For as long as I could remember, I had big dreams for my future self.
From a young age, I wanted to be a lawyer.
I would daydream about being in court, eyes on me, arguing my point and winning my case.
The art of persuasion mixed with science and strategy. I had it all planned out.
Even then I was ambitious.
I was too young, too naive, too focused to see how my ambition was perceived from the outside world.
In my 20’s it was admirable. I had chutzpah.
In my 30’s it was questioning. Don’t you want kids? Aren’t you going to stop traveling so you can be with your husband? Is work the only thing you care about?
My ambition was turned against me, making me question my decisions, my desires, my striving self.
In my 40’s I own my ambition, unapologetically.
I want to move mountains.
I want to empower an entire generation.
In my 40’s I understood what ambition is and what ambition isn’t.
Ambition IS wanting more.
Ambition IS NOT choosing work over family.
Ambition IS achieving the goals I set out for myself.
Ambition IS NOT achieving the goals for myself with disregard for others.
Ambition IS climbing the ladder
Ambition IS NOT stepping on heads on the way up the ladder
What is your relationship with ambition? Can you proudly own it or does it make you cringe?
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15 Comments
15 Comments
Lesa Edwards
842
THE career expert for high achievers
01/22/21 at 2:02PM UTC
Love this shameless ownership of ambition! Here's how I see it: Ambition is our drive to achieve what we were put on this earth for. Ambition, when served properly, comes with a side dish of willingness to be afraid...and do the thing anyway.
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1 Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
01/22/21 at 8:35PM UTC
Great definition! Ambitious women are viewed negatively and we need to lean into our ambition to start changing the dialogue!
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Cynthia Jones 1128
133
01/22/21 at 2:07PM UTC
Your post is very timely. Being an ambitious female isn't always looked on in a positive light. I've struggled with the negative comments. In recent years I've started reframing my thoughts similar to you but not quite as articulate. It's helped me a lot. I'm actually reading Shellye Archambeau's book Unapologetically Ambitious currently. I'd highly recommend it for those who are struggling with being perceived ambitious in a negative manner.
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1 Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
01/22/21 at 8:37PM UTC
I read research from a professor at Columbia University who created a story about an ambitious professional, divided students in half and told the same story, one with Henry and one with Heidi. The group collectively didn't care for Heidi's ambition and found it off-putting while the other group collectively thought Henry was put together, no-nonsense and successful. CRAZY!
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Betsy Walters
182
I can learn anything.
01/22/21 at 2:14PM UTC
Thank you for this. I'm about to turn 60 and I want to change careers to a people-oriented work like a life coach. I've work as a technical writer and I'm tired of technology but especially of the corporate environment which is too often toxic.
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1 Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
01/22/21 at 8:37PM UTC
Lean into that ambitious goal and take one step every day towards achieving it!
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Anonymous
01/22/21 at 3:19PM UTC
Actually ambition for powerful careers is championed in this society. It's expected of women ever since the Cosby Show.
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1 Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
01/22/21 at 8:38PM UTC
ah, but the unconscious bias women have to deal with when they are ambitious is quite astonishing.
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1 Reply
Anonymous
01/22/21 at 8:43PM UTC
Society expects it. Nobody tells their daughters to settle for working class jobs. You worked hard to get what you have. Don't let anyone take it away.
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1 Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
01/23/21 at 12:28PM UTC
That's empowering!
1 Reply
Barb Hansen
3.34k
Ask me anything about Startups
01/22/21 at 4:04PM UTC
What a great post that's got me thinking
I grew into owning my ambition as I matured. I have always been ambitious but I wouldn't vocalize it until I was older. I would research, work hard, do interesting things, volunteer for new projects at work and was probably viewed as ambitious as others.
I wish I had been braver about speaking about my ambitions and asking for help earlier in my career, instead of waiting until I was in my mid-40s to really speak about what I wanted to do.
And this question has me thinking about why I wasn't more vocal earlier, and I don't have an answer to that question just yet.
but I can say that my take now is, if you don't like my ambitious nature that's a "you problem" not a "me problem" :)
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1 Reply
Jackie Ghedine
4.22k
Coach for Gen X Women | Jack Russell of Humans
01/22/21 at 8:39PM UTC
I'm delighted this question got you pondering and thinking. It's eye-opening how we are viewed and the double standard that exists for women. What matters now is that you OWN your ambition!
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Malissa
614
Controller in the Agricultural Industry.
01/22/21 at 6PM UTC
I have always been very unapologetic about my ambition. Great employers will embrace that.
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Reply
Margaret Mahdi
11
01/24/21 at 1:44PM UTC
When one truly love herself, she WILL accept her birthright to BOLDY be all & do all her hearts desire, having integrity & character...there is no reason to apologize when working the plan the universe has written for her. #AMBITIONISPOWER
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