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Anonymous
08/27/20 at 2:41PM UTC
in
Money

How to ask for Rent Money

I have 20 years experience in my profession, (finance) however due to the fact that I was not able to finish my degree, I know I am paid far less than many other people, not only in my work group, but throughout my company. I have never had discussions regarding how much any one person makes, but just simple conversations make the wage gap very apparent. For lack of a better way to say this, my biggest point of contention, is I am literally unable to afford to live anywhere without a roommate, and I am 41 years old. My midyear review is coming up, and I would just like some advice on how to bring this up with my supervisor, without seeming ungrateful, but also try to point out that I deserve to be able to afford my own home and my own space, and that the company is not providing me with the means to do so. I am just wondering if anyone has any ideas on how to bring this up, without making it sound too personal, even though it is. I am often told not only by my supervisor, but by many different people throughout our organization that I am appreciated, but I feel far less than that when I am not even afforded the opportunity to have my own home. Also, please note, if I am unable to afford my own place to live, suggestions on continuing my education are a moot point. Shelter is a basic human need we should all be able to afford regardless of education levels.

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Taylor444
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128
Project manager and relationship builder
08/31/20 at 5:46PM UTC
Totally agree with grnidone. It will likely be an uncomfortable conversation, but you NEED to do this. Also if you have any friends or family members who are willing to take the time, role play with them. (I personally hate role-playing these kinds of conversations but always regret it when I don't.) If possible role play with more than one person. When you speak to your supervisor, keep it professional (ie: about business) not personal. While you have some things you would like to personally achieve (home ownership, no roommates, etc) you have to keep it strictly about business - your living situation shouldn't be a part of the conversation. Tell them: I would like a raise of X%, and here's why. Do your research about industry standards, and bring those bullet points. List several projects you worked hard on that were a success. Talk about how many years experience you have both at your current company and in general. Don't second guess yourself, don't try to downplay anything. You got this. Good luck!
Sweet Caroline
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4.25k
08/27/20 at 11:46AM UTC
I will echo others, you should demand to be paid what you are worth and for that you need to do some research. You mentioned not having money for school, does your employer offer tuition reimbursement? Perhaps your ask is for them to pay for you to finish your degree if that matters in your role. I also wanted to add we cannot base our personal financial situation on others. I started out with nothing but college debt and a beat up old car when I graduated. At 41 I was not able to afford a house or pay my bills. That was a factor not of my salary which was fair but of the fact I started adult life heavily weighed down with debt while many of my peers started at zero or better had parents who helped them buy houses or at least not have to put car repairs on the credit card.
grnidone
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11
I'm a UX designer with a background in SEO.
08/25/20 at 11:56PM UTC
Everything Erin Thompson above said. Do NOT tell them you want a raise because you cannot afford a place to live. They will tell you to “budget better.” Also, don’t assume you’re not making the correct salary because you don’t have whatever degree. Unless management says that, that isn’t the reason you’re not paid what you should be. What it does sound like is that you’re not appreciated at your work and you should look for another place. It sounds like you’ve been there too long, and they have taken you for granted. The best way to get more money is to job jump. You’ve got plenty of experience, so do research and find out how much someone with that many years should make and ask for that. Do NOT tell the new place what you were making at this current job because it doesn’t matter and it’s only going to hurt you. You are going to ask for what is appropriate for your experience. I recommend looking up Liz Ryan and Human Workplace. She is a Human Resource Gutu and has excellent articles on Forbes and on her website as well as a podcast to teach you how to do all of this. Much of it is free. She would tell you that, really, the degree doesn’t matter. The experience does. So you GO!! You can do this!
Erin Thompson
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41
People-first Product Marketing Leader
08/25/20 at 9:15PM UTC
The best thing you can do is frame the conversation around the value you bring to the company and the market value for your work rather than your financial situation. Start by doing your research to really know what your market value should be (you can use payscale.com or glassdoor.com to get more info on this). It sounds likely you are being paid below market value for what you do. Use this information to negotiate your pay. Remember that the value you bring to the organization has much more to do with your performance than your degree(s). If you are performing just as well as colleagues without degrees, who should you be paid less? Just make sure to be well prepared for the conversation and know that you may have better opportunities else where if they won't pay you what you deserve. Best of luck! I know how hard these conversations are, but you got this!
KimmieFH
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799
Reach your goals through positive connections
08/25/20 at 3:58PM UTC
I think a great point to address to help strengthen your request will also be to have an answer for why this is coming up now. They might feel you've been getting along fine up to this point and start to wonder what has changed, don't let them make these stories up in their heads. My guess would be that it's a combination of slowly over time realizing the pay gap as well as an initial feeling that you will "show your worth" and the pay will follow. I would lean on the second one. Let them know that you didn't initially demand higher pay because you like the work and wanted to prove your worth and you expected it over time to come. Let them know that you focused on your responsibility to continually improve and because of that you bring A, B & C to the team at a great value, however, your focus has caused you to allow your pay to take a back seat. Let them know that this is not a new revelation because you need the money personally, but an overdue request which you take responsibility for your part in. definitely do your research and keep a realistic and understanding perspective. Budgets are a world I prefer not to work in, too much red tape and planning. Now is a good time to bring it up as they often are beginning to budget plan for the next year, if they are responsive but worried about budget, now is the time for them to add it to their requests. Be armed with an idea of what it would cost them to fill your position, the sad truth is most often pay gaps actually get filled when the position is refilled, annual raises do not keep up with cost of living increase and role value. If they need your position, it would cost them a LOT more to find a replacement than to just give you the raise. Let them know you understand this without totally threatening/burning bridges. Hopefully that is helpful, you got this! Good luck, and stay steadfast in your worth. If it's clear they will not value you properly start looking elsewhere.
Anonymous
08/24/20 at 8:21PM UTC
Do your homework. Find out what the pay is for comparable jobs in your location. Bring this up in your discussion for increased pay along with the value you bring to your job.
Bri Mosquera
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20
Law of Attraction Mindset Coach
08/24/20 at 5:45PM UTC
Hi! Thanks for sharing your story! I believe our relationship with money then affects how we talk about it and view it. When we come from a scarce mindset we cannot confidently ask for more because we subconsciously believe we don't deserve it. To create a more abundant mindset and feel confident in your request I would suggest to make a list of all the value you bring to your job. So when you make your request for a pay raise you feel like your worthy of it because you understand the value you bring and it gives you a confident boost. Asking for a pay raise doesn't mean your ungrateful rather you understanding your worth and advocating for yourself! Goodluck and sending you positivity your way!

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