DISCUSSIONS

A while ago I had a small issue with a young fellow employee who made a comment about older employees not being able to use the computer as well as younger employees.

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Anonymous

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A while ago I had a small issue with a young fellow employee who made a comment about older employees not being able to use the computer as well as younger employees. She caught herself and said “oops, I should not have said that” and I loudly agreed with her. She is one of those people who normally consider herself as woke, and falls under the LGBTQ umbrella so I assume she would be more sensitive to other’s in other categories such as senior employees, but I guess I was wrong. My current position has me giving advice to other staff members in an area I was trained to specialize in. I am not looking for thanks, but in all cases except her, when I help I have gotten a thank you for my review that they requested me to write up for them. Not only did this women not acknowledge that she received my work, but she never said a simple thank you. Now she is leaving for greener pastures. Should I say something to her, or should I just let it go?

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  1. Anonymous

    First of all she’s a twit. Sorry but I’m in my late 50’s and I would take offense to her nasty statement, as I’m very well versed in computers and technology. Secondly, she’s leaving. Good riddance. She will continually make mistakes and will in her future. But guess what she’s either in your past or will be soon, so let it go. Oh she’s not woke she’s ignorant and rude. Not your job to wake her up, let her be someone else’s problem.

  2. Anonymous

    No need to drive your point home. They never thanked you in the first place because your help, opinions and advice hold no value for her. Why would you think doubling down on past advise would be well received?

  3. Anonymous

    Just let it go—goodbye and good riddance. I am 68 years young, and my first career was in IT. I can type circles around some 20—and 30-somethings who think they have tech all figured out. After age 50, I completed two online degrees (one master's and one doctorate).

  4. Anonymous

    It sounds like you’re looking for board support to get a good “I told you so!” In before this woman leaves. Rise above this and let it go. You know full and well she won’t be receptive to this constructive feedback. Stop fighting this fight. It’s unbecoming.

  5. Anonymous

    Be like Elsa. Let it go.

  6. Lori Laurito Betz

    I was going to say exactly this!

  7. Anonymous

    Just let it go , not worth the aggravation and time , hopefully along the way she will learn some life lessons about manners and politeness but if not it’s her bumpy road , move on a don’t think about it again not worth your time

  8. Kim Raper

    Let it go.. its never going to work out the way you would like sadly.

  9. Anonymous

    Using WOKE and LGBTQ umbrella seems a bit negative…maybe the issue is you?

  10. Lisa OGrady

    Let it go and move on. Especially since she’s leaving.

    I’m older and wouldn’t have been offended by her remark, personally but that’s just me.

  11. Wanda Shaw

    Yes.

  12. Anonymous

    It depends, if you think she is a sponge and will take the feedback in a positive way and you deliver it as a coaching item then yes do so and compliment her on the time you worked together and wish her the best in her new role. You will be better for it and perhaps she will get it...You never know if your paths cross again, it may be good for you both. Don't expect a thank you but think of it as a course correction for her.

  13. Anonymous

    “I am not looking for a thanks” …but also…”Should I tell a departing employee that I’m offended that she didn’t thank me?” “Also, she’s queer, not sure if that’s the problem”.

    Yikes, lady.

  14. Anonymous

    I think the OP meant that since this person was apart of the LGBTQ community they should have been more thoughtful and sensitive before making a blanket statement like this.

  15. Alexis Gladstone

    I would let it go. There is no upside to this, especially since you don't appear to have a relationship of mutual trust and respect.

  16. Me!

    Leave it as is. She did acknowledge the mistake. That is as far as this needs to go. We all need to be aware of bias however, we all have them. Use this experience and how it made you feel to explore areas you might improve and could be more aware.

  17. Anonymous

    Why waste your breath? It’s good that you’re sensitive.

  18. Ximena Castillo

    Best to leave it be. Though I'm not sure how to interpret your use of the term, WOKE, and saying one who is a member of the LGBT+ community should be more sensitive, is a reach. People are people.

    Also, in reading these comments I noticed that people are reading this as "she said all old people are worse with computers than young people," which isn't what she said. She said the older employees at that job were worse than the younger employees. Was her delivery tactless, yes. But....was it true? Are you miffed because there was some truth to the statement?

    I do marketing at an engineering firm and am always frustrated to be working with some of the most brilliant minds, people who build buildings for hecks sake...but I'm being called upon to help them pdf a word document -_-. I took it as an opportunity to hold a session for some of them on basic Adobe/Microsoft controls. Some of them even asked me to help them get better at Excel! So, in conclusion. Let the girlie go. But if she was right, maybe take it as an opportunity to strengthen the workforce that IS there.

  19. Anonymous

    You made a lot of judgements in this post. I think the opportunity is to look inward and not place so many labels on people. Let her be, people work differently together and unless she is harming you (which a lack of thanks is not unless you are taking it personal then that is your issue not hers). She made the comment about the computer, and then apologized recognizing her bias, good for her, that shows awareness.

  20. Anonymous

    My initial reaction would be to let it go. This person sounds like a bully and thank goodness you won't have to deal with them any longer. But after reading the replies to your post I see victim blaming and excusing a bully is acceptable when the victim is an older person. The lack of awareness of personal bias in these responses is alarming.

  21. Q

    Her assumptions about people who are members of the older age bracket and technology is an unfair generalization, much like the assumption that a person being a member of a minority group will automatically mean they are self-aware and sensitive to others outside their direct group. Assumptions generally don't lead to anything good for all parties involved.

    She's leaving the organization. There's no need to pursue it further.

  22. Kirsten DiCarlo

    Let it go

  23. Anonymous

    Let her go.

  24. Wanda Shaw

    Let it go and let her go on to those "greener pastures".

  25. Anonymous

    Me I would say something like "You will find other coat tails you can ride on for employment success"

  26. Rebecca Van Hout

    Just let it go. Be the bigger person.

  27. Yvette Shields Wilson

    Let it go. Life will teach her what she failed to learn otherwise.

  28. Anonymous

    But my comment to the coat tail rider on her way out the door will embarrass her to make her regret mis treating Anonymous.

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