Has anyone ever had a manager just turn on them all of a sudden?

30 Comments

1. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 2:10AM UTC

   I’m sorry to hear that and hope your situation improves. Are you meeting all expectations and a very strong performer? If not, the hostility could be coming from that. Especially if your manager is under pressure for team performance.

2. dick@beachnixon.comDecember 12,2025 at 12:25PM UTC

   Yes. It’s them, not you. Something isn’t going well for them and you are the punching bag. You’ll have to document the hostility and call it out in the moment, noting how it makes you feel unsafe and defensive, and is impacting your ability to do your job well. can ask them if they think you are stupid and if they are trying to make you quit via hostile work environment just point out that the way they act towards you makes you feel horrible. They will either be shocked and unaware or you will know immediately you need to get away fast.

3. Judy LevensonDecember 12,2025 at 1:33PM UTC

   Sorry you have to go through this. I had a manager turn on me and try to make my life so miserable that I would quit. Start looking for a new job and walk out of there with an offer and your head held high. That's the best revenge!

4. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 2:02PM UTC

   Most likely something is going on with them but I would still ask for feedback. I always feel like I rather get negative feedback early so I can fix it then wait for things to build up if there is anything at all. Some managers are not emotionally mature enough to be a manager and it affects the team because if it’s a performance issues they should be communicating that to you, not being mean and passive aggressive. If asking for feedback doesn’t work and they keep this behavior up only two things you can do realize this is not about you and ignore it and do your work or start looking for a new role but maybe do both. This usually doesn’t get better and it is part of their management style. My manager is very childish like this too and I just ignore it and do the best work because when I ask for feedback he always tells me I am doing great. I can do for now, but this is not sustainable.

5. Beth Whight MoralesDecember 12,2025 at 2:20PM UTC

   Is it possible they found a new favorite, and that person doesn’t like you?

6. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 2:33PM UTC

   I had this happen to me. I confronted the manager to try and resolve the situation and let him know I did not appreciate the way he was treating me. Eventually I went to HR about it. We had a 3 way and he changed his tune he also let me know that certain things I had been doing were really driving him crazy! That was enlightening. One of the things was that I always made myself available to anyone that needed help. My desk had become the go to place for help. This was not my actual job but I love figuring things out and training people. The CEO encouraged this as had my former boss. I also worked long hours and had a rather full plate. What I didn’t know was it messed with his ability to control the workload of the department. Oh! I did not know that. Duh. So we agreed that I would respect that and he would ensure that folks learned that mine was no longer the go to desk and I would curtail my hours immediately. (I’m salaried so it’s not like I was milking the hourly). Later on he and I became quite chummy and he admitted to me that a colleague had been bad mouthing me to him and told him some significant lies about me. He had believed her and now knew that she was working hard to undermine me. Wow. See you just never know.

7. WendyRMDecember 12,2025 at 2:36PM UTC

   Honestly, you are now seeing the true face of your manager. To be fair, they could be going through a tough year. However, that shouldn't flip their personality. Our managing partner (small company) is like that. If you are new and shiny it's all good. The minute you outshine him (i.e. get praise from a managing partner) you are screwed. I've seen him push out/make miserable/silent fire several people in marketing. He's tried with me. He's even done it to some of our brokers. He plays favorites. One of our best brokers quit because he kept giving really good leads to his buddies. I think the partners don't want to see it because he's been here so long and they are effectively hands off. Best advice I can give is this: become indispensable to his higher ups, get everything in writing (keep a physical folder if you must) to cya. Then still be your stellar self. Do the best you can. If you don't get answers over email, then go and physically ask. I found that works best with my mp. Go home on time. Take care of yourself and look for fulfillment outside of work. Build yourself up. This type of manager never will.

8. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 2:48PM UTC

   This happened to me. I suddenly went from hero to zero after three years. Out of nowhere. I was accused of “faking it since I was hired”. I was eventually “performance managed out” and given severance to go quietly and keep my mouth shut. My position was later filled in another state. A valued member of the team one minute to being tossed a side like garbage the next. I’ve been in places where I know it’s horrible from day one. It hits different when it goes well for a while, but I keep reminding myself that it was never really real, and it was all an illusion.Normal people don’t go around destroying others.

9. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 3:43PM UTC

   Ugh! I'm so sorry for what you are going through! I went through something similar and it was such a let down! The company I worked for was reorganizing. I was given the option of staying in my original position or moving into an "events coordinator" role. The person who would be my "new" manager in the events ccoordinator role literally "wined and dined" me for a month, acting like my best friend, treating me as a "partner" as opposed to her "employee", inviting me to higher up company functions, bragging about me, etc. I finally agreed to accept the role and within a month I regretted it! She consistently spoke down to me, told me I was responsible for running her personal errands (while on the clock) even though she knew I did not own a car and carpooled to work, put me in charge of 2 other departments under her that I was not qualified for, etc. Literally overnight I went from being her "prized employee" she was showing off while trying to get me to accept the position, to her "punching bag". I ended up in therapy and after a year of being constantly belittled, demeaned and publicly humiliated I up and walked out one day.

