How to deal with ambiguity

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Anonymous

01/04/21 at 9:26PM UTC

Career

How to deal with ambiguity

Hi all , I have had a very good career for the past 13 years. I have been told I was a leader, fast learner, confident, I take up projects and complete them etc. Till I joined my current role. Though it is a role I like and enjoy, I have completely lost my confidence. I see increasingly cases where I get ambiguous emails with no clarity or direction. With no specific detail in the task assigned to me. I maybe expected to figure it out on my own. But I am unable to. Usually follow up questions are also maybe purposely ambiguous. Not to mention that my manager send me an email saying I am not doing well. Expecting things outside of my role. And compared me with every single colleague of mine saying they were better than me. This has shattered my confidence. I question everything I am doing. And even the minor stuff like replying to an email. Feels like a mammoth task. Where to begin to build my confidence?

8 Comments

Anonymous

01/04/21 at 10:14PM UTC

I think you need to set up a call or multiple calls immediately following a new assignment to review your assignment, get all immediate questions answered and show your initiative and to follow-up as you progress. It looks like you're expected to take the "ownership " role and that means filling in missing info, details and expectations. You are expected to put things together and that means knowing what questions to ask. They are cutting you lose to make your mark. Your follow-up, follow through and delivery of end product matching expectations should signal, not only your engagement, but your commitment and expertise in owning projects soup to nuts. Immersing yourself in your projects will give you that confidence and sense of control that only owning a project can offer. It's go time. Speak with some of your highly regarded colleagues for pointers and even support. Showing them your desire to excel and looking to them as examples of excellence will give them the sense of leadership and mentoring if approached the right way. They might offer tips from their experience, advice in where to find missing details, etc. With a couple of stellar projects under your belt, you'll get yourself back on track. You need to engage on a much deeper level to prove to yourself you've got this in spades. While it's nice to get assignments will every detail fleshed out, project leads seldom are so lucky. It's a new year and greater gains and leadership are expected in most jobs today and you can step up your game more than you realize.

3 Replies

Anonymous

01/04/21 at 10:36PM UTC

Awesome! They want to see you run with it. Sometimes we think we are to be fed all the details when we really need to show resourcefulness and ingenuity. If you have to be told you're a leader then you don't really KNOW it. That's why a difficult call with your manager can rock your world.

Grace L

Filipino Virtual Assistant

01/05/21 at 1:30AM UTC

I totally agree on this comment. Asking more questions about a project doesn't mean you lack understanding. It just means that you want to get clear, specific directions and set expectations for yourself and your client. Don't be afraid to ask more detailed questions to get a clearer picture of what is the expected output. Good luck!

Chanelle Lafreniere

01/09/21 at 2:51AM UTC

Brilliant advice!!

Nicole Galbraith

Recruitment Marketing + Working Mom

01/05/21 at 12:51AM UTC

Lack of confidence is something we all struggle with from time to time. You are new to your role and it sounds like you're new to your manager. You might be in the thick of the learning curve. Ramp up communication with your manager and maybe even some successful team members. Is there someone on your team who is doing really "well" who can mentor you? Are you crystal clear on the areas of improvement, or do you need more clarity? I would start asking more questions and start leaning on others. I would also get to know your manager and his/her expectations in order to adapt your communication and work approach.

Anonymous

01/05/21 at 3:24AM UTC

Once you clarify the situation, if it doesn't clear up, watch out. I got bullied: gaslighted. Because I had been in the company so long and initially trusted this person, it took me over a year to get my feet back under me - I had to boost my network and gain perspective (it was happening to others too). Sad how insecure bad managers and work cultures can tear down good people. Clarify what they need, clarify what you need --- if it works out, great! If not, find where it will.

Jackie Ghedine

4.22k

Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans

01/05/21 at 12:33PM UTC

First, think of your assignments as the baseline for communication. Something comes to you over email, give yourself time to digest it, figure out all you can and then write a list of questions that would provide you with the clarity and direction you need. I would schedule a call with the person who assigned the task. Start the conversation with, I want to ensure there is no miscommunication with this task and I'm covering off on all the elements so I meet and exceed your expectations. Then ask for clarifying details on ex what they are looking for with the task and a by when date. The manager may be trying to push you to figure it out and give you the agency to do so. He may also not realize that you are still getting your feet under you with this group and need more clarification. Don't forget your colleagues can help. If they've done these tasks and understand this manager, let them help guide you through this process. As far as your confidence, it's sticky because every chink in the armor opens up your confidence gap. Confidence comes from taking action and acknowledging your accomplishments. Every single thing you do correct, (and there are so many more then you give yourself credit for) write it down. Recognizing your accomplishments — all of them — will start to rebuild your confidence one step at a time. Go back and also write down all you've done to this point. Want more on confidence? We have a free video course you can take. Copy and paste... https://www.subscribepage.com/d3h7t4?fbclid=IwAR2g2TgM-t_waxeXHRdrLkrGTv-AxCu2yZi-36X0i77UoxA0RQiROWk7tiI

Peggy Wu

Certified Life Coach & Registered Yoga Teacher

01/05/21 at 10:06PM UTC

Hi there, I can sense that the fear of not being good enough is paralyzing you. Your manager doesn't sound helpful either. It must have been stressful! To deal with ambiguity, it's necessary to ask and understand what people are expected of you if you can't figure it out on your own. Do you feel more training could be helpful? Do you have other colleagues who are more experienced to go to for guidance? You may not be the superstar today, but you can be in the near future. Give yourself time to adapt, learn, and grow. Confidence will come once you become more comfortable in your current role. You just need to get over that learning curve. Give yourself more time and don't give up. Remember that you are a leader, a fast-learner, and confident. All those qualities are still in you. The challenges are temporary, and you have what it takes to overcome them.