Will taking the promotion mean that I have less energy to fix my marriage?
October 27,2020 at 2:47PM UTC
I'm stuck. I've been struggling to keep my marriage together, and at the same time I'm unhappy in my job. But because I've been spending so much energy on getting my personal life together, I haven't been able to dedicate myself to a job search as fully as I'd like.
Out of nowhere, the opportunity for a promotion lands in my lap. What do I do?
I should clarify--it's more than just the job I'm unhappy with--it's the employer. I've worked for this non-profit in several different roles for nearly 10 years, and I have been growing increasingly frustrated with its flaws (poor strategic planning, lack of self-awareness on the part of executive leadership, and a culture of distrust and fear, to name a few). Former colleagues who have left are constantly encouraging me to get out. I've made many attempts and gotten many offers over the years...but have decided to stay each time because I am valued here, and no other non-profit can top the salary I'm making. I've considered taking a job with a pay cut, but since I have been supporting myself and my husband since COVID hit, and he is trying to start his own business, I can't afford to do that right now.
If I turn down the promotion, I'll continue to coast in my current job while I handle my personal stuff...and continue to be unhappy with my employer. I will have more energy to devote to turning my marriage around.
If I take the promotion, I'll have a title and responsibilities that can hopefully translate to better opportunities elsewhere in the future (I would be a "Manager" instead of an "Analyst")...but the energy involved in starting a new job, let alone a job that would bring me closer to some of the organization's flaws I mentioned...I am concerned that I won't be able to spend as much time and energy on tackling the issues in my marriage. I don't know yet what the pay would be, but I am tempted to demand a salary increase that would cover the additional cost of couples' counseling.
Without going too deeply into the issues in my relationship, I'll say that we are on the brink of divorce, and believe me when I say that it truly does take almost all of my time and energy.
Help! What would you do if you were in my shoes?
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A growth opportunity weird negotiation
im working for a startup in the US from Spain, Since I live here in Spain I have to register as an autonomours worker to pay for my own taxes which are a lot.
here in Spain companies pay a 25-30% on top of gross salary that goes to taxes and allow benefits like medical coverage, maternity leave etc.
Since my company doesn’t have a presence here i registered as an autonomous and I paid ALL my taxes but I work like a full time employee, there are companies that can help handling international contracts and I presented this option to the company
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