   Please don't let your situation get to the point where you are so miserable your mental health starts to suffer! It may be time to face the fact that the job you once loved has transitioned and may no longer be a good fit.

10. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 4:42PM UTC

    Most definately. I have been at a large company for years, one team would change Directors every couple of years, and one (after multiple stellar reviews by this same person) found every reason to cut me up,down and sideways. Telling me I missed a call from a key customer and I should always take the call (I was in the hospital, almost dying the night before and there was no way I would know I would be out) and then they were an international trip and came back and yelled - if you see a charge on the card for XXX tell me - it is medical I will pay. They got sick and then left for another job after that. I was able to regain my stellar reports/reviews BUT had to call in ADA,HR etc. for my illness and why I missed this one call. It sucks.....but you see who you can trust and who you can not.

11. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 5:39PM UTC

    Have you pulled them aside privately and had a direct conversation about things? I would strongly suggest this but in a way that seems to support them in case they are dealing with something you may not be aware of. Try this, book a 15 minute chat. Sit them down and say I noticed that something has shifted in the way we work together and I wonder if there is something I had done to make this happen? If so please give me direct feedback as to how to go back to the way we used to effectively work together. Is there something I can do to make our relationship better? Do you need me to do something different to support you?

    This makes it more about them but also gives them the ability to be direct with you (be prepared to hear what you may not want to hear) but is also non-confrontational and does not call out anything specific. If they ask for a specific reason why you are having this chat you can share one incident that made you have the conversation. Good luck, this is definitely fixable.

12. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 7:40PM UTC

    Yes. Did you have an issue with one of your managers peers or anything?

    I had just been promoted, great review, big raise. I pushed back when a controlling executive tried to run something in my area. Shes was not on our team. After that I suddenly was a problem. People had issues with me that I had not even interacted with. He also went from warm to guarded. I wish I picked up on the signals and found something else. I thought it would blow over. The truth is once they decide you are not longer needed your days are numbered

    New roles will become available in January so even applying and interviewing might help give you hope.

13. AnonymousDecember 12,2025 at 10:44PM UTC

    This happened to me 5 years ago. I was with a company for 20 years. It was a small company so it was me, another girl (family member) and the Vice President & Pres. I basically ran the inside and the VP ran the outside. Well he had a known reputation of getting in these "moods" and ignore employees. For my job, he couldn't ignore me because the other girl didn't know what I did about projects, finances, etc. Anyway, he would call and have her relay messages to me. He would also give her my work. I finally had enough. I had a conversation with the Pres. and he told me he would fix it. It never did get fixed just worse. I confronted him again and said I thought you fixed it. I had a mental breakdown because I just couldn't take the demeaning behavior for absolutely no reason. I took FMLA and they replaced me with the VP's friend who had no experience and used Dummy books to learn everything. I figured out that he was trying to get rid of me for a while because he wanted to bring the girl to replace me. I was able to sue for wrongful termination. It ruined me for a couple years. The VP was evil and we were all just his puppets. He was fake and insecure. My family member still works there. Needless to say, we don't speak because she didn't want to testify to the treatment I received and did not want to have any communication with me until after the case was settled.

14. KMCDecember 13,2025 at 2:47PM UTC

    This is awful. So sorry you experienced this.

15. AnonymousDecember 13,2025 at 3:45AM UTC

    This is them personally and doesn't sound like it has anything to do with you.

    Understanding your truth and having or developing health boundaries is key and a good lesson for you. Don't give another person power to turn your world upside down. Find your happiness and satisfaction in you and your efforts. Keep your emotional distance from this person.

16. Nichole SimsDecember 13,2025 at 2:07PM UTC

    I had a manager 30 years ago, who did not like me and to this day I still have no idea why. (I have my suspicions, but none of them proven.)

    As a former professor, and now as a career strategist, I researched bullies in the workplace so I could help my students and clients. Unfortunately, you will never know why they dislike you.

    Don’t hurt your brain trying to figure it out. The best you can do is DO the best you can do. And, sometimes it means staying on the job, as I originally did, but other times it means that you need to leave for your own mental health.

    While I stayed the first time, I encountered a bully decades later. When I found myself in that position again I decided to resign for my own self preservation. But, it gave me the opportunity to start my own business.

    You might check out a guy by the name of Andy Regal who speaks about bullies in his book and in a weekly email.

17. AnonymousDecember 13,2025 at 2:34PM UTC

    Yes, this happened to me about 3 years ago and I ended up leaving a job I loved because mentally, I was done. I even went to her manager about it, and she was pretty much useless. She took too long to address it and I couldn't stay any longer. Ended up getting a promotion elsewhere but my confidence was shattered. I mostly over it but the effects of bullying are long lasting, which is something people don't realise

18. AnonymousDecember 13,2025 at 2:53PM UTC

    If they randomly turned on you out of the blue, its been my experience it happens for 1 of 3 reasons:

    1. They have personal issues they're dealing with.

    2. They are trying to force u to quit (dont want to pay severance/unemployment)

    3. A decision has already been made for u to b removed and this is their way of dealing with it.

    I would request a mtg to inquire if theres anything you have done wrong or need to address to get a better idea of which.

