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Telling my boss I job might not be a good fit?
Six months ago, I took a promotion. I was nervous and excited about the role and challenges it would bring. My boss is very hands off, which I generally appreciate -- but I’m not positive that I’m the right person for this role.
Especially because over the last few months I’ve been realizing that in retrospect, the idea of taking the role was much stronger than my actual passion for the role. My direct team needs a confident manager, especially amidst the constant changes and I feel like I’m letting them down.
What's also hard about this is that I know my boss had really high hopes and expectations for me and I’m not sure how to begin such a conversation that’ll lead to such disappointment. When I took the role, my boss did say there would be other opportunities I could transition to if this doesn’t work out. So essentially, I know what I need to do, I just can’t get myself to do it. Any guidance, thoughts, or advice on how to bring this up?
Leigh Nightingale
Enabling Creative Entrepreneurs to Thrive!
52
06/16/20 at 4:51PM UTC
I suggest you consider getting some coaching. Coaching helps identify your strengths and areas for improvement, where your heart really is, and it helps you to create new possibilities. Don't make yourself wrong here - you're learning and I'm sure you have a lot to offer your manager and your team - even if you don't feel as though you do.
Having an accountability partner (coach) can really help you gain clarity and identify what your next steps are. There's a plethora of coaches out there - do some research, find someone that is in alignment with your values and go thrive!
LEANNE TOBIASInvestment real estate/sustainability
4.05k
06/09/20 at 7:28PM UTC
Whew, difficult situation to be in— and are you really sure that you are in a situation?
1. Given that you’ve been leading your team for 6 months without any negative feedback from your admittedly hands-off manager, you are very likely doing a reasonably good job. Before you speak with your boss, make sure that you are not acting from fear and a lack of confidence, rather than a performance lapse. It is very possible that you are experiencing impostor syndrome— the mistaken belief that you are not worthy of promotion and are not doing your job well. (High-performing professional women are especially susceptible to impostor syndrome.) A great book on the subject is The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women, by Valerie Young.
2. In a similar vein: before resigning as a manager, is there any type of management training or coaching that you could utilize to build your skills and confidence? Ideally, your company would provide, pay for or reimburse you for this training and it is frequently provided to new managers. Before asking for training or coaching, identify the skills you’d like to learn and an example or two of the type of course/s or coaching that would benefit you.
Taking the above two steps might resolve your problem more constructively than leaving your current role.
3. But if it ultimately turns out that management is not for you and that you are set on leaving this role, develop a strong transition plan before speaking with your manager. This includes:
-Committing to stay in your current role until the new manager is hired and trained.
-At the option of your manager, recruiting/helping to recruit and training your successor.
-Identifying your new role up front and training/preparing for it as you recruit/help recruit and train your successor.
Mindy GreenOn Air Beauty Expert, MUA, Hair Stylist
441
06/09/20 at 6:56PM UTC
This is a tough one. I’ve been new to role in a promotion, and at times it can be challenging. Give yourself room to be new and learning a new role. You can’t expect yourself to know all the answers, you just have to know where to get the answer. I think you need at least a year to decide it’s not a good fit. Having leadership experience is a good thing. It shows the ability to take on bigger responsibility and accountability.
If your boss hired you, they think you have what it takes to do the job. You have to believe that too. You have to remember that you earned your seat at the leadership table.
But, If you realize that you don’t like leadership, then really assess what it is that you don’t like. There are things about leadership that weren’t great, but part of the job. For me, overall the good outweighed the bad. If you feel like there is more bad than good, you should rethink your career.
Check into those other opportunities and see the availability. If there is something available now, I think it will be easier to open the door to that conversation with your manager. Take some time to make sure getting out is really what you want and not just a temporary feeling. If it is, take steps to make it happen. You have to live your life and be happy.
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