Struggling with a new manager.

Anonymous

April 19,2022 at 4:06PM UTC

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Struggling with a new manager.

Bear with me - this is a long one.

I was promoted a few months ago to a brand new, created-for-me position. I now report to two managers, with the role being split 50/50 between the two teams (both teams report in to my ultimate boss, so they are related, but the work is very different).

The first 50% is great. My manager and I get along well, and they always have some solid projects for me to work on, and is continually adding more to my plate. I also was just told last week that THEIR role is expanding, as someone on my former manager's team is moving elsewhere in the company, and my current manager is taking over their duties (it makes sense, as the role they're taking over was also a created-for-person role, and the duties fit with us). This means I'll get even more projects to work on, which is exciting and great news for me!

However, I'm struggling with Manager 2. When I first took the role, I was told that it would be mostly admin work for their team - updating contact lists, creating the monthly newsletter, that sort of thing, and, as it's a publicity team, I would be a backup person for tours. This is all great - admin work is my super power, and, while I wasn't in love with the idea that I would be doing publicist work, I figured that I couldn't knock it until I've tried it. It's been....mostly fine. They have a very small team, and they're mostly welcoming.

Both Managers and I had a check in about the role a few weeks ago - it was generally good, but Manager 2 stressed that this was supposed to be a "50/50 role!!" several times.

At my next regular weekly check in with Manager 2, I asked if there was anything they'd like to add to my list. They said yes, they had another project for me, and when I said "great, let's talk about it!", they immediately said, "not this week." Why? I don't know. They also decided that it was time for me to start shadowing publicity tours (which I do need to do, and I agreed!), and scheduled me to hop on one when I returned from a few days off. I mentioned that the day they wanted me to shadow was my first day back after a few days off (hello, inbox!), and was also a day where I am the zoom host for a recurring, company-wide meeting, which they know, as I've been handling that since before I moved into this role. I started to say "but let me get with Manager #1, and see if they or Other Person can host," Manager 2 cut me off mid-sentence and told me that I really just needed to start doing the tours, because time was running out, and Other Person on Team was taking a sabbatical in June, and I'd need to help cover them. I was a bit taken aback by her harshness, to be honest.

I did connect with Manager 1 and worked out the zoom situation, and shadowed this tour virtually for around 30 minutes total. The person I was shadowing had some technical issues, and we just kind of hopped on and off MS Teams while they worked it out. I did get to listen in a little bit, and we talked a little about how they connect people to radio interviews, etc. It was a good session, and though I am still not totally enthused about the work, I am looking forward to learning more.

At our most recent weekly check in, Manager 2 was again annoyed that I only had a couple of things on my list from their side of the job, so I pointedly asked, "what would you like to add to my list?" Once again, they said "Nothing." She was then upset that one of the other team members had left for a single day off without giving me a contact list to work on updating (despite this work supposedly being a "when you have downtime" thing to do), and then asked about the tour I had shadowed, and if I felt ready to just do one. I was a bit taken aback by that statement as well, given what I mentioned above, but managed to respond with: "I'd like to shadow a couple more before you let me loose on these poor people, haha, - I really was only on for about 30 minutes, and most of that time was eaten up with international calling issues, so I only got the gist. I'd really like to listen in on a couple more to get confident, as well as be included on some email communications with the people we're representing so I can learn about that, too." Manager 2 actually rolled their eyes at me.

I have also found that they do not really listen when I speak - an example of this is, they'll say something like "The splash pages you created don't really take any time to maintain," I'll respond with, "well, it depends on what I have to do that week - if I'm just deleting completed tours, no, it takes maybe an hour, but adding things takes a lot longer, it's because Splash makes us do things, like changing fonts or moving things around, manually." They just responded with "so...no time." I mean, I spent 4 hours a few weeks ago adding many confirmed tour dates manually, but no. No time at all.

I also mentioned that I'd like to talk about the June tour schedule, as June is a CRAZY month for me. I'm dealing with the logistics for TON of company meetings (yes, including hosting the zooms and recording them), as well as wrapping up a separate project that I am the point person for, in addition to covering these publicity tours - and the tours they want me to cover fall on days with multiples of these meetings. I wanted to talk it over to see if I could trade with someone - like, one of the folks can take the tours that I'd be covering for the person on sabbatical, as three of the four that I'd be covering fall on these meeting days, and I could take some of the tours that don't fall on these dates, in order for me to even out my June plate a little (and I hate to ask Manager 1 to do the logistics thing, as they actually have to pay attention to the content of these meetings, not whether or not they hit the record button). I don't want to avoid doing the work, but I am really trying to proactively balance all the things coming at me in June. Manager 2's response was to roll their eyes again, and say "Ugh, I'll talk to Manager 1 about the June schedule."

