me. Great lesson!
2
1 Reply
Lori Buckely
64
Creative Thinker & Transparent Problem Solver
11/06/20 at 9:27PM UTC
yes - slow down! Not everything has to be entertained, overscheduled, and busy. Time with family and a nice meal at the dinner table can carry so much value.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 9:40PM UTC
The family meals have been a huge way for us to reconnect during this time
Reply
Jocelyn Lyons
120
11/06/20 at 8:41PM UTC
One lesson I have learned is that my real priorities are being present with family. Too often we are so concerned with achievements (at work, school or otherwise) as a measure of success rather than seeing happiness and strong relationships with family as success. I now understand that the most important measure of success for me is being a present parent, wife, sister, and daughter.
3
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 8:53PM UTC
Jocelyn, this is beautiful. Thank you.
1
Reply
Debbie Higgins
39
Director Massachusetts
11/06/20 at 8:55PM UTC
My biggest lesson is to be grateful. The gift of time I was given to be home, enjoy family, reach out to old friends, more self- care, reading, cherishing the small things in life that we don't slow down enough to appreciate. This gift of time made me grateful for all the things I previously took for granted, that got lost in the shuffle of a busy life. It made me refocus on what is truly valuable in life: love , health, family. Nothing else matters
3
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 9PM UTC
You are absolutely right, Debbie. Thank you for sharing with us.
1
Reply
Brenda B.
18
Design + Build x Purpose
11/06/20 at 9:03PM UTC
We been very lucky with work, we are the busiest we ever been! I think that COVID has shifted things around and new opportunities are being presented, being work, family, new beginnings... I think that the best quality you can have in these times is of being flexible and embrace what ever challenges that are in front of you.
2
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 9:25PM UTC
That is awesome news about work, Brenda! And I think flexibility is a HUGE lesson we've learned this last year. Thank you for sharing!
2
Reply
Janet Benjamin
15
11/06/20 at 9:04PM UTC
My biggest lesson is to trust in myself that no matter what I can get to my destination and that my family is so important to just let them be. I should always be optimistic in the way I think and relate to things around me.
2
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/13/20 at 7:07PM UTC
Yes - I think optimism is huge! thank you
Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 9:27PM UTC
Janet - I have taken a huge step back this year in trying to control the outcomes for my teens and just let them be as well. It has had a profound effect on both of them - I've watched them bloom just by taking more of a hands-off approach. This has been a BIG one for me - letting go of the wheel a bit.
Thank you for your answer
1
1 Reply
Janet Benjamin
15
11/13/20 at 9:23PM UTC
Laurie- that's a great thing to do. Our teens only needs us to be their friends and they will be more relax with us. They'll even let us into their secrets. It is a good thing to do. Just be their best friend and you'll see how they'll appreciate you.
1
Reply
Kristen Olson
13
Product Manager with 13 years of eCom experience
11/06/20 at 10:18PM UTC
My biggest lesson this year has been to celebrate my accomplishments. It's always been hard for me to celebrate my own accomplishments and get recognition. But during COVID and working remotely it became even more difficult because no one is physically seeing me doing the work anymore. Ladies, always let everyone around you know when you've accomplished something!
2
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 10:34PM UTC
This is an awesome one. I think just in general a lot of women have trouble seeking validation and praise and as you stated, it's just gotten harder with being isolated at home offices. Yes - stand up for your accomplishements and shout them from the rooftop. these are all so good!
1
Reply
Bel Thompson
79
Experienced operations professional.
11/06/20 at 10:35PM UTC
I saw this on IG and reposted it because it is the absolute truth:
"I thought 2020 would be the year I get everything I want. Now I know 2020 is the year to appreciate everything that I have."
7
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 11:30PM UTC
What a great quote!!!! very accurate
1
Reply
Crystal Rhineberger
2.09k
professional rofl nevermind lets just wing it
11/06/20 at 11:19PM UTC
That no matter how evolved my grit and moxie is... it just gets even stronger!
2
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/06/20 at 11:31PM UTC
Yep - amazing how resilient we all can be, isn't it?
