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Anonymous
01/30/20 at 1:41PM UTC
in
Management

Unprofessional comments

Hi, all. When I had to call off work to take care of my husband, he fell, my manager made a comment that I felt was unprofessional. It was my second call off in as many months. She said, 'again, this seems to be an issue with you, doesn't it.' Maybe this job is not a good fit for you.' When my coworker wanted to go home early, she told her, ' you sure get sick a lot.' This was the second time in a year my coworker was using sick time.' It seems like she tries to bully us into staying. I dont know if I should confront her about this or not. Your thoughts on this please.

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Dana Barnes
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213
Academic and Career Advisor
02/09/20 at 4:05PM UTC
After reading your discussion, this does appear to be a form of bullying you are encountering in the workplace. If I were you, I would document what is being said by your manager and include the date and time it was said. Next, I would review the policies for sick time and vacation time. If you have questions regarding the policies, you should consult with the HR department at your employer. You should also find out the proper channels for reporting your manager’s unprofessional behavior if you feel comfortable doing that.
Susan Morgan
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39
Data and Analytics Manager in Indianapolis
01/31/20 at 1:05PM UTC
Work through your HR. If HR is not supportive, I would consider finding another place to work.
Maggie B
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983
Business and Data Analysis Consultant
02/04/20 at 7:51PM UTC
^^^ THIS.
Madam anon663
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1.5k
Learner, skeptic, direct.
01/31/20 at 12:53PM UTC
Don't forget though, HR works for the company, not you, so inform yourself of policies and be your own best advocate.
Anonymous
01/30/20 at 6:20PM UTC
Thank you, all. I appreciate your feedback and suggestions. The time off is within policy. We are allowed 4 sick days per year. My only problem is that hr is in South Carolina and I'm in California. I will reach out to them for clarification. I think that would be my best action. The manager has been with the company for 20+ years, so I'm sure they will have her back as opposed to mine. I will address it as an inquiry, to make sure I'm following policy.
Liz Shannon
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130
Accountant- Budget Analyst-Reconciliations
01/31/20 at 1:03PM UTC
Good grief! Only four sick days per year, and they’re harassing you for taking them? That just doesn’t seem like an environment where an employer cares about their employees well-being at all. Is there any possibility that you have the time or the motivation for a job hunt? Because honestly it just doesn’t seem like this is a very good company to work for. My current employer offers 12 sick days per year. My last employer offered 10 sick days per year. I would encourage you to look for an employer who is more interested in maintaining a work life balance for their employees, to keep them both mentally and physically healthy. Good luck!
User deleted comment on 01/31/20 at 12:43PM UTC
Jemia Williams
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452
DEI Practitioner | Social Media | Writer
01/30/20 at 10:39PM UTC
I would make this a priority to call as early as you can. And if HR is giving preferential treatment to someone based on company tenure that is also against company policy and also the law. You also have additional benefits being a California resident, so I would inquire about those as well.
Anonymous
01/30/20 at 4PM UTC
That is concerning - and here is how I would handle it. When you go to HR, ask them for guidance, ask them if maybe you're 'interpreting policies' and maybe missing something. What I'm trying to say is "play ignorant' and 'ask' - no one ever wins when you make it a problem with your manager. Companies protect management. Your goal is to fit in, be collaborative and make sure you're understanding. Yes, I am ABSOLUTELY telling you to be political. But if you think about it...when someone asks you to help understand something versus complaining, don't you feel better about the situation? I promise you, it will create a perception that you're a committed, agreeable person who wants to be a successful employee.
Anonymous
01/30/20 at 6:21PM UTC
Thank you
Anonymous
01/30/20 at 9:27PM UTC
Hang in there! We've all had our share of challenging managers. Sounds like she needs coaching from your HR group.
Anonymous
01/30/20 at 3:56PM UTC
Here I am going to suggest HR and reading the comments; it looks to be a pretty standard though. Bullying is unacceptable anywhere and don't let a manager do this to you. Even if they think they're being funny when saying it; it certainly is not. Take em to HR. I'd suggest radical feedback, but it sounds like this person is somewhat combative. I'd get HR involved before you potentially hurt your career by addressing it personally. You got this.
Anonymous
01/30/20 at 3:39PM UTC
The comment isn't just unprofessional, it's a form of intimidation. Personal time off, sick leave, and vacation time off are all part of your benefits package. She's trying to actively discourage people who work under her from using their benefits when they need to. That's concerning. If it happens again I'd consult HR.
Reba Shahan
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45
Part Social Worker Part Cruise Director
01/30/20 at 4:39PM UTC
I was thinking this too - a form of bullying, if you ask me.
Elina Beck
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99
IT Management professional in all aspects of IT.
01/30/20 at 3:34PM UTC
If you are within the company parameters, then it is part of your compensation, and should be in the same category as making you feel bad about cashing your pay check.
Emily Gurney
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131
01/30/20 at 3:09PM UTC
I agree with the two above comments. I believe by law a manager or boss is not allowed to ask you or give push back on you taking days off that you have. If you get push back on it again I would go to HR.
cms1234
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203
01/30/20 at 2:03PM UTC
Ugh... what a rotten thing to experience. Another answer? "No, it's not an issue with me - at all. I've actually only taken days allowed under our policy. And, this request is because my husband fell and can't move." Your HR department must give days off for various personal reasons that can't be planned: sick, family member hurt, etc. In Massachusetts, you the Small Necessities Act to cover days like this. Bottom line is your boss doesn't like people taking any time off. Despises it. I know the type. Hold your head up, and just follow the leave policies. Boss might be salty, but you're in compliance. Good luck!

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