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Is it worth leaving a toxic job for my mental health?
I thought this job was going to be my "dream job," but it's become a source of anxiety, stress, and overall dissatisfaction. Yet the pay and benefits are great and it's a great stepping stone in my career. Every day I go back and forth between staying and quitting, but recently it's taken such an even worse toll on my mental health.
Has anyone else experienced this? What did you do?
Aurora Meyer
Accredited Public Relations Professional
317
08/17/20 at 5:42PM UTC
I've also experienced this twice in my professional career (18 years). The first time was the impetus to get out of a toxic field (journalism) and into a field more aligned with the things that make me happy and give me the time and energy to pursue hobbies. The second was on paper a perfect fit and a title increase and initially a great management fit but in reality the responsibilities were a step down and once the glossy veneer cracked and my stress levels increased, I knew it was time to leave. It was hard to give up the benefits but so worth it for my stress level and happiness.
Authum RoweYoga Teacher/Motivator
18
08/04/20 at 6:13PM UTC
OMG! I have been in that situation twice in my adult life. All I can say is having those awesome benefits isn't worth that mental frustration only you have to deal with and most of the times in silence. Your dream job will have you only go through obstacles that help you grow, not keep you down. Sometimes what we think is a dream job is really a chapter in your life that is preparing you for what is actually meant for you. My advice to you is if you can find ways to de-clutter after work until you are able to figure out what best for you, it can help make a difference and maybe open up new paths that you weren't noticing before.
Stacey M. WoodsSVP, HR Operations in Charlotte, North Carolina
17
08/02/20 at 10:49PM UTC
Go inward... relax...breath and try to untangle why the job is causing so much stress. Is it the people or the work? What can you change to foster a better situation for yourself? Is there someone you can speak to? Health over everything. The money, benefits, etc. means nothing at all if you are not in a healthy position to enjoy. Please take care of yourself. All the best to you.
Allix StewartHuman Rights Graduate Student & Resume Developer
193
08/02/20 at 6:47PM UTC
As someone who has previously been in a work position where my mental health absolutely tanked, I think it's beneficial to weigh the pros and cons of leaving now with where you feel you currently are mentally and emotionally. If this is putting an enormous strain on you and the benefits of quitting now outweigh everything else, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. If you feel like you have more wiggle room to start looking for other positions and can hang in there a bit longer, that may be worth the extra income and health insurance while you actively pursue something else. Either way, if this is negatively impacting your health, regardless of whether this is a great stepping stone, it's time to go. As someone who has experienced debilitating mental health from my previous job, I encourage you to look elsewhere. As many before me have mentioned, your health ALWAYS comes first!
KelleyHigher Education professional in Upstate NY
306
07/31/20 at 1:30PM UTC
Your mental health and health in general are most important! I, too, was in a toxic situation with work. The stress and anxiety became so great that I had my first ever panic attack and was being to have physical ailments. I even had a doctor tell me that I should try to find a new position because my particular ailment was unlikely to get better unless I could reduce my stress levels. What I did was develop close friendships with certain coworkers and we confided in each other and helped lift each other up. In the meantime, I also looked for new work. My recommendation is to find the parts of the job or your connections with certain coworkers that keep you lifted as you can hopefully look for something that fits better in terms of the environment and not just the position.
Jessica WaltherBurnout Survivalist & Coach
13
07/30/20 at 4:11PM UTC
Absolutely. Your mental health comes first. I left a job for similar reasons, and it was the best thing I ever did. I unfortunately let my indecision to leave go on for so long that I developed PTSD and had to take medical leave. I too was in my "dream job" with the fancy title and pay...and I was miserable. Now I'm REALLY in my dream job working for myself which was ONLY possible by putting myself first. Happy to chat directly if you wish. I didn't have all the pieces worked out before leaving, I just trusted my gut went forth. Good for you realizing you need a change in your environment.
Erin GarganoBanking & FinTech Executive
62
07/30/20 at 2:47PM UTC
I would encourage you to really take the time to think through & reflect on what was good about it & what was not both with this role & the last role(s). Challenge yourself as to whether you could influence & make those changes within your current role before jumping - could you lead & help influence positive change. If not, because it is outside of your control, then create a narrative of what you want & need with your next move & then start to target and interview for those opportunities. Good luck!
Sandra PlacideBusiness Continuity Analyst
58
07/29/20 at 9:57PM UTC
Your post really hit home. One thing stands out is your expectation that it would be your "dream job." It's important to reassess what your expectations were going in and if they were realistic If THEY gave you an impression of what to expect during the interview process that they have not fulfilled; then you should call them out on it. Ultimately your mental health is paramount. If you're leveling-up to experiencing physical symptoms like gut-aches, headaches, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, panic attacks or other; then you have to decide how and when to leave. I left a toxic job situation only AFTER I saved several months salary to cover my expenses. I left without another job, took time to regroup, then started my own company a few months later. Best wishes on your journey!
Brandy BeauchampA day is successful if you have learned.
109
07/29/20 at 5:17PM UTC
Absolutely! I have been there and it is one of the hardest things I have ever done. Such stress and anxiety in the situation and then compound that by a thousand when thinking of what is next. I suggest you start applying now if you have not already. Ride it out as long as you can while you make adjustments in your home life. Save money, get on budget plans with utilities if needed, look at your savings, etc. Be prepared to be out of work for a while in the current situation. Plan as much as you can. You can try unemployment if you feel you have a case with the toxic environment after you quit but don't count on it. Keep any documentation you may have that supports your decision if possible. Either way I can personally tell you the minute you send that email/have that conversation you will start to heal and feel better once you realize the possibilities again.
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