2
1 Reply
Crystal Rhineberger
2.09k
professional rofl nevermind lets just wing it
11/06/20 at 11:42PM UTC
Its actually pretty amazing to say well of all the things to weather... here I am yet again. This is going to be a success
2
Reply
Zulma
13
11/06/20 at 11:41PM UTC
My biggest lesson of 2020 would definitely be patience. I've learned to listen to understand not just listen to hear. Being more patient with people during this time. My team had never worked remotely and i had to be patient in making sure they were okay with it and everything was working positively for them. Another thing is taking mental health time for yourself. I live alone and covid kept me from everyone and depression set in and i would smile in front of everyone but cried at night because i felt so much more alone. Taking care of yourself is truly important. ;)
2
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:08PM UTC
Zulma - thank you for your brave reply and sharing your self-care. I think mental health time and self care right now is also my number one lesson coming out of this year. Thank you for your honest and vulnerable reply.
Reply
Carolyn Uzelac
33
Marketing Strategist with a passion for brands
11/07/20 at 12:30AM UTC
I learned that it's possible to slow down and 'leave things undone'. Our senior leadership team all went down to 70% pay (and theoretically, 70% time!), and for many months I continued to work at 110%... until I realised that maybe this was finally the time to address my significant work-life imbalance! I'm trying now to take a few more deep breaths and realise that what's 'urgent' (and what often becomes urgent due to others' lack of planning) should not take precedence over what's truly important for that day. And that regardless of what's important at work, what's happening with people needs to take priority!
2
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:09PM UTC
Yes!!! Right there with you. People over process. Love it
Reply
Anonymous
11/07/20 at 2:09AM UTC
Humility.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/13/20 at 7:09PM UTC
BIG one!
1
Reply
Anna L Garcia
30
Top 30 Performer | Diversity Champion | Mentor
11/07/20 at 4:43AM UTC
The biggest lesson of 2020 for me has been that we are beyond capable of adapting. We delivered impactful legacy and new programs virtually with great engagement and success.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:09PM UTC
Love this, Anna!
Reply
amanda mestrovich
24
11/07/20 at 10:49AM UTC
The biggest lesson I’ve learned this year is that setting myself up for tomorrow as much as I possibly can makes going through the day a million times easier. I wake up late and I’m rushing but yesterday’s me already set the coffee auto and made my lunch....
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:10PM UTC
Oh man, this is me too, Amanda. My coffee pot has never seen so much use on the auto setting! Thanks for sharing!
1
Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
11/07/20 at 12:09PM UTC
Hi Laurie! Great question. One thing I learn in 2020 is this, we as humans are terrible predictors of our emotions and the impact situations and circumstances would have on us. If we were asked this time last year, what you would do if you had to lock down for two months, we would have predicted the worst. Our ability to adapt and pivot is greater than our mind leads us to believe.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:10PM UTC
Jackie! What a wonderful observation. I agree. As Glennon Doyle would put it - we can do hard things!
Reply
Mary Donohue Miele
31
Dream Big, Dig Deep!
11/07/20 at 2:12PM UTC
The world is changing. I had to really take a look at who I am in these evolving times. I realized that I need to have more than one avenue to bring in leveraged income. With the world as it is today we are now moving in a new direction in the workplace. It’s time to flip the switch on the ways we do business. Days of sticking with one job at one place are slowly being replaced by the “gig” economy. Multiple avenues to stream in leveraged income.
I know longer want to trade time for money. I want to be a business owner securing my own financial future.
I’m working with a team to expand my company’s patents globally. The expanding of a new way of taking care of your health through Nutrigenomics & biohacking your DNA. A publicly listed company, with patents and in the pre-momentum stage.
Thanks,
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:11PM UTC
THiS. IS. AWESOME!
Reply
Monique Johnson, Ed.D.
158
Career Strategist and Principal DEI Consultant
11/07/20 at 2:25PM UTC
I've learned several lessons but the most important is to not take for granted the loved ones in your life because things can change so quickly. Make each moment count and spend less time worrying over things that don't matter. The other is that flexibility and agility are important qualities to possess in the workplace and in our day to day lives. It's enabled me to be even more compassionate to others.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:12PM UTC
Yes! As I keep telling my kids during distance learning, we are not necessarily learning about history, math etc here as much as we are learning resiliency and making the best of a difficult situation. thank you for sharing!
1
1 Reply
Monique Johnson, Ed.D.
158
Career Strategist and Principal DEI Consultant
11/11/20 at 2:48AM UTC
So true.
