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Anonymous

01/06/21 at 9:15PM UTC

Management

Sad at work

I have been unhappy at work since the day the management decided to downsizing my department. It used to be more of us in the department. I missed them - they were my work buddies. I have been trying to find me a new work buddy outside my department but no luck. I feel like I don’t fit in. I even missed my old bosses - I am not crazy about my current manager. I have been looking for a new job for over 3 years... I came close to get a new job at another company a few months ago. Too much competition in the job hunting world right now due to the pandemic. I feel hopeless because I can’t just quit. Please pray for me.

9 Comments

Anonymous

01/06/21 at 9:47PM UTC

Try and develop some outside interests that fill you with passion and joy. Keep growing as a person and put your energy somewhere other than your job to balance your life and provide you with enrichment and purpose. Try volunteering, meet up groups with similar interests, book clubs, hiking clubs. All these activities have been modified for our current restrictions. You'll find a rich and full life awaits you. Prayers are great but effort and action make an even greater impact in this situation.

Deepti

Engineering Manager in SoCal

01/06/21 at 9:57PM UTC

Praying ?

Rosa Carolina Pereira

Legal Counsel in Colombia

01/06/21 at 10:33PM UTC

I suggest you analyze our situation under a different perspective, try to look at the good things e.g. you have a job, you are probably doing something that you like and you have your own personal life. Things are changing fast now and we not always get what we want, but I am sure there are things that you can do to boost your energy and enjoy

Anonymous

01/06/21 at 11:54PM UTC

Without being tongue and cheek, I will pray that you find a way to adapt. It sounds like you had a good team - people with whom you liked working. It is an adjustment when this groove is disrupted due to organizational changes. But a disrupted groove does not mean you don't fit in but you do have to change your definition of the term. You were selected to stay in your department during a downsizing and companies do not make these decisions lightly. Unless you don't have to work this is not the time to take the fact that you have a job with a known (yet changed) company for granted. You are very fortunate. Learning a new manager's style can also be challenging and dispiriting especially when you had a good relationship with the previous one. Very few people get to work for the same person for an extended period of time. Change is a constant in the workplace. I'd focus on your work and on professional, rather than buddy, relationships and learn more about your new manager's style. If you have other career aspirations this is also an opportunity earn a paycheck and prepare yourself for future options when this all settles down. Your adaptability in your current new environment will be a plus just as any prolonged displays of angst or de motivation will be a definite minus.

1 Reply

r francis

01/07/21 at 1:31PM UTC

Very well said - focus on the positive and adapt - both good points to bring out - relationships will follow. It's a very tough time now for relationships (even for those that already have established relationships). Being apart does not bring a good environment for relationship building. I use slack as a way to say hello and hope everyone is doing well. This is a great way to break the ice and show you care. Good Luck and remain positive; it will get better.

Stephanie Chernoff

151

01/07/21 at 1:21PM UTC

If you’ve been mourning the loss of your work buddies for 3 years, I respectfully suggest that you seek counseling. This is not a healthy situation.

Anonymous

01/07/21 at 2:12PM UTC

One thing I've always told myself to get through tough times and if you are unhappy is to change what you can and learn to live with what you can't change. I just recently changed positions for better opportunities. I am really missing my previous supv and coworkers. So, I keep in touch with them and prod on with work even though I am sad too. Someone suggested seeing a therapist, I do this but have to say it is more difficult when you have to meet with them online or in a video chat. I think a lot of things are just harder with this pandemic. I will pray for you. I hope you find balance and hope you get a new position soon.

EMILY KIKUE FRANK

258

Emily is the founder of Career Catalyst

01/07/21 at 4:02PM UTC

What you're feeling is not uncommon after a round of layoffs or downsizing. There's probably a measure of "survivor's guilt" in addition to your missing of people, and since there is likely still the same amount of work that needs to get done, it's probably also more stressful than it was. I recommend working with a career counselor because, if you've been looking for 3 years without success, it's likely you're not approaching the search as well as you could be. In light of the pandemic, many folks in my profession are offering sliding fee scales, too, so check out your options! And best of luck.

User deleted comment on 01/07/21 at 11:53PM UTC

Anonymous

01/07/21 at 11:54PM UTC

Don't leave your current job until you get an offer. Get your resume up to date, and look for a new job. Try not to focus on "work buddies." You cannot control who you get to work with because work buddies will come and go. Be passionate about a hobby or activities outside of work. Focus on your career path, and study how to achieve your career goals. Yes, prayer works.