In our check in a few weeks ago, Managers 1 and 2 had asked me to create a calendar for the year, mapping out all of these company meetings and the other seasonal projects I'm working on, for the exact reason of June, and so far, Manager 2 has completely ignored it. I'm so frustrated! I'm thinking of going to Manager 1, but I feel like it would just be me complaining.

Thoughts? I know this is a lot, but I'm getting to the end of my rope.....

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AnonymousApril 19,2022 at 4:40PM UTC
Hey there!
Have you thought about taking the first 50% position fully?
Seems you really have a lot on your plate right now, and the fact that the teams and the management are so different makes it even harder.
AnonymousApril 19,2022 at 6:29PM UTC
OP here.
Oh, yes, I have. I really have.
I'm going to at least warn Manager 1 in our weekly check in today that Manager 2 is NOT happy. She seems to resent having to share me as a resource, and with the changes that will be coming down the pike, it might make sense to get someone for her full time (she can definitely use it, for sure!)
I just worry that it's going to come off as complaining, but I think I have to do it.
Rynn StrangeApril 21,2022 at 12:44PM UTC
And there is the real problem - Manager 2 wants you all to herself. She has a lot to trouble speaking up about that, and if you were to go to her team full time, I imagine the situation would get worse, or not change from what it is now. While you have support from one manager, you need it from both, and if she is unwilling to work with Manager 1 on your work load, she is clearly not a team player. It's time to stop thinking about working with Manager 1 full time and meet with her and her boss to explore the possibility after you've mapped out what your job with her is as compared to Manager 2. Go into the conversation with a written plan and be prepared to talk about the advantages to that manager and her team if you were her full time employee (not just the advantages for you).
NicoleApril 21,2022 at 12:49PM UTC
OP, I suggest you do EVERYTHING in your power to move to manager 1 full time. There's a famous quote "no one can serve two masters". And it's right, I was in your shoes years back, except to make it worse I had 4 bosses. So unless the two managers are going to really check in with one another AND be fully transparent, you are the one who will always be caught in the middle and receive any consequences alone.
Additionally, it seems like manager 2 is a toxic leader. This person is not being transparent and specifically holding information from you. When you are estimating the time it takes to complete tasks and vocalizing how long it has taken in the past and even identifying challenges, this manager is dismissing and insulting you. Also, the comments from this person about being pissed that someone didn't make a list they were supposed to before pto, is another sign. It is ENTIRELY unprofessional for someone in leadership to bad mouth a subordinate to another subordinate.
CYA by getting away from this person as quickly as possible. It's clear they don't accept any blame, experience no empathy and don't treat people like humans.
Hoping you can get out! - friendInKind
AnonymousApril 19,2022 at 7:29PM UTC
All minutia aside, document what you work on for which team weekly. Always end your recap with an offer to make adjustments to next week's schedule.
Manager 2 is frustrated and wants you to take the fall for her not managing resources.
Don't fall for the game. Documentation , tracking and cooperation should be the name of the game for you. Focusing on the he said, she said will set you up to lose.
AnonymousApril 20,2022 at 2:36PM UTC
OP here!
I do document my work in a weekly email, something I started after the check in on the role with both managers - and it's very easy to see that the work balance is in favor of Manager 1, as they are actually giving me work to do. In that weekly note, I am sure to also mark what things are "N/A" if I don't have to do work on a particular thing, so they can see that it's a category that is a part of my job, regardless of whether I put time in, if that makes sense.
I am continually asking Manager 2 for things to do (at least a couple of times per week), and I made the decision to bring it up with Manager 1 yesterday - a: because M2 might be coming in a little hot about June, and b: my sense is that the situation is only going to get worse, as I've come to the conclusion that Manager 2 just dislikes the fact that they have to share me as a resource, and that they really want someone to join their team full time (which they do need, and would probably be better), and I wanted to have it on record with M1 and their boss that I've been proactive about the situation. M1 was very supportive.
AnonymousApril 20,2022 at 3:06PM UTC
Managing up us all you can do.
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 1:58PM UTC
I’m confused about why OP says with certainty that manager 2’s team needs a full time person but yet doesn’t know what tasks needs to be handled and has to ask. Are they simply tasks you’re hoping to avoid? I agree with the suggestions to manage upwards by presenting what you think needs to be done and timeframes.
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 7:05PM UTC
I think the OP is wrapped up in the emotions and fears upsetting manager 2.
I think taking a step back and managing up will relieve her anxiety and give her position plenty of context.
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 9:00PM UTC
I think you should answer directly to OP.
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 6:34PM UTC
Hi, OP here.
Of course I'm not entirely certain that they NEED a full time person, but after attempting to have several conversations about my work load with M2, the contextual clues indicate that they WANT someone totally dedicated to them. Frankly, the annoyed reactions when I ask about deadlines/urgency of tasks (which I ask of everyone who has ever given me a work task, no matter what role I'm in), or when I say that I'd like to proactively talk about June's schedule in order to manage priorities, because everything that month is a priority, indicate to me that they would rather not share me as a resource.
