Own Time.

Have you ever been afraid about being left behind by your friends and past classmates? Seeing them being successful while here you are stuck in the corner not knowing which path are you going to take? Here's what, I graduated college and study again for another 6 months to prepare for a board examination and I passed! Everyone was so happy I achieved their expectation and since I passed the exam the expectation gets higher and higher "she will surely be succesful in life!", "she'll have a great job for sure!" "She will surely have high salary!", what they don't know is that i'm still confused what will I become, I thought it would be easier but it gets tougher every single time. I was crying every night afraid of not being successful, afraid of disappointments, afraid of not being good enough. Then finally i decided to apply a job and I was invited for an interview! I am so happy that's my dream job omg, they just hired me! But something came up I needed an immediate operation and it requires one whole month to recover. Again I was lost and disheartened, and another job offer came up, i failed but it's fine I don't like the job anyway and many more . Then another job offer! I told myself finally! I was already completing my requirements and when my medical result came out, it feels like i was showered with iced water, I can't uttered a word my mind was blank, I was diagnosed with Hepatitis B, a lifetime liver disease. It feels like my life was shuttered. I was crying on my way home and my mom told me we'll get second opinion and still it was positive. I am so afraid I'm not getting enough sleep I can't eat properly my 50kg weight dropped to 45 kg in just a week. I don't want to wake up anymore. I just want to lie down in bed whole day. I don't want to face everybody. I feel like I was a big disappointment. But I saw a book from a book sale and it says "In God possibilities are not necessary so do not be afraid, He has plan just wait." That became my wake up call, I fixed myself I received a good news my liver is fine and the doctor told me I can still work like normal people do.I applied another job not thinking of anything but the thought that if God want's me to be here then good and if not it's okay I'll surely find another one. Then I decided to passed my resume in a therapy center (my dream job! behavior therapist). I was a bit nervous but that time, thinking if I would tell them my health condition. So when the hr asked me you have any health problem? I said yes, but doctor said its fine! I was praying like please God if this is for me I will gladly accept it and if not, its fine I'll leave to you all the decision I trust in you. Then the HR smiled at me saying "Okay I'll see you on Monday for your training!". I am so happy and grateful and realizes that we all have our own time, I don't have to compete with others because I have my own story, I have my own future to build, there's no need to rush, Surely God has planned our life even before we step our feet in this world, just trust Him and let Him lead your way. For all the job failures thank you I am here where I am today!