early twenties confused
i moved to Belfast to do my masters degree over two years ago and was supposed to move back to my home place (Galway) once I was done. I started bank shifts as a project worker in a homeless hostel as some extra cash but fell in love with the role, now two promotions later I ADORE my job but I miss Galway so so much, and for someone young I have reached a very high position in my company and love that feeling of importance and passion for my work. But outside of work I am homesick and very little support system (in a very stressful job working with complex people which requires your own cup to be filled) . My boyfriend, family and close friends are all a 5 hour drive from me and it’s getting so hard but I’m not sure id get the same career opportunity in Galway. Should I value my personal and social life more? Or stick it out and get the experience for as long as I can to bring home, at the sake of my well-being??
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Anonymous
Hi,
Your life must be made up of something other than going to work and returning home in the evenings.
I did some googling and realized that Belfast has a larger population and size than Galway. Therefore, I understand why you believe you might not find a comparable opportunity in Galway.
You have already noticed that my first statement is true because you mention that you are homesick and have no support system. That "support system" you are referring to is what keeps people healthy, mentally and physically. At any age (20s, 30s, 40s…), you need more than just work in your life to feel whole.
You might believe that going home will make you whole (gaining access to your support system), and for some, that might be true. Some could return home and spend their lives happily close to their support system. However, some could return home, and years later, the inner need to grow and feel challenged professionally eventually eats away at their spirit.
Therefore, before you return to Galway, ask yourself what you have done to become a part of the Belfast community. For example, Churches have groups with various focuses like charity work where you could do some good and meet some great people. Go back to your university and get involved in the Alum activities. Try volunteering at the local library, hospital, or a non-profit. Any of these actions will help you to become ingrained in the community and help you build a support system.
Remember, as we age, our support systems will change as our needs develop. Many people experience being homesick as they age but filling that void with a great support system and, of course, taking vacation time to go home is how we grow.
Listen, I'm in the US and know what small-town America is, and I know my preferences. In high school, I read works by Shakespeare and have forever embraced one line from Hamlet: " To thine own self, be true."
Good luck….
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