I know that the work load of this three person team is growing, and they want a fourth to help mitigate that. However, as I've had zero previous interactions with this team before joining it, I *don't* know what tasks need to be handled or what M2's full vision for this team is. I have tried to facilitate conversations about how I can grow into the role (to try to get a glimpse at what M2 is setting me up to take on), I've asked M2 directly to give me things, and I've even tried asking Manager 1 to tell Manager 2 that M1 doesn't have a lot of things for me, and that M2 is free to add more. This has resulted in where I am right now. There have, however, been lots of comments about there "being so much to do" and when Other Person goes out for their sabbatical, "that really cuts our team by 1/3, so we really need you" - which then leads to, "Great, so what can I take on?" which then leads to "Ugh, I don't know." You see the dilemma.
And, to your question, I am also 100% sure that I'm not going to want to do/want to avoid some of these tasks that M2 has in mind - I did say above that I'm not enthused about publicity work. I will happily take them on, though, because it's part of the job, and, truly, because I've got to learn somehow, so I won't grumble about it (except to myself, of course, LOL)
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 8:59PM UTC
Why would her manager not have the responsibility of telling her what needs to be done? That is part of the manager’s job? Manager is not doing their job if the employee has to say “ok, now what would you like me to do….” Totally annoying.
Balanced725563April 21,2022 at 12:44PM UTC
Create a simple desk audit 15 minute intervals designating 1 or 2 project, with a one or two word description of the project. Total it daily in percentages with a total for the week. To make it even simpler, have a column on the side with a title of the project and if it’s 1 or 2. Present the data at your meetings. It’s not your problem how they manage resources.
Ladyboss501027April 21,2022 at 12:46PM UTC
managers are different and some aren’t great at assigning tasks. Some may expect you to understand the job and schedule. Id change your tone. Instead of “what else should I do” be specific. Proactively ask to shadow those calls and tel manager 2 that you know that’s part of the job so you’re just making sure it’s cool. State frankly that manager 2 has priority due to the uneven split should they need anything. In other words - stop asking the managers to manage your time. Do it
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 12:58PM UTC
In my experience,50/50 splits never work. Making the calendar for the year is great as well as the documenting. Document everything! Make it part of your day to day routine.
Part of the issue could be the relationship you've built with M1 as well as M2 being resentful to split you. If you've been doing this role about 6 months, it might be good to do a self-evaluation on how you think things are going and share with both Managers. Maybe one of your weekly check ins could be a bit longer and you can all speak on how things are progressing so far. Sometimes, companies try the 50/50 in order to determine if a full time role is really needed - M2 is not actually doing herself any favors right now by not giving you work. The more she delegates to you, the more she is able to justify how badly she needs a fully dedicated team member.
It's great hear you have a good relationship with M1 to able to speak freely with them about how you're doing! They might be able to help with the communications to M2.
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 1:37PM UTC
I’m in a 50/50 split right now. But in reality, it’s more like 80/20. Luckily the second boss isn’t giving me much shit about it right now, but these things often end up lopsided.
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 2:22PM UTC
I am sorry you are dealing with this. In a nutshell, it doesn’t work. The aftermath on your health plus the related medical expenses are not worth it. I am still recovering!
Like you, I also had a 50/50 made for me role but with Manager 1 & Manager 1.5 for the first role and Manager 2 for the second role in a different department. None of them even worked in the same location.
Teams 1 & 2 we’re like parallel lines -they never crossed paths. None of the managers were game for having a joint calendar or task list for me. Neither Managers 1 nor 1.5 frankly cared I was doing more work than a full-time equivalent-to-me peer on their team. In fact, they would assign me tasks this person didn’t want, which was often, and consistently refused to re-assign anything if I asked for help. They have even guilt tripped me for being a poor team player and the audacity to remind me on a daily basis I was working a 50/50 role and they were here to help - just like Manager 2 in your (OP’s) case.
For you own health, I would request a full time transfer to Manager 1. If you are able to financially, perhaps even working P/T for Manager I until you can be hired F/T with your expansion of duties. I tried offering that and every combination I could think of so that I would only work for one team, but Managers 1 & 1.5 refused and then I was let go completely.
I have 100s of pages of CYA documentation but guess who HR sided with at the end? Was my peer a higher performer? Were my requests for some joint meeting/task list or change in role approved? Is it fair or moral? And did it matter that I went up the chain? No, no, no, and no.
Very shortly after I left, they put out a posting for a F/T position for the exact same role I had for Team 1 - just as I had suggested earlier. I applied and heard crickets. My work for Team 2 was redistributed to 6-9 other people.