19. Deb BeuryDecember 13,2025 at 4:10PM UTC

    Oh you are living my life ! I thought I had finally found my "home". Thought I found a good manager, very nice when hiring me and the first two months. Much to my surprise he did a 180 on me and if he was paying attenton, he would have seen in my eyes this was not acceptable and I knew I would be leaving. I went through six toxic environments and my nerves were shot. Much luck to you going forward!!

20. Terry CostelloDecember 13,2025 at 5:40PM UTC

    Absolutely. I’ve had a Supervisor who I called Jekel and Hyde Everyday I wouldn’t know who would be coming. I would say, wait five minutes and you will see a complete different person.

21. Edna ThackerayDecember 13,2025 at 8:15PM UTC

    Do not take your manager personally ever...some people let their frustrations get the best of them

22. AnonymousDecember 13,2025 at 9:30PM UTC

    I am so sorry you are going through this. It is so damaging! You are not alone. My experience was similar: after I submitted my resignation to a strange, passive-aggressive manager who turned on me exactly like your situation, he apologized profusely and convinced me to stay. A few weeks later, the behavior not only returned but worsened, and I ended up leaving after three VERY long months (4 months after my initial resignation). I found out that he was later fired due to significant mental health challenges and incompetence. Is there anyone in the company that you can confide in who may be experiencing a similar issue with this manager? It might also be helpful to report this issue so it is documented, but it depends on your company/HR's tolerance. If more than one person is experiencing this, the company will ensure this behavior is addressed.

23. Chantel CummingsDecember 13,2025 at 9:56PM UTC

    Yes, that happened to me a couple of years ago. I ran out of gas on my way to a meeting, and after that I couldn't do anything right. I'm still baffled why she acted like it was the worst thing that could ever happen. She fired me a couple of months later while I was working remotely while my dad was dying. Her reasoning was that I was insubordinate for not being in the office at least three days a week.

24. AnonymousDecember 14,2025 at 1:08AM UTC

    Yes, and eventually they find a way to fire you. Run.

25. AnonymousDecember 14,2025 at 3:51AM UTC

    Yep - they're threatened, they want someone else to have your job, they need to make budget cuts, or they have some perceived slight because of something you did (allegedly) or something that happened. Head down, do your job, and start/keep looking for something else. It's not so bad when you see it coming - and clearly you do.

26. Antoinette HolmesDecember 14,2025 at 4:57AM UTC

    Yup! One minute everything is fine the next, I’m fired afywr 10.5 yrs.

    He was only my boss for a year.

27. Joyce Glas NielsenDecember 14,2025 at 4:03PM UTC

    I worked for a narcissist, who felt very threatened by my experience and competence. I was older than her, as well. She constantly looked for ways to trip me up, because she would fire people at the drop of a hat. Of course, I never gave her reason, which I think frustrated her more. When the company was bought by a competitor, she even told the competitor that I held a lesser role in the company than I truly did. As a result, I was one of the casualties in the RIFs that followed the acquisition. Unfortunately, her negativity lived rent-free in my brain for several years after. Run if you can.

28. Jos WallerDecember 14,2025 at 7:52PM UTC

    Yes, I had a manager who did this as well. She was a systematic bully, she picked favorites as well as those who she could harass. Had a lot of personal problems and she then brought her anger and sense of entitlement into the workplace. The cold comfort I had was I saw her chase out one employee so when she turned on me I knew it wasn't my fault. The best thing I can say to you is it's not yours either! Please get in touch with an EAP program if available or some type of counseling to try to work through this.

    Document your experiences and reach out to those you trust. I was only able to get though that awful time because of this.

    In my experience, my manager tried to have me constructively dismissed, but her management caught on and I was moved to a different department, luckily. Know that it may come to that so if you can either take a medical leave or start a job search to get out of this. Like I said, I was lucky to get a transfer since I worked at a large university, but it was a horrible experience that I'm still coming to terms with 20 years later.

29. AnonymousDecember 16,2025 at 2:54AM UTC

    I'm so sorry this is happening to you. This can be difficult to navigate. I've had this happen to me, but I wound up leaving. At one job, my manager was very much on my side and quite supportive and I'd even considered her a mentor. She left for medical reasons and returned to work. I'd kept everything going and maintained relationships with other departments and made strides in her absence. Big mistake. After returning, she heard about the progress that happened in her absence and it was rough from that point on. There was not much point in going above her as most management was scared of her wild mood swings. I documented and moved on. It's taken a long time for me to get past this. I recommend documenting, approach your manager in a non confrontational (helpful) way to see if there's anything different you can do to help and support. I'd be looking for another position; once a manager has it in for you, your days at that position are numbered. Leave on your own terms.

30. AnonymousDecember 18,2025 at 1:11AM UTC

    Something similar happened to me and I moved elsewhere in the organization. The manager lost their cool in the most unprofessional way: yelling at me and insulting me. She mentioned in conversations with colleagues that she takes some sort of supplements. I think this and other medications are affecting her mind. I say nothing at work and watch if she is doing this to others.