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Ashlie Bowman
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41
mom of 2 boys and work full time
02/13/20 at 4:32PM UTC
in
Career

Failing

I feel like I am failing. I have applied for many, many, many jobs. I resign because of a toxic work place that was breaking me down and making me feel like nothing. I have interviewed and thought they went well and still have not landed anything. What am I doing wrong.

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Anonymous
02/14/20 at 5:19PM UTC
I've been job searching for almost 9 months (after getting laid off). I was with a toxic company and although I know everyone here sincerely means the best, it is harder to not be working... Even though I wasn't happy with my job, it has been way way way more difficult to worry about finances. I have reached out to my network for support, have gone to career fairs, etc and nothing is working out. I have no advice for you but I did want you to know you aren't alone!
Elizabeth
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71
Just do it
02/13/20 at 11:16PM UTC
This just happened to me on Monday. I did the same thing for the same reasons. Although it has only been a few days, and landing a job doesn’t happen overnight for many, I’ve been stressed out myself. I can’t say I relate because it’s only been a few days. But the way I’m feeling for not a few days, i can only imagine how you must be. You are not failing!! Our job market is. Keep your head up and don’t give up no matter how hard it gets!
morales971
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430
An essential worker for the power of positivity.
02/13/20 at 7:10PM UTC
I'll share with you one of the best pieces of knowledge I've read recently (from "Everything is Figureoutable" by Marie Forleo): Failure is an event; not a circumstance. You are not failing. You are still in this game. Keep going. I just spent over a year and a half exactly where you are now, and for the exact same reasons. There were times it felt like I was, literally, cursed to fail. But you have to keep going, if for no other reason than what, exactly, is the alternative? To give up? No, you are more than that. In fact, there's only one of YOU in the whole world and that's amazing. Keep going. Keep applying. Work with multiple recruiters; create more than one resume for more than one career; network; apply to work remotely on sites like Upwork; take on a part-time job...for now. But keep going. If I can get past these trials, so can you. 100%. Good luck!
Anonymous
02/13/20 at 7:30PM UTC
Thank you for taking the time to write something so kind and inspirational like that. I needed to read that today. Good luck to everyone on their journey.
Allison Branen
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106
Experienced Marketing Professional
02/13/20 at 7:02PM UTC
Ashlie, This is the time to lean on your friends and former colleagues. Ask them to write references on your LinkedIn profile; to review your resume (and LI profile) and provide feedback; for help with practice interviews—particularly to find the best way to discuss why you resigned; and of course, ask them to be on the lookout for roles that align with your skills. Hang in there! Allison
Susana Pablo
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285
02/13/20 at 4:53PM UTC (Edited)
How are you are failing, if you are trying? Give yourself credit for applying and making it to interviews. Navigating the new job journey is bound to be stressful. Trust the process. What are you learning from each experience? Peace Begins Within Have you made peace within regarding the past workplace experiences? Recovering from a toxic workplace environment is draining. It takes resilience to continue focusing on what you accomplished quantitatively and qualitatively in the previous role. Processing the prior experience with a career coach and/or professional counselor can help. Support System Does everyone in your network know you are seeking a new meaningful role and what skills you want to use in a new role? Have you met with your references and asked them for additional support? Networking is key to unlocking opportunities. Surround yourself with supportive people who know your strengths. I pray a new door opens soon as you persist in your search. Aim to stay positive and proactive. Blessings, sp
Ashlie Bowman
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41
mom of 2 boys and work full time
02/13/20 at 7:16PM UTC
I have only told my close friends. I havnt even told my family I resigned from my job. I am afraid if I put it out there then maybe I will let them down. I know sounds strange. My close friends have helped me some. My hubby wants me to find work that I’m going to enjoy not just a job. I feel as if I’m letting my kids down financially.
Susana Pablo
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285
02/13/20 at 10:35PM UTC (Edited)
Ashlie, thanks for sharing your journey. It seems like you are experiencing a great deal of grief with such a significant transition; this is to be expected. It will take time to heal and the more support you have the better. The additional comments provided on this thread should provide you with some encouragement. Continue to pace yourself.
Anonymous
02/13/20 at 4:38PM UTC
I’ve been in a similar situation. Unfortunately my only advice would be that it takes time. I had several toxic work environments and I had to do a check of what did these places have in common so I can avoid them in the future.
Ahderman
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275
02/14/20 at 3:05PM UTC
I recently went through the very same thing! It just takes time. Unfortunately, it’s a numbers game. Please, don’t feel like you’re failing! No one should have to put up with toxic work environments! Just hang on. I know it’s hard: those rejections aren’t personal. Trust me. I know it may seem unbelievable. It may even seem bleak. But, please, please remember it’s just a numbers game, and that mandatory online hiring/application makes the process frustrating and more drawn-out. You haven’t failed anyone or anything. It’s your job that failed you.
Ashlie Bowman
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41
mom of 2 boys and work full time
02/13/20 at 7:14PM UTC
Did you ever find a common ground? I was with the company for 6 years.

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