1
Reply
Little But Fierce
25
Versatile leader in New York City area
11/07/20 at 3:12PM UTC
I've learned that I love working from home 100%, but not everyone feels the same - some of my team members would rather be in the office, and will be happy when that's possible again. I've been enjoying turning inwards instead of outwards, being grateful for what I have while trying to help others in need through targeted donations while I still have a job. I feel like it's good karma to give while you can, and if there ever comes a day when you need help, help will be there for you too.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:13PM UTC
Yes and believe me, as an extrovert, turning inward is something I've been working on - not succeeding - but working on. Thank you for sharing!
Reply
Ellysa Smith
217
HR Engagement Curator
11/08/20 at 1:32AM UTC
One lesson I learned in 2020 is that despite how hard or difficult change can be, there are always blessings to be grateful for. Each trial is an opportunity to show faith, trust, and endurance in preparation for the next challenge.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:13PM UTC
I love this, Ellysa!
1
Reply
Danielle White
56
IT Ops professional at large
11/08/20 at 3:41AM UTC
It's worth trusting your heart and mind on taking a risk to have something better.
This one is part of a process that reaches back to 2015; it's a story of divorce to escape a bad relationship, moving half-way across the country for a new one without a job lined up, that one not working out, finding a new love (and marrying again) and finding a new job that I enjoy.
It was a risk that paid off but everyone was telling me not to take and felt embarrassed to a degree, like being told "it would be easier to say to your college-age niece why you were moving if you had a job lined up."
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:14PM UTC
Awesome story, Danielle! I am a HUGE fan of risk takers! So thrilled to hear of your happy ending!
Reply
Jodie Johnson
221
Integrity Matters!
11/08/20 at 2PM UTC
I went from member at a gym, to friends with the owner, to an instructor for her: Biggest mistake I ever made in a workplace! If someone can fake an entire friendship, you best believe they are faking competence in business and in their interpersonal lives.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:15PM UTC
So sorry to hear this, Jodie! Hoping things are heading in the right direction for you now?
1
1 Reply
Jodie Johnson
221
Integrity Matters!
11/11/20 at 12:50AM UTC
Thanks Laurie! Yes, it certainly is. All the best to you! ?
1
Reply
User deleted comment on 11/12/20 at 10:52PM UTC
Anonymous
11/08/20 at 2:15PM UTC
I learned I need to reinforce my boundaries between workplace and personal. Ensure coworkers understand my personal life is just that, my personal life. Video meetings do not open my personal life to questions or discussion.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:15PM UTC
Oh my goodness, do not even get me started on the Zoom meetings!
Reply
Tamara Roberts
15
11/08/20 at 3:02PM UTC
I have learned that what seems like simple knowledge to me isn't to everyone else. That everyone truly learns differntly. Someone ppl need pictures, some ppl need you to spell it out, some ppl need you to demo. For example how to wear a mask, what does quarantine really mean. Working as a nurse it is amazing when I get a patient with Covid and when people say yes I have been staying in this whole time, but then they go on to say they just had a dinner party or just went out to church and didn't wear their mask to churh because their faith would protect them. Or When you go in public and ppl think that moving their mask to talk quick is ok, or wearing under their nose is ok. Teaching teaching teaching.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:16PM UTC
THANK YOU for being on the front lines, Tamara!
Reply
Jasmine Stauffer
26
11/08/20 at 4:06PM UTC
Transparency and vulnerability are key when you’re struggling to meet expectations.... not every woman manager can understand your circumstance. My boss. a woman, doesn’t have children’s and hasn’t been able to grasp the fact that employees with children have more on their plate. Me being 100% transparent with her about my situation. Living in a politically charged hotbed, racial intentions and a pandemic it’s hard. But ok top of all of that general stuff, I’m awaiting a medical diagnosis and I’m getting a divorce. It can be hard to keep up with a lot of curve balls. Give them in an insight. Try to tell them how they can help you and be open to the feedback. You don’t know how you’re doing until someone tells you.
1
1 Reply
Laurie Halter
278
Helping women "rear" careers and families
11/10/20 at 5:17PM UTC
Wow Jasmine, you've had a lot thrown at you. Congrats on your resiliency and here's hoping your boss gets with it and backs you up in the way you deserve.
Reply
Looking for a new job?
Our employer partners are actively recruiting women! Update your profile today.
The Fairygodboss Feed
We're a community of women sharing advice and asking questions