As a still recovering former 50/50 employee, I would suggest changing the situation as quickly as possible. After all, the job market is the best it has been for employees. Wishing you all the best and do keep us posted on what happens!
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 4:51PM UTC
As other people have stated, it sounds like Manager 2 is seeing the lopsidedness and is resentful of it (and probably your close relationship with Manager 1). I suspect they either doesn't know what to do about it or thinks it's your responsibility to take the initiative and find projects to do for their team.
Have you tried contacting other people in the publicity team that Manager 2 manages and working with them directly? Asking for things you can help with or things to shadow on that you think are within the scope of your position.
If you try that/have tried that, and it doesn't/didn't work either, you might consider trying to setup a meeting with Manager 1, 2, and the ultimate boss to realign on your roll. Since it's a customized roll, it makes sense that realignment might need to happen occasionally.
If you do this, request that each manager bring with them what they expect you to be working on for them, and you bring with you what you are actually working on. Having ultimate boss there might help Manager 2 feel less like it's 2 against 1 (or not). It also might show ultimate boss that hey this position is really an 80/20 roll or 90/10 and Manager 2 needs more resources on their team.
Good luck! Hopefully you can figure out something that works :)
LL CApril 22,2022 at 8:52PM UTC
Be careful of this though. Mgr 2 might resent bringing the big boss into a meeting. Mgr 2 sounds like she gets threatened easily.
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 9:54PM UTC
True. It is really dependent on Manager 2's relationship with big boss. If they have a good relationship, it could be seen as having someone in their corner, but if they don't they won't like it.
If the situation keeps getting worse though and everything else has been tried, bringing in big boss first is usually better than getting HR involved.
Bradford McCormickApril 21,2022 at 5:23PM UTC
None of my business and this may no apply to you. I was a computer programmer. I took a job that was 50% in each of two teams. That ended up meaning more like 100% times 2. And the mental interference of having to focus very intently on two conflicting tasks. I hope you have a better experience with 50% + 50%
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 6:41PM UTC
Hello! OP here.
I have done a 50/50 split before (or even 25/25/25/25), but it was always with a team that was interconnected, so the tasks and projects for one where often the tasks and projects for all, if that makes sense.
Manager 1 and Manager 2 report to the same Big Manager, but their departments are very different, so I think this is where much of the problem lies....
AnonymousApril 21,2022 at 7:47PM UTC
I left my previous job because of the exact predicament you are in. I was rolling up to 2 different managers and whenever each had a meeting that I was required to attend and those meetings conflicted, they would get upset with me because they felt their meeting was
more important than the other’s. If anyone should have been upset, it should have been me because I was stuck in the middle of it!! In the end, after the stress and anxiety this role caused me (it was not just reporting to 2 managers but a whole myriad of other awful things), I resigned after 6 months without a job in tow. It is absolutely not the way I’d normally do things (I’ve always had a job lined up before leaving a job but I knew if I stayed positive and stayed confident that I had the skill set to take on my next job I’d land something soon…and I did!), but for my sanity I knew this was the right decision for me.
KileyApril 22,2022 at 8:29AM UTC
Exact same thing happened to me. I was caught in the middle between 2 different leaders. I left after 4.5 month but had a new job lined up. More senior role, with significant pay and benefits increase. Best decision I ever made.
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 6:40PM UTC
OP here.
I feel better after having spoken with Manager 1 about it. I was very clear that I was telling her because a: we have a good working relationship, and b: I don't want this to fester and then have M1 be blindsided when this blows up, because it will.
I felt like I was heard, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed!
Karen GongawareApril 22,2022 at 6:01PM UTC
You can't work for 2 bosses. Period. They need to hire someone who has the hide of a rhino and an up yours attitude to work with #2.
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 6:36PM UTC
OP here.
I have done it before, but it was always with a team that was interconnected. Manager 1 and Manager two report to the same Big Manager, but the work that is being done is very different, and this is probably a part of the problem.
Manager 1 said the same thing when we spoke the other day about this.
AnonymousApril 22,2022 at 9:06PM UTC
Next weekly meetup you need to bring this up in front of both managers. Before that perhaps you can ask Mgr2 if they really just rolled their eyes at you. Pointedly. If they huff and don't respond bring that up in front of Mgr1, too - with everyone present. I feel for you, because your new job sounds perfect for you and you know what you're doing. Good luck!
LL CApril 22,2022 at 8:48PM UTC
I think you mentioned doing this but see if you, without mgr 2’s help, can find some people that can share the workload of publicity tours if that’s the biggest challenge. If you can do that hopefully it will free up your time and you can go to this mgr with a solution for making it work. If you can’t and you’re backed into a corner, you may just want to reconsider working for two managers if mgr 2 is as unreasonable as you say. Sometimes even when you present a good solution to a person like that, it’s never good enough for them.