Feel stuck and want to move but husband wants to stay put
July 22,2020 at 12:12AM UTC
Need help please!
I am recently married after being with my current husband for 6 years. He is so special so loving caring reactive to anything that bothers me and will change immediately he’s a positive person who works hard and always has me and our future family in mind. He’s amazing and so special in all the important ways and the characteristics that are I think at least hard to find and important to me.
We both grew up in the same city and went to the same high school ( although officially met later). My dream has always been to live in New York.
However he is five years older than me has been able to leave to law school out of state. He then moved back and that is when we met- when he was ready to date and to begin to settle down and think about the long term.
I went to graduate school my program was one year long half in New York and half in DC. Being there even if for just four months confirmed how much I loved it and how much I wanted to live there.
I graduated moved back to Miami for about a year and then found a temporary job in New York so we did the long distance- we were lucky enough to be able to see each other every weekend. I moved back to home and when I got back I got back I immediately felt some sense of wanting to go back but I knew it was difficult on the relationship. Shortly after my then fiancé got the job of his dreams in our hometown. I was still unhappy about the city we lived in but was trying to be reasonable and understanding - a comprise I thought. I had my moments though and at one conversation he agreed that he would stay put for 3 years and we would re-evaluate moving.
It has since been two and a half years.
His goal was to buy a house which always in the back of my mind made me feel like we’d be even more stuck here- and last week we moved into a new place which I am very grateful for of course but at the same time it constantly feels like a life I didn’t want. And I knew that I would become more stuck with time and the idea of moving he thought would he lost on me but I think about it daily.
Now we just moved into this new place and Covid is happening now in the midst of all this and I’m not sure how I can continue to be ok with not moving to a city where I feel I need to be.
Please share any suggestions you may have - desperate for opinions or guidance it’s very difficult to speak to loved ones about this as my husband has become a part of my family.
(I think it might be time to see a therapist too lol!)
Send help please!
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