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Irine Sussman
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826
08/13/20 at 2:26PM UTC
in
Career

Why the most successful leaders care about being "likeable", not "liked"

We all want others to like us. We value what others think about us and want to feel accepted. Yet in a workplace, these feelings can lead us astray from achieving our goals. When a leader only cares about being "liked", they'll avoid tough conversations and decisions to spare others' feelings. Yet constructive criticism is necessary for employees to grow and meet their goals, and difficult decisions — which not everyone on the team likes — have to made in order for the company to progress and grow. Successful leaders know that the way they lead won't always make everyone like them. But they know they're making the right decisions for their team and the company. And they know they can still be "likeable" — friendly and caring — while not being "liked." Do you find you're worried about being "liked" at work? How have you tried to become more "likeable" than "liked"?

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Melissa Vance Marchon
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36
Remote Operations Manager
08/13/20 at 2:37PM UTC
Thank you for sharing this! I used to want to be liked by my employees and it usually resulted in poor performance and me being walked all over. Now, I focus on being more likeable by expressing empathy but still being fair when it comes to policy and performance standards. I believe I've finally found that balance.

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