Is this my responsibility or not?

9 Comments

1. AnonymousOctober 16,2024 at 7:37PM UTC

   I keep going back to your opening sentence that you're the LEADER of a large team and project. So IMO, it's your responsibility to help course correct an employee that's not on track. Your manager approached you, he's asking for clarification on event expectations and you provided that.

   Instead of getting annoyed by this and splitting hairs on who's responsibility it is to clear up calendar misunderstandings, follow up over email confirming the calendar protocol and include the close colleague that schedules everything so accountability can be spread around the team.

   If you have other issue with this employee, show some leadership by sitting them down and attaching consequences to behaviors.

2. AnonymousOctober 16,2024 at 7:55PM UTC

   The poster below answered it remarkably! As the leader, it is your role to correct behavior, whether he is entitled or not. I definitely understand exactly where you're coming from. He is using an excuse not to work. I agree, have a sit down 1:1 and let them know, the email/invite protocol and what it means. It is not only expected but required to attend and assist or just to be aware as you mentioned the way your protocol works. Curious, does this person perform otherwise or do you have on going issues with them? If they are a high level manager, are they under your direction? If so, definitely teach them you are the boss and remind them of the hierarchy there and reiterate your expectations. If still a problem, meet with your HR Director for guidance and perhaps a 3-way meeting if needed. He's getting away with his behavior because you are allowing it. I work in this and the entitlement is because it's allowed. Sounds like this person needs what we call in the south "a come to jesus" moment.

3. AnonymousOctober 16,2024 at 8:46PM UTC

   I question the "high level manager" description but ok. He is not engaged and is covering. No big deal. I would definitely not spend any time or effort in your correction of the behavior. An email stating he is expected to attend when invited. If he was engaged and wanted to handle these invites differently he would not pretend he's shocked. He knows how to game the system. He's entitled and acting as such. Chances are very good he treats all sorts of things in life just like this. Not your monkey, not your circus.

4. Maria MolinariOctober 16,2024 at 9:15PM UTC

   I totally get it! It’s frustrating when expectations aren’t followed.

   My answer depends on the impact to the project that this outreach has. If this outreach has any impact on the project AT ALL, yes it is most definitely on the project lead to not only ensure the needed attendance but also the understanding of the process and to set clear expectations. If this outreach has no impact on the project than no, guidance is enough.

5. RosemaryOctober 16,2024 at 10:09PM UTC

   What type of event is it? Are we talking a run of the mill thing during regular work hours?

   What does the meeting description area say?

   I can see being annoyed if it feels like this manager is asking for custom hand holding, but may be worth adding explicit language somewhere re who is required to attend. That way when the ‘I didn’t know!’ protests come up you can say, …’That information was in the email, Bob.’

6. Teresa CookOctober 17,2024 at 1:37PM UTC

   Leaders are to lead by example and since your boss is in a higher position it is not your resposibility to keep him up to date. Since he has that role, he should already be aware of what his job requirements are. It is not your responsibility it’s his.

7. Alina FloreaOctober 17,2024 at 5:37PM UTC

   YES, irrespective of your coordination/management position, it is YOUR responsibility as a leader to make sure the message is received AND understood by all recipients, especially in the case where you are aware there are - in your perception - hick-ups in the relationship. This goes even if the other person is your manager. Beware your manager operates at a more strategic level, meaning that he may not concentrate on all the more detailed matters but on a higher level topics, unless he is made aware in a more straightforward manner than a “to” email. As an aspect of appropriate managing-up, one needs to discuss directly those actions where they expect the involvement of their manager, as well as to take all actions in order to learn from their manager the personal preferences in communication, as well as sharing with the manager their own preferences and agreeing over a modus operandi. It is only this way you demonstrate your intention is to have matters communicated, received and understood, you show proactivity, you build relationship with your manager and you prove professionalism for not leaving grey areas that may become “nobody’s land” in terms of responsibility.

8. AnonymousOctober 20,2024 at 3:43PM UTC

   It sounds like the “to” and “cc” protocol is not widely known beyond your team, if you had to explain it. Going forward, I’d get very explicit about who is needed and who is optional, to CYA if nothing else. Also, does this person have an assistant? If so, they should be the ones asking whether or not this person is necessary for a meeting.

9. AnonymousOctober 20,2024 at 4:35PM UTC

   I would put together a guide for comms so that there is no confusion going forward. This doesn't have to be a big thing. As for why he did not know perhaps he is not as detailed as you. Since you are the project manager why not be bigger than this small problem and take control! Then your leadership will be noticed and going forward there will be no conflicts. I would also add to that guide how to notify and who to notify if/when you cannot go if you are a "to". Have a meeting to share this or do a video guide as well as the written email about this. Then if someone doesn't get it they get directly blamed for lack of knowledge. Level does not matter, everyone needs the information.