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Rumors About my Promotion
I work in a pretty male dominated company, and they are almost no women in management. The ones that are in management are 20-30 years older than me and have been with the company a long time.
I just got promoted and I am in my 20s. What is supposed to be a major accomplishment and stepping stone in my career has gone awry. Some people are saying that the only reason I was promoted was because I was a woman and they are trying to check a box. Some of my colleagues asked what "I did to earn my promotion", insinuating I slept with someone for it. Other people have said I've been given an unfair advantage because of the women's movement right now and that a lot of great male candidates were passed on to give the job to me.
I'd love any advice on how to combat this. I've worked really hard to get here, and I feel really defeated right now.
Six Figure Salary Coach
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947
05/02/19 at 1:24AM UTC
First and foremost, congratulations! That's a huge accomplishment and don't let what other people are saying dilute how you should feel about it! You should be very proud. You're young, driven, successful and that is something to be celebrated!
Don't let jealous and insecure people dictate how you feel about yourself or this opportunity.
I've been where you are! When I was in my twenties, there was a pretty clear assumption that I got my promotions because I was sleeping with my boss (which I wasn't obviously). It was terrible! But I knew that all those conversations were coming out of places of jealousy and I prevailed!
Now that I'm in my thirties, when I get my promotions it's because I am "aggressive and intimidating"..... or some other negative word to communicate that I am F**king good at my job!!
People always look at women and wonder how they got their job... There's always some underlying reason Beyond just the fact that we are incredible contributors to our company's success has!
And even if it was because you're a woman, I'm not saying it was... But please keep reading... Even if it was because you are a woman who cares! Men have been enjoying those privileges since the dawn of time. I always say if we have an asset that gets us in the door then it is up to us to prove why we deserve to be there!
I was hired for my very first job because my boss actually DID want to sleep with me. He told me that later on in my career... CLASSY. However I honestly didn't care. I used the assets I had to get in the door and turned it into earning my seat at the table. They let me be there because they wanted to sleep with me and while I was there I made some major contributions along the way.... To the point that they couldn't function as efficiently without me. It is an abnormal way to look at how women are sexualized but I look at it as a commodity. If they gave you your job just to balance out some Employment Equity initiative... Who cares! You are there to pave the way for women in the future and that's amazing!
In my current role I'm the only female manager in the entire organization. That's sad! I've been told countless times that the men need to get used to it it's like having a woman around. I'm fascinated that these comments come out in this day and age. However it is something that I'm proud of!
I know that this is a long rant at this point LOL. Don't let these things tear you down. Take these jealous people put them behind you and pave your own Road! You will go far!
If you ever need a mentor or support please reach out
Xo
Melissa
Sierra ModroTechnical curriculum development manager
465
04/30/19 at 8:01PM UTC
When you say "people are saying..." - which people? Does it matter?
For instance, if people in your upper management chain say that, it's a cause for concern. If jealous former peers say it, that's a different story.
I've had similar situations happen in my past, and the biggest thing that shut people up was showing immediate success in the new role, AND if someone asked "what I did to get there" I'd look them dead in the eye and say, "I worked my butt off on important projects. I showed the drive and initiative worthy of a promotion." Own your accomplishments! That's why you got the promotion, and that will (usually) shut up the naysayers.
On a related note, I have a notebook where I keep all of the positive comments and stories. When I start feeling bad, I read things from my past that remind me that I have done some seriously cool stuff - sometimes stuff no one else knows about but me. That journal helps me stay balanced. I only add things on occasion, but it's always there when I need it.
© 2022 Fairygodboss. All rights reserved.